Things people don't seem to talk about...

[April4 24]

All I seem to see on here are how amazing everyone is doing, how they're the model patients, getting all their Protein, Vitamins, Water intake, daily hours in the gym etc. I had my surgery in Nov 14 and here's what I e learnt so far....

1) some foods that are bad for you are easier to eat e.g chocolate

2) I'm still hungry and I still crave all the food I did before

3) you get bored or the same food choices very quickly

4) Protein shakes, Protein Bars are disgusting

5) your breath stinks and you have a taste of metal/metallic in your mouth

6) you don't lose the weight as quickly as you might think/hope... but you do lose

7) the novelty of only being able to eat soft tiny portions wears off and sometimes you wish you could join the rest of the family for a big old dirty Chinese

Having said all that it is worth it, I'm so glad I had it done. In 2 months I've lost almost 35 pounds. I thought I wouldn't be hungry... I am. I thought I wouldn't be able to eat chocolate/sweet stuff... I am. I've now accepted that and know I need to resist as much as I can.

[KristenVSG2014 1,872]

I'm sure you've seen on here multiple times that the sleeve is simply a tool to help you lose weight. You still have to use willpower and choose what you put in your mouth. Especially around the holidays. I ate a fruit cake cookie the other day. No big deal. It was just one and I stayed within my calorie limits and met my Protein requirements.

I was sleeved 11/3 and I get hungry but not ravenous like before surgery. I've also noticed sometimes when I think or feel hungry I'm actually dehydrated so I strategically plan when I will eat and drink during the day. I don't do this perfectly. In fact I find it much more difficult during the weekend. But I do the best I can.

If I'm craving Chinese I find a delicious recipe online that focuses on Protein and I skip the rice or noodles. The other day I made jambalaya with sausage, chicken and shrimp. I ate the meat only and serve it with rice for my husband. It's even possible to eat out! I went to an Italian restaurant and ordered chicken Parmesan grilled, not breaded, and served over veggies rather than Pasta. It was delicious! I haven't gotten bored at all because I keep cooking and trying new things.

I only get the metallic taste when I haven't had enough Water. One thing I noticed is flossing daily is absolutely critical when taking in lots of meat. Skip a few days and you will notice for sure!

Most people I think are so thrilled with the pros of the sleeve they are willing to overlook the cons. I miss eating Publix subs but when I step on the scale and it keeps going down I remember it is totally worth it!

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

WELL......hun. I guess you haven't read any of my story....It has been on here for all to read.....

All the things people deal with on here are things that were not explained to them before the surgeries. what you read are their heart felt concerns over whether deep down in side they can handle anything that they face. To the smallest question to the smallest fear to the exact thing they are going through right now. I would rather they put it here so we can help then for them to have to deal on their own and flounder around as so many professionals have no clue what we deal with.....

I say bring on the whole deal. Lets be there for one another and make it that much easier to deal with the unknowns. I am happy for you that you are finding little related to yourself and your needs. The fact that you are testing the waters with sweets at this stage, says to me that you had an emotional attachment to them. That means others here can relate to you.

Trust me when I tell you that it is going to be a real test for you to continue with the changes you are making...It is a lot of emotional, mental and physical changes to deal with..And it is all in your head the changes that need to be made. And you may find that it will take a struggle of a life time to do it....

I hope that you continue to find the pros in your favor.......

Edited December 21, 2014 by RJ'S/beginning

[IcanMakeit 1,318]

I still eat Chinese food often. I just skip the carbs altogether and ask them to cook my food with no sugar or corn starch, and less oil. It helps that I go to the same place that I've been going for the last 25 years and they know me very well.

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

I was warned from the beginning that it is possible to stretch your sleeve. I was also warned that you need to follow the diet and again, it's only a tool. I knew it wasn't a magic wand to remove all my cravings and bad habits. That's the work I have to do. I attended my hospital's support group meeting yesterday and one of the things I emphasized to the group was purchase a variety of Protein drinks in order to compact the palette fatigue you get from drinking sweet all the time. At my f/u appointment on Friday I shared with my nutritionist how I'm learning self control. I have indeed had chocolate. The difference is I eat a tiny bit and stop now. A Hershey's kiss will satisfy that craving so I don't need and entire bag. I've never had a metallic taste or bad breath. I like cooking so I'm constantly creating and trying new recipes. Big old dirty Chinese was never my thing. I miss my giant, crispy and actually healthy salad but I'm okay with my smaller one.

I think it's important to view this positively and not, "I'm happy but..."

There is nothing I miss more than how I am doing now. Not one single thing.

