Who is scared to give up food?

[smile121 66]

Ok, I am going to be really honest here, and l am petrified to give up food! food has been my friend, my enemy, my boyfriend, my lover my everything... in times when i didn't have all of the other things, or i wasn't getting my needs met! I am on my journey and I am ready to have a new life I know i don't want to be this weight for my health, but in the years I have dieted and lost a ton of weight, I have come to the conclusion that i am afraid of failing, and i am also afraid of SUCCEEDING!

I have had my appt with my surgeon, and nutritionist, I know that i want to do this. I am sure that this is the right decision, but is there anyone out there that is dealing with the FEAR?!?!?!?

[AWholeNewMama 34]

I'm okay with giving up my daily overeating habits, because I know I'll be so much happier when food is no longer my constant companion. But I am sad when I think about things like never being able to enjoy a big slice of deep dish pizza again, or eating a big dinner on a special occasion. I just keep trying to remind myself that I'm doing this so I can enjoy LIFE again, and life is so much more than food.

[SimplySheavon 22]

Well I can completely understand where you are coming from. All I can tell you is that I have really been serious about positive affirmations, good books to help, and therapy. We can absolutely move past this relationship with food and fear to a much more peaceful place and I is going to be so worth it. Don't worry, you are certainly on your way

[Sleeve101 72]

I'm 6 weeks post op and I wasn't prepared emotionally for giving up food. It's been a struggle, I was depressed for a while and still a little sad when I think about it a lot. I know food should be viewed as fuel - not fun - but I loved it so much!

So....I'm actually living your fear now...some days are better than others....and it's getting better everyday....

But I'd definitely recommend you see a therapist first so you can be emotionally prepared....I wish I had....

[smile121 66]

Thanks so much ladies! I love the idea of meditation and positive affirmations. I know that this is just a fear and i will get over it and I will be soo much happier. Right now i am in the pre approval stage. I have Cigna and i have to do a 3 month supervised diet with a nutritionist.

Sleeve,Thank you, and i am so sorry you are having such a hard time! I am currently in therapy, it was my therapist that suggested the surgery. I have been in therapy for years and come a long way, but i am just so scared that i will not be able to eat giant amounts of food like i am now. it feels good to just get that out there, and talk about it, because this is a HUGE life change. And it isn't easy! - i haven't really started yet and I don't think it is easy! lol

[SuperDave 1,115]

@@smile121 - I don't think of it as giving up anything, I think of all that I am gaining. I had the same fears as you, but I have really found them to be unwarranted. I said in a recent post that my weight loss surgery decision came down to deciding what was more important to me, food, or literally everything else in life. Once you fully commit to that decision, there is no turning back. You can instead make walking (or some other suitable activity) your friend, enemy, bf, lover, etc. It is truly just as satisfying, and you don't fell like $#!* after you do it!

You will find that food was not the helper you thought it was, but that it was actually what was holding you back from doing what you really wanted to do and being what you really wanted to be.

[blondiebabs 214]

I started seeing a psychologist a few weeks before I started this journey, when I was just in the pondering the idea of surgery. It has been very helpful. I have several anxieties/fears surrounding it and it's nice to kind of have a bouncing board to help me work through them. Not sure how I'll handle food issues, not sure how I'll handle being a thin adult since I've never been a thin adult, and the fears of failing and succeeding as well. =)

[smile121 66]

SuperDave, you are my hero right now! lol. you are so right, i know this is all my head talking and once i change my mind my perspective on food will change, along with my perspective on life. Thank you!

[old_rn 110]

I am almost 5 months out and you can have those foods you want eventually. I don't eat a lot of those things because I choose not to! I like how I feel, I can do so much more now and the gratification I got from food doesn't compare with my new freedom. I eat out, I work fulltime, I have a family, I cook....I do all the "normal" things I just have a tool that makes it easier to make good choices. I have never mourned food because I have found that it is like an ex-husband, you don't miss it when it is gone and wasn't worth your time anyway.

I hope this helps calm your concerns a little bit.

[smile121 66]

Oldrn- it absolutely does!!! Thank you so much! It feels good just getting my fear out there, and i know that my relationship with food has to END! just like an old relationship...

[Sleeve101 72]

Thank you! I'm doing a lot lot better than I was before. And I'm excited for summer for once in my life! This site and everyone here has been a blessing! It's helped me get through the hard part.

And it sounds like you're doing all the right things! We are stronger than we think!

You know I love watching the food Network, so seeing all the food and really just any food commercial on TV these days, makes me want food so bad and it makes me so sad to think that I can't have it, but the truth is - I can't have it RIGHT NOW, but eventually I will. And as far as not eating the large amounts - trust me, you will fear eating large amounts more than you will being deprived of it! It really is all in our heads. Our new stomachs CANT contain what our heads tell us we need. So we'll get it over the "feasting" mentality real quick! You'll be in Puke City if you try!!!

I'm excited for you!!!! Good luck!!!

[Cody's mom 247]

@@AWholeNewMama, I love pizza as well, and had one during Christmas, the difference is in the amount you eat. Don't deprive yourself, enjoy, you'll only want a few bites. I still love Chinese food, and have it still, just now I'm happy with two bites of each item, instead of the massive amounts I once ate. I have yet to find a Protein shake I like, so I have to rely on real foods and have since the second week out from surgery. Last night I had prime rib along with one spoonful of mashed potatoes, a bite of a yorkshire pudding and a spoonful of corn. It will surprise you how little will satisfy you so you can still enjoy eating, your just not living to eat anymore. Have your pizza on your cheat day, a few bites will be all you'll want, and you will love and enjoy it. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels, so once you start losing weight and feeling good about yourself, so much will change. I had pizza, chinese food and chocolate during Christmas and lost 5 pounds, maybe it would have been more had I not had those things, but I enjoyed every single mouthful (small mouthfuls and only one or two). This is not a death sentence, it's a life sentence, you don;t have to say goodbye to anything but the weight.

Good luck!

Edited January 8, 2015 by Cody's mom

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

It's a realistic fear.

I felt very "over food" by the time I had WLS so I welcomed kicking it to the curb as a friend, lover and soother. However, I discovered sometime after getting to goal that I had alot of anxiety that had been previously masked by obesity and overeating. It was a bit of a shocker to figure that out and deal with.

[RedSalamander 148]

I think it's important to remember that you're NOT giving up food. Once you're healed, ALL food will still be available to you--it will be up to you to manage how and what you eat. So you can still have your favorites, just mindfully and in smaller portions.

I have a good friend, who also happens to be a physician, who was sleeved quite a few years ago. He eats oreos. He eats cold cut subs. He eats cheeseburgers. The difference is both how often he chooses these things, and what the portion sizes are that he chooses. Everyone is different, but food isn't gone forever.

What should be gone is food as an emotional stand-in! That's the thing to work on now, I think.

[smile121 66]

It's a realistic fear.

I felt very "over food" by the time I had WLS so I welcomed kicking it to the curb as a friend, lover and soother. However, I discovered sometime after getting to goal that I had alot of anxiety that had been previously masked by obesity and overeating. It was a bit of a shocker to figure that out and deal with.

Did you have anxiety about being successful? I don't mean to pry.

Also, Congratulations on the weight loss!!! that is AMAZING!