Qustion to Vets: How did you know you had lost "Enough"?

[Terri Lynn1383837796 139]

I tried to post this question to the vet forum, but would not let me ..said I had to be a year out which I am...so not really sure what's up with that. Anyway, when starting this journey, I had a weight in mind that I wanted to reach...somewhere between 185 and 200. Over the course of my journey, I have reached 218. Could I lose more? Absolutely. However...it has gotten to a point that my friends and family are asking me when am I going to stop. You see...I have bones protruding on top...but skin at the bottom which I think makes we look "funny" to start with. Plastics are in my future...but no time soon as I do not have the money as I am still paying for my sleeve procedure. So I go back to my question...When did you know you had lost "Enough".. I thank you in advance for your time and answers, Terri:)

[AvaFern 3,516]

I suppose I am a vet now (yay). I am almost 16 months out from surgery and I am currently 132 pounds. I had an original goal weight of 129 although I have always had the magic number of 119 in my head- I just have never been this close to it as an adult. I am very number oriented, so I feel like when I hit 129, it will be awesome, but when I'm at 119 I will absolutely be done. Outside of that though, it is also about how I feel. I can now go into a store and almost all of the small sizes (and some extra small) fit me in tops and dresses and in bottoms I am anywhere from a 4-8 depending on the brand. I had plastic surgery (breast augment and lift, abdominoplasty, Lipo to a few areas, brachioplasty, and thigh lift) so the top half of me I am very good with but the bottom half of me I'm a little less happy with. As such, I am now at a point where I can be comfortable with my size and maintaining, but not at my goal number, and being goal oriented, I feel I will stop when I finally hit that point on the scale.

Really though, when I was no longer classified as overweight, which for my height was at 137, I figured I was now at a point where medically I was no longer a risk and I had eliminated nearly all of the risk factors associated with being fat. Ultimately the goal should be to be healthy...although I'll admit, my goal is to be hot..hahaha.

[CowgirlJane 14,260]

Terri, you have to make 100 posts before you can post in Vets forum.

This is a very individual subject and I would like to share my perspective of someone who lost significant weight and been at goal for nearly 2 years
(3 years post op)

My lifetime highest recorded weight was 332 - but I think I was in the 350s at some point - my start weight for the sleeve was 308. I am 5'5".

when I got under 200# I had all my family telling me I was "skinny" etc. My friends thought i looked wonderful and I felt comfortable. I was physically able to enjoy things in life, but frankly still had a comfortable layer of fat. I would say I looked like a fairly typical middle aged woman. My weight loss had crawled to a near halt and I spent some time thinking about what I really wanted.

Conclusion I came to is that i wanted to be trim/fit...or HAWT as is often said here. I made a big push and got to my goal of 158. My shoulders and chest looked bony, but that is because that is what happens after massvie weight loss. I looked less bony at 140 (which I dropped down to later) because weight redistributed.

So, people who didn't know me as obese, think I look good/great at my current weight. My sisters still think I am WAY too thin and they thought I weighed more like 125 versus 140-150, until I set them straight. My point is that you will always have people uncomfortable with what you choose.Flip side, I would have been absolutely fine and healthy settling on the 180-190 range. I think losing the last 30-50 pounds is more vanity than health related. I LIKE being in single digit clothing, being able to wear junior sizes readily etc. (When I got to 140 I had trouble finding pants small enough at my discount store Ross cuz I have a skinny butt).

Then there is maintenance.

I personally think that a healthy goal weight is first priority.

After that, it is a trade off between vanity and maintainability. I would LOVE to weigh 125-130 range but that isn't going to happen because it is quite some work for me to stay in the 140s...in fact I bounced up into the 150s over the last few months.

So, don't let other people's ideas control your thinking on this. Be healthy, don't get obsessed with the scale or thinness, but do what pleases you and what you can live with over the long haul.

BTW, you have had amazing results - I hope you feel so proud of our accomplishments!!!!!!!!