[MichiganChic 3,262]

All I seem to see on here are how amazing everyone is doing, how they're the model patients, getting all their Protein, Vitamins, Water intake, daily hours in the gym etc. I had my surgery in Nov 14 and here's what I e learnt so far....

1) some foods that are bad for you are easier to eat e.g chocolate

2) I'm still hungry and I still crave all the food I did before

3) you get bored or the same food choices very quickly

4) Protein shakes, Protein Bars are disgusting

5) your breath stinks and you have a taste of metal/metallic in your mouth

6) you don't lose the weight as quickly as you might think/hope... but you do lose

7) the novelty of only being able to eat soft tiny portions wears off and sometimes you wish you could join the rest of the family for a big old dirty Chinese

Having said all that it is worth it, I'm so glad I had it done. In 2 months I've lost almost 35 pounds. I thought I wouldn't be hungry... I am. I thought I wouldn't be able to eat chocolate/sweet stuff... I am. I've now accepted that and know I need to resist as much as I can.

Stick around long enough, or search deep enough, and you'll find plenty of stories of people eating hamburgers at two days post op, chewing and spitting, or eating around their sleeves. I think one of the reasons you see more posts of model patients is because we are the ones who are determined to make the changes required, accept the limitations, and do the hard work needed, and because of our commitment, so we come here for support. People who can't or won't do that most likely are not going to keep coming to a community of people who are.

As for your list, it's a good one. Many of the items on it probably true for most of us. I am sorry that you are hungry and craving food. Have you been able to determine the difference between true hunger and just wanting food? It's hard to tell, especially at first. I spent my whole life not really knowing the difference, but since the sleeve, I've learned there is a subtle difference. I always find myself hungry at the end of the work day, and I want to eat everything that's not nailed down when I get home. I really have to fight against that. It's from years of habit and a way of dealing with work stress. It's not pleasant at all, and to my brain and body, it feels like hunger, but I resist the urge to feed it. It's when my will power is necessary. If I can find a pleasant distraction, or get a little exercise, I find that hunger actually lifts. It took me a long time after surgery to finally figure out the difference.

I am happy for you that you are happy you had the surgery! I bet you'll be one of the ones coming here, determined to succeed. It's so worth all the work we have to do!

[MeAndTinyTina 241]

Hi April4,

I use this forum mostly to post successes. My personal belief system is that what you focus on the most shapes your personal reality. I prefer to read the positive stories. But, there are some challenges, like RJ's Beginnings, that I also follow because of the attitude - positive, strong and realistic. Even though this is just an online group, I feel like I "know" the frequent posters and I care about what happens to them.

I agree with some items on your list - but I don't think about them too often. I'm too busy enjoying the tons of compliments at work, responding to the eligible men that are all of a sudden finding me fascinating on the dating site "our time", and shopping for clothing without an X in them! I carry mints with me all the time, I don't bother with Protein bars (but do enjoy powders?utm_source=BariatricPal&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=CommentLink" target="_ad" data-id="1" >unjury shakes with light soy milk once a day), and when my friends suggest Chinese, I counter with Tai instead, so that I can get a chicken or stake satay appetizer (meat on a stick with peanut dipping sauce) just so I can feel like I'm participating with everyone else.

But I do hear you loud and clear and I understand what you're saying. I don't know how old you are - I'm 56 - and that may be part of it. For me, I have had enough of being morbidly obese. I NEED the rest of my life to be different, and the clock is ticking way too fast. Non of the negatives I've experienced are worth worrying about.

Hang in there and enjoy the ride if you can! You lost a lot already in just two months (mush faster than me). You'll do great - have faith!

Ellen

[AvaFern 3,516]

I can understand that you think most of us only post the good things. I'm one of those people because, rude as it sounds, whiny people annoy me so I try to spare others from my own complaining. In the end, I made the decision to get the sleeve, and as such, I own the consequences. Also, complaining about something never has really gotten me anywhere, so that may be the rationale behind why people tend to post more positive than negative.

So...for your list. chocolate and sweets make me insanely sick, but plain old boring ice cream is way easier to eat than Protein. At 15 months out, I still can't choke down more than 1/3 of a chicken sandwich and sometimes this makes me very annoyed. I am not hungry fortunately, however I do get head hungry occassionally and I find myself munching away on things I shouldn't eat. Yes, the same food gets boring...but there are a lot of ways to switch it up. Honestly, I like being skinny more than I like exciting food, but at the same time I've found ways to eat a pretty big variety of food as long as I don't get too crazy (Peruvian ceviche put me on a 6 hour puking bender that I will never do again). Yes, Protein bars and shakes are gross- I don't eat or drink them and I never have. My goal is to try this more often though in the future...go check out the post "Does anyone actually like their Protein Drink?" I posted that the other day and people gave me excellent suggestions.

