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My "psychology" of eating....



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I was trying to explain to my mother the other night my psychology of eating and how I think about food. I told her that the FIRST thing I think to myself when I get a plate of food is "Oh God, is this going to be enough or should I order something else too?" And that is no matter HOW much is on the plate....I feel the need when serving myself at home to both cook large amounts (just for me) and put HUGE portions of food on the plate (enough for a very LARGE grown man to eat) and no matter how much I put on my plate, I still wonder if I should put on MORE. She was dumbfounded. She said she had been thinking about that for days and how alien it was to her.. I told her that in addition to this feeling, I also have a HUGE aversion to leaving ANYTHING on my plate. It really causes me extreme angst when I cannot finish a meal and I will do it even if it HURTS. That amazed her too. Especially since she wasn't one of those Moms who said "clean your plate!" when we were growing up. Isn't that weird!

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kacee- Are you sure you are ready to be banded? Hopefully you will not think that way once you are banded. You will not be able to eat a large amount of food and you will find that you leave food on your plate. Maybe you could try using a smaller plate. Best of luck to you! Gigi

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No, I am ready. When my feet are to the fire I can do amazing things. The band will help to reinforce me, but I will be successful. I have baby plates and baby silverware. I may come to the point where I pack my big dishes all away!

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The emotions of food and the odd habits we have are coming out in many posts. On another thread, we were talking about the oddity of how we eat. For me the food cannot touch on the plate. I can only eat one thing at a time. I eat counterclockwise. Nothing runny or soupy can touch anything else on the plate. And here you are talking about volume even before you begin, another oddity that we experience. My thing was to watch the food still left. Will someone get that last piece? What about the one that looks exactly the way I prefer to have mine cooked even though I still have one on my plate? Yeah. Been there and still coping. I can encourage you by saying restriction and that feeling of not being hungry goes a long way.

What team of doctors that came together to develop this band had me in mine! I will be forever thankful.

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And, even after you have the band, old habits are hard to break. I still cook a ton of food because I want to make sure I have enough. I still load my plate up and worry if there will be enough for me to have seconds. And then, I remember, oh yeah, I have my band. I won't be able to eat anywhere near what is on my plate, let alone seconds!

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Kacee, that is so interesting; I have the exact same inner demon. There is NEVER enough food to satisfy my eyes. It comes out in other ways, too--I almost always buy two of everything when I'm shopping at the supermarket, for example.

WITH my band this was the demon that was tamed. It was easy to realize--not just say, but actually believe--that a small amount is enough, and if I needed more it would always be there. Without my band I have no such ability. There is no such thing as enough.

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The band may be the solution you need.....it is very helpful for people who are volume eaters (whereas the RNY is better for people who are sugar addicts). Now that I am several months out and have learned what I can eat and can't, etc. I sometimes overeat - and then I'm punished by the food backing up into my esophagus - that certainly will keep you from doing it again for a long time!! It is an excellent way to 'reprogram' what your mind and body want to do next time you sit down at the table.

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"I sometimes overeat - and then I'm punished by the food backing up into my esophagus - that certainly will keep you from doing it again for a long time!! It is an excellent way to 'reprogram' what your mind and body want to do next time you sit down at the table."

Yep, that's what I am looking for. I learn pretty quickly when I get a "zap" for doing the wrong thing.

Also, for the "quantity problem"....I know when I cook I will still have that....so I went out and bought a FoodSaver so I can vacuum package all my leftovers.

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"The band may be the solution you need.....it is very helpful for people who are volume eaters (whereas the RNY is better for people who are sugar addicts)."

Yep....the more I researched, the more the band seemed perfect for me. I am TOTALLY not a sweets eater....NOR do I like Pasta at all. I think that gives me a head start. My downfall is not so much specific foods...it's just the AMOUNT.

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"I can only eat one thing at a time. I eat counterclockwise."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! You and my first boyfriend!

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Kacee, I could have written the exact same post. I am or should I say was a volume eater. I don't know where I got the idea from but I think it is related to being an emotional eater. My mom also thought I was from another planet and probably still does. hehehehe

Lap Dancer, lol, I do the same thing. I don't like my food to touch, if there's anything saucy on the plate I get really irritated when it runs into other food and I think I eat clockwise but until you brought it up I hadn't really thought about it.

