Friendships and Gastric bypass surgery

[InspirationMySon 135]

It seems like you already know what kind of "friend" this person is. Of the good qualities she may or may not have it appears that she by far has more sabotaging qualities which won't be good for your wellbeing post op.

I guess feel people out by asking what they think about it & go from there. Join a local support group for patients looking to undergo or have undergone your preferred surgery. Begin working with a Bariatric counselor to sort out your emotional "baggage" that accompanies your weight.

But honestly I can be down on myself all by myself I don't need a "friend" bringing me down too saying things like she's said to you. There is a huge difference between being honest a saying some thing when you get a bad vibe & entirely other to say they only like you because of your insecurities. It seems like she's the insecure one.

[MiaStacey 18]

@@leag78

I understand you I have a friend that already isn't being supportive. She tells me that I don't lose weight because I don't want too. She tells me all you have to do is eat well and exercise and you don't have to go the easy route by having surgery.

[Pac-woman 325]

Ugh. "Easy way out". That makes my blood boil. There is nothing easy about this.

[MiaStacey 18]

@@Pac-woman

I know but some people will never understand how difficult it is. They think that ok you have surgery and that's it you loose all the weight. It really upsets me when they say it is the easy way out.

[Pac-woman 325]

@@MiaStacey those people diet for a few weeks. We kind of "diet" for the rest of our lives. In one way or another.

[leag78 469]

@@InspirationMySon, I've thought about all those points you made. When I say she has some good qualities I'm talking about when I need her she's there. If I ever needed anything she'd give it to me no questions asked. We've been friends for almost 20 years and me call each other sisters.

I just don't like her way of thinking, because in her mind it's all about her. If this were her movie she'd be the hero and I'd be the sidekick. I noticed that most of these posts are talking about friends who are also plus size. I haven't heard any one mention that they have a skinny friend. So was I hanging out with the wrong crowd in the first place.

[Pac-woman 325]

@@leag78 Nothing wrong with having skinny friends. As long as their personalities has a balance and not just so vain. I have a skinny friend who is a gym rat. She is so happy for me.

My sister is skinny, she disagreed with the surgery. But now that it is done, she is going to try to support me in anything I need, a shoulder to cry on, entertainment while I am recouping, listening to her calorie restriction worries, but she is there for me.

I think what we need to be alert or concerned with is people (in general) who are ill willed and will be jealous but will reflect it in a negative fashion. Big, or skinny, short or tall.

You said that if this was a movie, she would be the star and your the sidekick. Well my friend, time to get a new star and have her be the sidekick for once. After all, this journey is your blockbuster movie now!

[Raec69 11]

I've had several really good friends through out the years but there is one in particular that feels the need to criticize but yet can't take the same advice they are giving. Kind of like being competitive but in a sly, snake kind of way. Don't get me wrong that person has a Heart of Gold but since I started my journey we have drifted apart. It's considered a casual yet social friendship. On another note.. My relationship with My husband of 28 yrs. has not changed at all. He sees me like the same person who he met 31 yrs. ago. Same old Me

[leag78 469]

That's why I'm just preparing myself for what I already know. She's too self absorbed and I believe in my heart that our friendship will dwindle.

[Raec69 11]

@pacwoman

Now you have a whole new set of friends here... Just concentrate on u & your Health & on ur Recovery. Prayers for a Speedy Recovery ????

[Raec69 11]

@pacwoman

Now you have a whole new set of friends here... Just concentrate on u & your Health & on ur Recovery. Prayers for a Speedy Recovery ????

[Raec69 11]

@pacwoman

Now you have a whole new set of friends here... Just concentrate on u & your Health & on ur Recovery. Prayers for a Speedy Recovery .

[Raec69 11]

@pacwoman

Now you have a whole new set of friends here... Just concentrate on u & your Health & on ur Recovery. Prayers for a Speedy Recovery .

[Raec69 11]

@pacwoman

Now you have a whole new set of friends here... Just concentrate on u & your Health & on ur Recovery. Prayers for a Speedy Recovery.

[Raec69 11]

@pacwoman

Now you have a whole new set of friends here... Just concentrate on u & your Health & on ur Recovery. Prayers for a Speedy Recovery.