[Rogofulm 2,440]

I'm a numbers person too, and against all advice I weigh myself twice a day. So far that's been okay. Even during stalls, I understand what's happening, and while frustrating, I've been able to handle it. I'm starting to hear from family members that I'm getting "too thin", or that I'm "just right so don't lose any more". But my friends who have had WLS know what's hidden under our clothes. Again, I'm a numbers guy, so I established a goal that is exactly one pound into the "normal" BMI range for my height. I have to point out that "normal" goes down another 39 pounds from there before hitting "underweight", so it's not like I've set a crazy goal or anything. As I get closer, I'm starting to think about shooting for an additional 4 pounds to give myself some wiggle room before the "overweight" category kicks back in. Yeah, it's obsessive, but I need the structure of these goals to keep me honest. We'll see if it works....

[erp 2,016]

A lot of the "too thin" comments I got were either from people projecting their issues on to me, i.e. they are unhappy with their weight or they didn't like how my weight loss was changing the dynamics of our relationship (no longer the fat friend). Regardless, I used several "goal" indicators for myself. I wanted a: normal BMI, body fat under 30%, and a healthy weight for my height (140 lbs). When I hit all three I decided I had met my goal and was done. I would like to lose a few more pounds and get to 130 lbs, 24% body fat but that's for vanity. I wear a small/medium in clothes, size 4 or 6 dress depending on the brand. I'm good.

[Kindle 8,667]

I knew I lost enough when my body stopped losing. I'm 5'5" and I Started at 238. Lost 22 pounds preop. Passed surgeons goal (160) at 6 months out. I started eating at "maintenance level" at that point. Passed personal goal (150) 7 1/2 months out. Weight loss slowed and I have bounced between 137-141 for almost 4 months. Yes, I'm bony and I have loose skin, but I feel great and I can do all the things I want to do without effort, so that's the part that counts. I remember when I was 170 thinking that if I lost no more I would still be happy because I felt so good. Everything after that was bonus. And at this point if I gain some weight back, I'm OK with that too, as long as the feel good part is still there.

I don't really care what people have said about me being "too skinny". They are just used to seeing the old fat me, so it is a bit of a change in perception. Like seeing someone who's been blond their whole life suddenly become a brunette. Once you are thin for awhile the comments will stop because everyone will be used to seeing the skinny you. (Except the ones coming from jealous b*****s) Don't let anyone except you and your body dictate where to stop.

Edited January 10, 2015 by Kindle

[naturreal 7]

I think it's on your comfort level. Pre surgery @ 370 I'm at my 9 month mark & I'm currently weighing in at 280. I still have a gut & it doesn't look like I've lost the amount I've lost. Before surgery I lost 34 and so I'm looking for my comfort level. Not satisfied with my body yet so I'm gonna keep going & I only set out to for 100 off. Go figure. No I'm not a vet but I can understand where you're coming from...

[Terri Lynn1383837796 139]

Thanks to all for your answers...they really help!! Take care everyone!!

[livvsmum 2,369]

I think I knew (in my head) that I had lost "enough" when my body found its resting spot if that makes sense. I've been bouncing between 135-140 for the past 6 months with pretty little effort. To me, it kind of feels like that is my natural weight. Could I push it further and get down into the 120s? Absolutely. Will I? Maybe.... Who knows. But at the same time I feel that I could stay where I am right now comfortably and maintain for the long run.

As far as others' comments....I found that since they knew me for so many years at 280, when I got down below 200 the "when will you stop losing" and "you look too thin" comments started, even though I knew I still had a good 50 pounds to lose.

I just take the comments for what they are....people who (for the most part) have my best interests in mind, but ultimately I worked to find a weight that felt good to me and felt maintainable. I still would like to lose that last 10 or so pounds, but at the same time, I will be totally ok if I don't :-)

[SeahawksFan 444]

I am not a vet but I like this thread and wonder the same thing. I am at 129 now and I am happy with that but of course would love to be 120. And I am still losing so I am not to that point yet. My surgeon was like oh you could be 115 so I have that as my goal but not really sure how attainable and more importantly maintainable that will be so I will have to wait and see. I want to maintain it without being miserable and be able to buy clothes and not worry that it's going to not fit. (Either being to big or to small)

~LA