female only Memories

[Samantha Ann 46]

I had surgery Oct 27. Extremely excited about my process. Dating a new man, down to size 22 (I have never been a size 22), happy.

I'm losing some friends and that's fine. I've always been the type of girl that didn't put up with much bs when it came to jealousy and all that. I have a group of friends that we called ourselves the fat girls. Now that I've had surgery, and my other friend had the sleeve, we're both finding out how rude people are. I wish we had a support group around the Joplin, or Missouri area. Or friends who are going through the same thing. People to meet up for lunch, or a movie.

[pupichupi 124]

I know how you feel, I am lucky that I have a very supportive family and in-law family but it's not the same as knowing someone in my area that had this surgery too, to just go for a coffee or dinner and be able to talk about what is going on with me. I really haven't lost many friends from the surgery, cause I don't have many friends to begin with, I just don't have time for dramatic people that I want to deal with crap that can't be controlled? I work all day and go home to take care of my kids and family. I don't have a lot of time for anyone else's issues, and I like it that way? I have always been a friend to all but a loner to myself type of person. It works for me.

[Gingerisgreat 56]

I am very fortunate that my best friend of 10 years had the sleeve in June. She had her surgery and I stayed with her all day in the hospital, then the following morning I saw her surgeon for my very first pre-op eval (Obviously I had attended informational meetings and met with nutritionist prior to this, but had to wait to see the surgeon). I researched the sleeve myself however my reasons for needing surgery were not the exact same as hers, obviously we both had extra weight to lose, however she had hypertension and sleep apnea. I had neither of those, but I have PCOS, chronic pelvic pain that was not resolved with two prior surgical interventions, multiple female complications including hot flashes, night sweats, and severe anxiety all due to hormonal imbalances. I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic and Insulin Resistant back in March, and I was told that it was inevitable that one day I would be on Insulin as a result. During my pre-surgical testing, I was diagnosed with esophagitis as well as stomach ulcers and started on two more meds for those diagnoses. In the year prior to my surgery I was screened for cancer in three regions of my body, and I am only 33. After watching my best friend of all those years undergo this surgery and walk out of the hospital off of all of her medications, I just KNEW that I needed to make the decision! I chose RNY because I needed the absorption change in order to give my body the best chance possible of overcoming my hormonal difficulties as well as IR, and sleeve is more risky if you have an ulcer. BUT I HAVE NO REGRETS!!!!!! I am still on pureed foods until tomorrow, however this last week while enjoying a VERY nice and overdue shopping day out with this BFF (whom I might add has almost reached a 100 pound loss in the last 6 months and LOOKS INCREDIBLE), we were both able to shop together in areas of the store other than plus size! She is about two sizes smaller than I currently but we joke about being able to share wardrobe again soon since now neither of us have much that fits! While on our shopping day, we stopped at a Panera bread for lunch and we were able to share a cup of their clam chowder for our lunch. We both ate and were satisfied off a SHARED $4 lunch!!! NOTE: You don't feel so bad buying yourself a new top for $20 when your lunch only cost you $2.....and the bonus is that you can wear your new item time and time again!!!! Now, why did I share this info about my journey through this with my BFF? Because I want to encourage you to find someone new that shares this experience with you!!!!! I am lucky to have the most amazing husband and this very dear friends by my side, and I SERIOUSLY commend ALL of you that have done this alone and without the kind of support that I have had. I am VERY VERY lucky, and I know it. I thank God for them both as I am certain I would have had a MUCH harder time with this process had I been doing it alone. Yes it has been hard to not be able to eat what my husband does, and I was on pureed diet on our one year wedding anniversary even so we were unable to Celebrate in the fashion that we would have in the past. But knowing that I am going to feel better and be able to live every day to the fullest from here on out is well worth those small sacrifices. Surround yourselves with people that understand that!!!! For our one year wedding anniversary, I made us homemade shrimp bisque Soup and I pureed my little portion. I lit candles on our table and we ate by candlelight at home. For dessert I made us little ramekins of a sugar free vanilla custard topped with sugar free cool whip. It was still romantic, and my husband never complained. He is now taking his health seriously and has set a goal to start running again as he used to run marathons. Now I am going to join him in his running. I wish I lived close enough to you girls to start a WLS club with encouragement and friendship, but that is what this forum is for! Good Luck to you all, visit a local support group and find new friends that encourage you, IT WILL BE WORTH IT!!!!

[Samantha Ann 46]

Thank you! I'm finding a lot of people from highschool have been so supportive. I've been doing girl days with these people that I haven't seen in over 11 years. Its nice.