Lack of attraction

[AR40 88]

Ok, I have lost 50lbs but still feel fat! So..., what's the real problem? I don't feel visible yet, still not noticed. I know, pity party! I just don't know how to feel good about myself...yet advice? Surgery was 5-5/14, starting weight 205...

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

I don't know. But I think that would be a great question to explore with a good counselor.

[laurenella82 625]

I don't know. But I think that would be a great question to explore with a good counselor.

I agree. I'm afraid I may have the same problem. You live do long feeling one way because if your weight then it all changes but your mind hasn't caught up.

Good luck on your journey!

[AR40 88]

It's a strange thing I know, but I'm not sure how I should be feeling now. Never needed the validation before but I seem to need it now...

[AR40 88]

Ugg! Stuff like this was easier when I was heavy

[laurenella82 625]

Did you not need it or not want it? Sometimes I don't want to be noticed. Sometimes I just want to fade into the background. I wasn't like that when I was younger/smaller. I loved the attention then. Not so much not at almost 300 pounds.

Edited November 29, 2014 by laurenella82

[AR40 88]

Always needed it but it seems to matter more now...was this all for nothing?

[laurenella82 625]

It wasn't. It's coming! But validate yourself for now. You see and feel the difference. And at the end of the day this journey is about you. Giving yourself more love, more credit for taking back your health. At some point those around you will see what you already see.

Edited November 29, 2014 by laurenella82

[AR40 88]

Thank you for that. Feeling alone a lot these days. Mostly struggling with myself about where I should be in this journey. No one understands so I have really no one to talk to about this. I really appreciate your support ????

[McButterpants 2,846]

I'm down 75 pounds and sometimes feel like my "old self". I can't explain it. I went shopping the other day and found myself looking for the XXL or plus sizes. I can't explain it.

Also, my first 49 pounds went unnoticed...When I hit exactly 50 pounds, two people said something to me about my weight loss. It was weird. I wondered why no one said anything prior to that? Maybe because I was wearing very loose fitting clothes?

It has taken some getting used to being this small - I haven't been this size in decades. Sometimes when I look at pictures, it's like I'm looking at a stranger. This isn't every day I feel like this and it is getting better. I think we all have an adjustment period to trying to figure out who we are now - my personality has changed, my view of people has changed, my confidence has changed, and obviously, my appearance has changed.

I often wonder if this is what people who have drastic plastic surgery feel like?

I would definitely start a photo journal - that has helped me. I started from the day I decided to have surgery and have continued thru the past year. Seeing the changes in my body and face has been helpful - on those days where I think "nothing's changed", it helps bring me back to reality.

[BitterSweet* 835]

Sometimes we don't realize how big we are but if you started at 205 and have lost 50 lbs, surely you are almost at your goal weight.

The bigger we are, the smaller we tend to feel in this world. When the weight falls off, so does our protective emotional shelter of fat. It will take some time (and maybe some therapy) before how you feel and what you see in the mirror will match each other. When you begin to embrace your amazing change, you'll carry yourself with more confidence, and it will show.

[teshadb 203]

 

See just got married oct 20th ????

[finediva 979]

Always needed it but it seems to matter more now...was this all for nothing?

So you are trying to lose unhealthy pounds to be noticed by others?

[AR40 88]

Teshadb you look great! Congrats to you, keep up the good work!

[AR40 88]

I guess we all do things to be noticed....