My breath doesn't stink and once you move into solid foods, yours won't either. Use a toungue scraper until then. A big reason your breath stinks now is because you don't have the mechanical act of chewing things that scrape your toungue and eliminate the bad breath. That part will improve once you get to go to normal foods. Nope, you don't lose weight that quickly, but if you stick with it, you will eventually get to goal. It's a basic process of math- more calories out (exercise and just the process of living) and less calories in (which is what your sleeve is for).

Yes, sometimes I wish I could really sit down and enjoy a good hearty meal. Then I think about the fact that the size 4 dress I'm wearing fits me beautifully and I like the way I look in mirrors now. I can have a few bites of whatever I want and then I am full. The volume of food I gave up has given me the life I had given up on before, and I can still eat whatever I want to, just in smaller portions. I would say that is a fair trade.

So you're right...sometimes it seems like everyone here is sunshine and daisies, but at least for me it's because I choose to own the decision I made to have surgery and I recognize that complaining about it does me no good. I am very happy with my sleeve decision and while it comes at a cost, the reward for me has been more than worth the aggravation.

In a few weeks you will start to have normal food and a year from now you will most likely be ecstatic with your decision. Like anything in life, that which is most awesome, is not that which is handed to you on a silver platter. Your silver platter right now has mushy food on it...this time next year it will have a few nice bites of good food and you will be eating off that platter wearing something you could only dream about now. Enjoy the process....I promise, it will all be worth it in the end.

[Elode 8,093]

And that my friend is why they call it a "journey" everyone is different. I read plenty of post on here almost daily about people not getting in the right amount of fluids, hate Protein Drinks, not losing fast enough, still hungry, wishing they could eat more, Ect...heck I think you could find all of that in the last 24 hrs! I myself am a mix. I do get in what I'm suppose to. I am losing at what I feel is appropriate for me, I let my body do its thing so no pressure. I have a variety of foods so I don't eat the same things all the time, I HATE the metallic taste but I deal, I will also hate losing my hair so it is what it is. I don't have hungry and I'm elated that I don't want or have any desire to eat large portions...hell that's what Got me in this mess in the first place! So see it's different for everyone! I think it's a lot in what you put into it. Something's you really need to do like Protein but you don't have to eat the same thing all the time, you just have to put some effort into finding some recipes that suit your requirements. Everyone can make adjustments one way or another to help the process along if they so choose. Variety is nice!

[Babbs 14,681]

@@April4

1) some foods that are bad for you are easier to eat e.g chocolate

You are still healing. As you continue to heal and go through your stages, you will find many foods will be easier to eat, including the dense Protein that will help you lose weight and build muscle mass. chocolate doesn't do that.

2) I'm still hungry and I still crave all the food I did before

Hunger is all relative. It could be head hunger, or it really could be true hunger. Many sleevers still feel it, and I am one of them. I am glad I still feel the cravings and the hunger after surgery. It has taught me the self discipline I needed to resolve the issues with food I've had my whole life.

3) you get bored or the same food choices very quickly

You're only a little over 6 weeks out. Soon, you will be able to eat a wide variety of foods as you continue to heal. Boredom gone.

4) protein shakes, Protein bars are disgusting

They may be "disgusting", but you have to look at it almost as a prescription you have to take (like your vitamins). They are needed right now as your tummy heals and they are giving you the much needed protein you can't possibly get right now from just food. You won't be drinking Protein Shakes forever.

5) your breath stinks and you have a taste of metal/metallic in your mouth

Hallelujah! This means you're going through ketosis, and you're burning fat! Isn't this the reason you had the surgery? There's a reason they invented breath mints....

6) you don't lose the weight as quickly as you might think/hope... but you do lose

Some of us lose faster than others. Don't compare. As long as you're still losing, the surgery is working! It didn't take a few weeks to put on all the weight, did it? Losing weight the right and healthy way takes time.

7) the novelty of only being able to eat soft tiny portions wears off and sometimes you wish you could join the rest of the family for a big old dirty Chinese

When a few months go by, and you are sitting there many pounds down, feeling wonderful and in control of your own food choices, it's not going to matter what everyone else is eating. You may even feel disgusted at the sheer amounts of food others can eat, and be happy you don't eat like that anymore.