Glad to know that I am not alone and hopefully not too weird! :)

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I was trying to explain to my mother the other night my psychology of eating and how I think about food. I told her that the FIRST thing I think to myself when I get a plate of food is "Oh God, is this going to be enough or should I order something else too?" And that is no matter HOW much is on the plate....I feel the need when serving myself at home to both cook large amounts (just for me) and put HUGE portions of food on the plate (enough for a very LARGE grown man to eat) and no matter how much I put on my plate, I still wonder if I should put on MORE. She was dumbfounded. She said she had been thinking about that for days and how alien it was to her.. I told her that in addition to this feeling, I also have a HUGE aversion to leaving ANYTHING on my plate. It really causes me extreme angst when I cannot finish a meal and I will do it even if it HURTS. That amazed her too. Especially since she wasn't one of those Moms who said "clean your plate!" when we were growing up. Isn't that weird!

Its weird that I got fat because those thoughts are totally alien to me as well. I have never thought like this and I also cannot identify in any way with always being ravenously hungry before banding. I wasnt.

Yet the band has helped me just as much, and I know for sure I couldnt have lost this weight without the band.

For me personally, its because the band has allowed me to "trust" my body implicitly, to know that I can eat what I want to eat and that I wont overeat.

Its why I refuse point blank to count Protein grams, fat grams, calories, follow ANY sort of diet. The very minute I decided I needed to lose weight and go on a diet I would feel a compulsion to start tomorrow and just have one last taste of everything that day. And of course tomorrow never came. So to me the lapband worked instantly, like magic. I was never going to "go on a diet tomorrow" so the compulsion to eat loads of bad foods just disappeared. It was entirely mental, not physical, without a doubt.

At times when I've plateaued out and lately when I seem to have stopped losing for good, thankfully within my healthy weight range, I've resolved to go back to counting Weight Watchers points and what happens? I start pigging out on the wrong foods. I just refuse to do it ever again, but its a hard habit to break.

So I find it very hard to not say negative things when people talk about high Protein diets etc and especially the "rules" you guys get given on how to eat after WLS. To the very core of my being I think its the wrong approach. Its nothing more than another diet, another set of rules doomed to fail, albeit assisted by the band.

Yet I know (before you all go nuts at me, lol) that's just personality dependent. It would fail for ME, it wont necessarily fail for you.

But I'm sure there's some of you that get what I'm saying.

The other thing that I do is use food to relieve stress, I've been eating like a pig the last 2 weeks and not exercising due to the massive stress we've had over decisions on secondary schooling for my oldest son and whether we will have to move etc. Right back into the old habits. I dont tihnk I'll ever break that one, but the band contains it.

it does reduce my appetite somewhat too, I'm sure of it, but I dont have and never have had really good restriction so I'm pretty sure its probably been 75% a mental thing to me.

So my issues are/were probably totally different to yours, but the band will no doubt provide both of us with equal, if different assistance. Good luck, and a bit of self analysis is a very important thing in this journey. You'll probably have a few of those AHA moments along the way.

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Oh, too hard to edit these days.

I just wanted to add that I was a volume eater too in that just out of habit, I routinely ate bigger servings than I needed. But the band helped me easily overcome that. It took about 9 months before I found I was truly serving myself far less and getting used to how much I eat in my mind.

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Jacqui, very interesting post and maybe you're not so different afterall. Yes, I am an emotional eater and have consumed huge portions at meals but also relate to what you are saying. I think you hit the nail right on the head. Part of the issue is overeating and choosing the wrong foods because of being in a perpetual diet cycle. The mindset of having to always start a diet and therefore wanting to eat the "last meal" all the time. Not sure I explained this right but after reading your post I had a lightbulb moment.

I knew after I did my research on the lapband and after my consult with the surgeon that this procedure is EXACTLY what I needed. I didn't want food to control me anymore. I wanted to eat to live not live to eat.

I'm only 10 days postop and still having lots of gas pains and discomfort but there's one thing I know for sure... I have never felt more in control of food since the day I was born! Freedom at last!!:)

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Its why I refuse point blank to count Protein grams, fat grams, calories, follow ANY sort of diet. The very minute I decided I needed to lose weight and go on a diet I would feel a compulsion to start tomorrow and just have one last taste of everything that day. And of course tomorrow never came. So to me the lapband worked instantly, like magic. I was never going to "go on a diet tomorrow" so the compulsion to eat loads of bad foods just disappeared. It was entirely mental, not physical, without a doubt.

This is me, too. I had a thread once about how setting goals for myself just turns into setting traps. Dieting has never worked for me and it is the one sure way I could have sabotaged the band.

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