Need serious help!

[Nicky Cleaver 5]

Hey all... I have failed.

I had my operation in July and have had two fills since then. I originally lost weight but have been eating badly the last few months and have put the weight back on. I was scheduled to have another fill but I cancelled it because I was ashamed to face the facts. I told myself I will lose the weight first and then have another fill... I know I need one as I don't feel much restriction at all.

Does anyone have any advice?

I don't need any tough love at the moment to be honest, I feel pretty shit and am so angry at myself

Thanks

[Pandora14 5]

Get a fill. Its a tool to help you not a punishment. Losing weight and maintaining it is hard work. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself a break get the fill and go back to basics. X hope that helps.

[B-52 7,113]

I had my first fill 4 weeks after surgery...4cc's

was told to come back in another 4 weeks, and that I would be coming in every 4 weeks for at least 6 months.

Anyway, after my first fill, I started to GAIN WEIGHT!!! I too was a little hesitant about going in for my second post op visit...

My Dr. laughed at me....said all new patients are the same, we just don't "get It"

He explained everything the best he could to me, how the band worked, it is adjustable and can take time, explained why I had to come in every 4 weeks, explained the "Yellow-Green-Red" zone poster he had hanging on the wall.....

So he gave me my second fill, 2cc's for a total of 6, which was 8 weeks after surgery. After my second fill I stopped gaining weight....really did not loose either, just held steady until I came in for my 3rd fill....now 12 weeks after surgery...he gave me only 1cc, which now came to 7cc's total.....

That last fill, of 1cc, put me over the top fir sure....like many people here reported, I could not keep anything down, even trouble with liquids...this went on for weeks. called him to get that last 1cc taken out, but he talked me into waiting it out a little longer....I'm glad he did. It was not the band that was the problem, it was me...I had to to change to meet the expectations of the band....but that's another story.

I read posts her everyday from people, many who have just has surgery withing the last 90 days, sometimes as little as a week or two, complaining or rejoicing about the weight they either loosing or not loosing....

IT DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!!! We're talking about something that will change you for the rest of your life (if you let it)...it takes time to get it all balanced out...took me 4-6 months before the band really kicked in and I started to loose consistently....took around a year before I started to feel comfortable and normal living well within the Green Zone...been there ever since, longer I'm there the EASIER it gets!

EASIEST THING I COULD HAVE EVER DONE!!!! But getting there was the hard part!

It's now 4 years and I don't think about it all that much...what and how to eat is now second nature, normal.

So to all those just starting out, stop and think about it.....give it a chance...give it time....and start now to learn the lessons that you will need to survive later down the road as the band starts to do it's thing. Lessons like a new way of eating. Which foods to give up. What kind of foods to concentrate on...and most importantly IMO, is how to "LISTEN" to your band, learn how it will speak to you and what it is trying to say....if you get stuck, etc, it's saying something!!!

And remember, in spite of the negative posts, this thing DOES WORK!

I have no fear of the Holidays, no needed strategies or challenges (other than enjoy myself) because I have learned to live with the band and let it dictate everything. Not me.

Edited December 21, 2014 by B-52

[Kitt3000 757]

@@Nikky,

Not a failure hon, it's a process. Really. Trust it.

B52 really says it all above, I have also found wisdom in lisacaron' s post.(thanks guys!)

It's hard to come to the realization that this has changed your life, stop fighting your band, listen - it's talking to you...

Docs have seen it all. Let your shame and fear go. Ask the professionals for help.

[Bandista 7,466]

Hi there, put those medical professionals to work -- they are there for you! Please don't beat yourself up. You chose weight loss surgery because you want a healthy future -- that was a big decision. Pat yourself on the back for that and know that we all get where you're coming from and truly you are on your way. I am some one that needed several fills. No shame in that -- it's just science and how we all vary. At times I was (am) frustrated by how long it felt like it was all taking -- is taking -- but in truth I needed the time for all the behavioral adjustments I had to make. For me it was a process to really learn to notice everything and then to listen. A year later and I am amazed by the results. Getting that appetite monster off my back was a miracle but I needed the fills for that to happen. Otherwise it was just dieting and we all know how impossible that was and why we elected surgery. Good luck to you -- you're doing great.

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

Never never never give up on yourself. Go to the doc, get a fill and get that band working for you. You deserve good health and success!!! We are all human. Climb back on that horse. We're here for you!

Edited December 26, 2014 by JustWatchMe

[Hope41 13]

B-52 you are truly an inspiration to all of us, thank you for sharing that with us.????????

[donna450 130]

I agree. I am 16 months post op. I'm still learning to listen...but have paid my dues and have learned quite a bit. Don't be ashamed. Your doctor has gone through this in his/her career...you just need to realize you're human and learning is a process. Give yourself time but also a pat on the back..you realized you had a problem and you're doing the right thing in helping you and the band work together...you're going in the right direction...just let your doc know what issues your having. Good luck

[2bfaithful 9]

Hey Nicky,

I feel your pain, guilt and sadness. I had my surgery in October and I still do not feel any restriction. It is very difficult and I keep beating myself up as I'm starting to gain weight as well. I guess it is easy to go back to the old way of thinking and beating ourself up for not doing as well as we think we should. Thank you so much for your words of encouragement from B52, that is exactly what I needed. I think it is so much more emotional process and a life change like you pointed out and I have to be more kind and patient with myself. I'm having another fill in 2 weeks and I will keep trying each day to make good choices, knowing it is a life change choice. I hope this fill will also help me.