Edited December 21, 2014 by Babbs

[Crystal88 85]

I agree with you on everything, BUT #4. I haven't tried Protein bars, but i love my chocolate Protein shakes. If I wasn't drinking 2-3 of them each day, that would just mean more room for things that I SHOULDN'T have but do, like you said, chocolate.< /p>

All I seem to see on here are how amazing everyone is doing, how they're the model patients, getting all their Protein, Vitamins, Water intake, daily hours in the gym etc. I had my surgery in Nov 14 and here's what I e learnt so far....
1) some foods that are bad for you are easier to eat e.g chocolate
2) I'm still hungry and I still crave all the food I did before
3) you get bored or the same food choices very quickly
4) Protein Shakes, Protein Bars are disgusting
5) your breath stinks and you have a taste of metal/metallic in your mouth
6) you don't lose the weight as quickly as you might think/hope... but you do lose
7) the novelty of only being able to eat soft tiny portions wears off and sometimes you wish you could join the rest of the family for a big old dirty Chinese

Having said all that it is worth it, I'm so glad I had it done. In 2 months I've lost almost 35 pounds. I thought I wouldn't be hungry... I am. I thought I wouldn't be able to eat chocolate/sweet stuff... I am. I've now accepted that and know I need to resist as much as I can.

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

seem to see how amazing everyone is doing

@@April4

good news bud

many people feel miserable, have problems

lots of people post that they feel terrible, miserable with problems

posts about vomiting, gas, being very tired, no energy, Constipation, diarrhea, neck hurting, hair loss, Protein shakes, not losing enough weight in a quick period of time, other people doing better than they are plus many other things

people (me) ;)also enjoy talking about their NSVS's (non sleeve victory)

health tremendously improving

no need for certain meds like diabetes, high blood pressure, CPAP

getting on an air plane not needing a seat belt extender

feeling like the airplane seats have gotten bigger

truth is you've gotten smaller

being able to sit in between 2 other people on the plane

being able to walk better

fitting into smaller size clothes (clothes shopping is a frequent wonderful discusssion)

being able to walk past a long mirror at Kohl's and not cringing

being able to sit at a booth

sitting at that booth with room between your stomach and the booth

not worrying that you might break a chair

putting your seat forward in a car - because you don't need as much room

crossing your legs

tying your shoes

feet getting smaller

realizing you have a collar bone

confidence going through the roof

being able to go out amongst people not feeling self conscious

more things i can't think of

my memory didn't improve with weight loss

people (me) feeling happy

what is wrong very with that

guess who have enjoyed the above happening them

just a few things that you can look forward to

as far as the good we have found - we need to talk about that too

but that is more fun!!

i'm reallllly glad you like the sleeve

you are losing weight

you will continue to lose more weight for the rest of your healthier, happier, longer, life

who deserves it more

you will like experiencing the above too

bad stuff does happen that we need to talk about

but the good - is very good

i might have made my point much earlier and kept talking

sorry, don't know when to shut up sometimes

still friends

hugggggs

good luck

kathy

Edited December 21, 2014 by proudgrammy

[old_rn 110]

I agree that there are some things that aren't sunshine and roses. After 4mo I can finally drink plain Water. I still can't drink anything cold though. I never had a Protein amount and was told to not drink shakes or eat bars if I can avoid it. I found a bar I like and it comes in a couple of flavors so I keep those on hand when I don't have time to eat my "real" food. I still have head hunger. I try and make it stop by doing something else or drinking some of the never ending water. I don't know if or when I will be able to eat roast beef. It made me sick not once but twice and am smart enough to avoid it a third time. I have found that a lot of the food that I shouldn't eat I don't want to eat. bread, Pasta and Cereal were favorite foods but now I would rather be able to park at the far end of the parking lot and walk the distance than go back and have those foods and not be able to walk around the block. Plus without those foods I no longer have swelling in my legs and feet. I am a long way from my goal and I don't lose fast but I am slow and steady and lose at least 1lb every week. I can go up stairs and breathe when I get to the top, I can sit in a lawn chair and not spill out of it, no more cholesterol meds, no more cpap and no fibromyalgia pain that I can't tolerate on a daily basis. I would do the sleeve again a 100 times to feel this good

[April4 24]

Thanks for the replies. The post was more of a rant than complaining. Again I stress I am thrilled I had the sleeve, I knew about some of what to expect, I knew my lifestyle choices would change. The main reason for the post was balance. I understand when you say you don't want to post the negative stuff, you just want the upbeat success stories and all that good stuff. All of that is great, it gives hope and promise however only posting the good stuff is not reality. People do not come here to get a "Disneyfied" version of WLS. I WANT to know all the shit people have to deal with. If every other post is a "I got out of surgery Tuesday, back to work Thurs and running a marathon by Sunday" .... It makes the vast majority feel like failures before they even begin. I want to urge people to post all your crap as well as the good stuff so this site can be more balanced than it currently is!

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

Funny how perception varies. I think I see more post complaining about complications and pain than stories where everything was easy.