Sad and shocked

[AvaFern 3,516]

If it makes you feel better, I saw myself in a security video the other day, and I was like, holy crap, I do not look hot! As of this morning I am 132 pounds and it looks like I wadddle when I walk. Also, my butt is giant looking compared to how I thought it looked in a mirror. I have a camera at my house that we turn on when we're leaving and I forgot to turn if off while I was changing one day a few months ago...oh yes, naked Ava was not hot at all- I could actually see all my rolls of skin flapping as I walked. That day I decided on plastic surgery.

At any rate, I also know how you feel about seeing yourself on camera, although I also tend to wonder if our opinion is not influenced by the other people we see on camera. For the most part, we don't see normal people on video- we see touched up, attractive, movie stars in the video medium, so when we compare ourselves, it's not quite the same thing as seeing a picture, where we're used to what normal people look like. Unfortunately, video doesn't lie, but maybe our perception is a little off. (Or at least I hope so, lol)

[VGB 130]

To the OP:

How much do you weigh now?

If you were talking to me 268!

[VGB 130]

I keep watching the video to see if I would see myself differently!! Nope!!! Still hard to watch! ????

[scstxrn 213]

I don't love seeing fat pictures or fat video of me... and it's pretty much all been fat for oh, say, 15 years... but I still love me, and I think I've got pretty decent self image.

The tummy that will never be tight without surgical intervention grew two beautiful children. The legs that strongly resemble tree trunks hold me up... and the arms with bat wings are excellent at holding babies.

I was 335 the day I decided to have surgery, 305 the day I scheduled it, and 295 the day of. I'm 270 today - exactly 4 weeks out from surgery.

When I graduate with my MSN this August, I hope to be around 200 - and I hope I will still love me.

[AlessandraMarie 0]

Someone help me please!!! I was in hospital for 3 weeks cause I almost committed suicide.. I'm tired of being made fun of tired of not being able to look at my self in the mirror I've tried allot of things and they just don't work I heard about this sleeve and I live in buffalo ny I have no clue where to go for consultation someone please help me

[VGB 130]

Try this doctor! I am praying that this is your breakthrough! Lord, let this broken hearted person know that you love her and that you will help her! Give her a peace and never let anyone tell her, she is not a beautiful person! In Jesus Name I pray....Amen

[AlessandraMarie 0]

I just moved here from a different state and I live in west Seneca is there someone closer?

[AlessandraMarie 0]

And thank you for that!

[AlessandraMarie 0]

I sure needed it

[VGB 130]

I live in the south so I don't know what is close and what is not! Just google a bariatric doctor near your area! Good Luck and God Bless you!

[AlessandraMarie 0]

I tried..

[VGB 130]

I would try that doctor I sent to you! I am traveling 3 1/2 hours to have my surgery! Sometimes you have to do a little extra as you know it all won't just fall into your lap!

[Catherine Gray 11]

I can totally agree with you. Ive always been heavier but since 2010 its gotten way out of hand. I weigh 316, and 5'9. I have seen myself in the mirror and like man I suck it in, or angle myself.

Well for xmas my daughter got a tablet. I was on the phone and she started taking pics. Later on she told me to come see. I was mortifies! Who was that in those pictures?!?! Where had she been hiding all these years. Its amazing how deceiving we can be to ourselves.

So glad im moving forward with the sleeve.

[Catherine Gray 11]

Sorry for the typos.

[VGB 130]

I wouldn't take Christmas pictures but next year we are mailing cards with pictures and all!!!