Nicky, I hope you see your doctor and I hope you have been encouraged by all of the kind words and support. I know we can do it, we just have to hang in there:)

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Don't stop! Keep in mind we all had to have this surgery because of the poor decisions we'd made for countless years, for the love of food, comfort, all of the above etc. Just because you have a band now doesn't mean you're going to wake up and be perfect. Plus until your band is properly fitted to you, then you're not going to experience the optimal results and like anything worthwhile this takes time. This is a tool to help you but it's still a learning process and we all stumble along the way, so give yourself a break, take a deep breath and pull it together. You'll get there. Rely on your Dr.'s to be your support along the way, if nothing else let this be your motivator to do well so instead of having to go in and feel like you have to justify or explain your choices you and can be proud of them!!

You can do this. Go in for your fill and hold your head high because you're doing just fine!

[ParaGirl 71]

Hey all... I have failed.

I had my operation in July and have had two fills since then. I originally lost weight but have been eating badly the last few months and have put the weight back on. I was scheduled to have another fill but I cancelled it because I was ashamed to face the facts. I told myself I will lose the weight first and then have another fill... I know I need one as I don't feel much restriction at all.

Does anyone have any advice?

I don't need any tough love at the moment to be honest, I feel pretty **** and am so angry at myself

Thanks

I got the band in 2007. I quickly lost 48 pounds, and just as quickly gained every pound back. I kept them for 4 years. Then, I got my head right and decided it was time for ME to do some work myself. I decided to go low carb and started running. (I do not run now due to serious knee injury, but this is about my weight loss).

I lost 80 pounds within 10 months and have kept all but a fluctuation of 10 pounds off. I am currently up about 8-10.

Here is the deal, you will not lose if you look at the band as a way to magically lose weight. I promise, I tried! It is only a tool. I have learned that it's purpose for me to to keep me from feeling hungry. I mean this, I am a BIG eater. I have been known to eat an entire pizza in a sitting, or a half gallon of ice cream inside of a day's time - and Im a girl!!! This is what I do, when you are in a good fill level, this is what will happen to you too: I portion out what I am eating, I always give myself an amount that looks way too little, but tell myself I can have more if I want after I eat. I eat that small amount and find that truly, I would have a difficult time swallowing more down. Then, I am done. I make sure I don't drink for 30 min. or more. I seriously don't get hungry for at least 3 or more hours. This is what the band does for you. Have you noticed the doctor's office always asked the same thing? Are you drinking with your meals? Are you eating Protein first? ARE YOU GETTING HUNGRY BETWEEN MEALS??? Because the feeling of restriction isn't the biggest things, its' the feeling of hunger - or the absence thereof. Get the fills you need, and when you can honestly cut your portions and not be hungry, you are in your green zone. It's not about knowing you will barf if you eat too much.

Now, this is where it gets tricky, if you're like me. I like to eat just for the heck of it. So I have to really say, sure, I want a snickers, but am I even hungry? Asking myself that has gotten me out of many binges. And I am a binger.

I hope you have read my entire post, because honestly, it took me many years after being banded to learn what I needed to learn. I hope you do better than me.

I went from a size 22/24 to a 10 - for for 4 whole years after the band, i was at the highest. I have been a size 10 for 2 years. Even not being able to run hasnt caused me to gain.

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

Hey all... I have failed.

I had my operation in July and have had two fills since then. I originally lost weight but have been eating badly the last few months and have put the weight back on. I was scheduled to have another fill but I cancelled it because I was ashamed to face the facts. I told myself I will lose the weight first and then have another fill... I know I need one as I don't feel much restriction at all.

Does anyone have any advice?

I don't need any tough love at the moment to be honest, I feel pretty **** and am so angry at myself

Thanks

I got the band in 2007. I quickly lost 48 pounds, and just as quickly gained every pound back. I kept them for 4 years. Then, I got my head right and decided it was time for ME to do some work myself. I decided to go low carb and started running. (I do not run now due to serious knee injury, but this is about my weight loss).

I lost 80 pounds within 10 months and have kept all but a fluctuation of 10 pounds off. I am currently up about 8-10.

Here is the deal, you will not lose if you look at the band as a way to magically lose weight. I promise, I tried! It is only a tool. I have learned that it's purpose for me to to keep me from feeling hungry. I mean this, I am a BIG eater. I have been known to eat an entire pizza in a sitting, or a half gallon of ice cream inside of a day's time - and Im a girl!!! This is what I do, when you are in a good fill level, this is what will happen to you too: I portion out what I am eating, I always give myself an amount that looks way too little, but tell myself I can have more if I want after I eat. I eat that small amount and find that truly, I would have a difficult time swallowing more down. Then, I am done. I make sure I don't drink for 30 min. or more. I seriously don't get hungry for at least 3 or more hours. This is what the band does for you. Have you noticed the doctor's office always asked the same thing? Are you drinking with your meals? Are you eating Protein first? ARE YOU GETTING HUNGRY BETWEEN MEALS??? Because the feeling of restriction isn't the biggest things, its' the feeling of hunger - or the absence thereof. Get the fills you need, and when you can honestly cut your portions and not be hungry, you are in your green zone. It's not about knowing you will barf if you eat too much.

Now, this is where it gets tricky, if you're like me. I like to eat just for the heck of it. So I have to really say, sure, I want a snickers, but am I even hungry? Asking myself that has gotten me out of many binges. And I am a binger.

I hope you have read my entire post, because honestly, it took me many years after being banded to learn what I needed to learn. I hope you do better than me.

I went from a size 22/24 to a 10 - for for 4 whole years after the band, i was at the highest. I have been a size 10 for 2 years. Even not being able to run hasnt caused me to gain.

I needed to read this post today. Thank you and congratulations on your long term success.