Lucky # Sevens- July 07 Bandsters

[Frustrated 1]

She needs to dump her personal trainer. I understand that at times you need a tough motivator. But the role of a motivator is to encourage and inspire you to work harder, not to make you feel like crap. Take Jillian Michaels for instance from Biggest Loser. Now she yells at you like a drill sargeant while you're working out, but she also gives detailed and good advice with regard to diet and stuff when the workout is done. She doesn't highlight what you're doing wrong, she gives you advice on how to make things work better for you.

I think my pouch test went okay. I actually found the liquid days kind of tough to begin with, but easier to tolerate than the food days. I struggled finding things to eat. Most of the time I had to force myself to eat cottage cheese, fish or chicken. I just didn't feel like eating it. It's not that I don't like them, I just didn't want to eat them.

It made me take a good look at my eating habits. I'm not stuffing myself with bad foods, but I'm not always making the right decisions when I do eat either. It was a good eye opener for me. I'm back to regular eating now. As regular as I can be. I know I've got to try and eat more Protein, but I'm glad to be able to get fruits and vegetables back into my diet. If I didn't have a Protein shake that I like so much it would be more of a concern. The pouch test got me back on track again. I think I'll do it every once in a while to reinforce the basic rules of my band. :thumbup:

[IndioGirl55 32]

HEY GANG I AM LOSING IT !!!

I read the post this morning as ususal -but I guess I didn't say good morning ....

Karri - If the med's aren't helping you - then yes get off them and find another,.. OK I guess I am ok with the 1500 calories now that you explained :biggrin2: Doc approved - so mommy approved too...

Candice - I got your's and Linda's in my phone too - Had Phyls' :thumbup:

Steph - Yep I will get nails done this weekend - hair gets done thursday 7/24 - I am ready !!! Still gotta think about what I am taking - Phyll have you packed yet ???

You guy ons on your 5 day pouch test - I am proud of you who are doing it - I couldn't - I could never stand the Protein Shakes - I tried one the other day - ugh - had a few sips and that was it - the smell gets to me..

Yep Ruby it;s all about our choices - some days I may not get all my Protein in but I gotta say most days I am close - some days I want more carbs than others some days I don't feel like veggie - but if you average it all it's working...

I really can use a tweak - but just going to wait til my appointment on 7/31

Ok I gotta get to work = CBL

[Twilight 2]

Hi ladies. Frustrated with my web page. I'm trying to tweak a page from another site and things I'm doing aren't working. I think it's the program I'm trying to use. I'm going to contact one of my directors and see if they will buy me a real one. You get what you pay for, after all. I think I'll find a great background I like for my own pages and call it good for the day. It really is tough going. I didn't think it was going to be so hard for me. I'm so frustrated and then I want to eat my frustrations away.

I've managed to get half the Atkins shake down. I think I might try to make some sort of smoothy with some of my Protein powders I got to try. Anything's gotta be better than that.

As for the pouch test, I thought about it and decided I needed to reconnect. I needed to remember what "full" feels like. I needed to remember the rules better. I figured with this I will be focussing better on the rules. I'm not sure about the food days. I want to add veggies to my chicken salad but not sure if I have to have straight Protein those days and forgo it. That's what it sounds like, but then the recipes have some other stuff in them. Just not sure. There is a pumpkin Soup on there that sounds amazing. I'd never thought of eating pumpkin soup....but I might have to try it.

Okay....enough wasting time. I'll talk to you all later.

[salsa1877 10]

I can't believe I am saying this but I think I am going to get a slight fill when I see the doctor on 8/11. I want a VERY small fill though. I have done a lot of thinking and I have to use a LOT of will power to make sure that I don't eat too much because I don't get the satiety feeling much any more. I figure I paid for this tool I might as well use it. I have to stay loose enough so that I can get enough calories for when I am training, but I would appreciate some help. Something to be there when I need it. Right now my band does VERY little for me.

I have learned a lot about good and proper nutritionm but frankly I am not a big fan of the hunger feelings that I have had for the last couple of days. Right after surgery I had NO appetite...now I could eat the entire kitchen if someone set me loose.

Okay stepped on the scale again today and what do you know...the 2 pounds I "gained" during my doctor prescribed calorie fest are gone. Looks like it was swelling related. NOT good for the brain. Now I have that little angel/devil thing going on in my brain.

Devil - "You ate all that food and didn't gain any weight. You never let yourself go hungry. If you were hungry you just ate and NOTHING happend. Just keep doing that and you will be fine. Not one thing was measured and the world didn't crash"

Angel - "Yeah you ate the food cause you were a week out of surgery and all those calories were needed to HEAL. You aren't going to be healing forever so you had better just get your a$$ back to the way things are supposed to be, get a fill, and deal with the hunger. You have done this for the last 11 months...why would you even think of straying now"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!! Make the voices stop!

My PCP did put me on different meds effective today. She agreed that the meds were probably my biggest problem. Everyone was amazed at my recovery. They couldn't believe that I am only 12 days post op!

[IndioGirl55 32]

I can't believe I am saying this but I think I am going to get a slight fill when I see the doctor on 8/11. I want a VERY small fill though. I have done a lot of thinking and I have to use a LOT of will power to make sure that I don't eat too much because I don't get the satiety feeling much any more. I figure I paid for this tool I might as well use it. I have to stay loose enough so that I can get enough calories for when I am training, but I would appreciate some help. Something to be there when I need it. Right now my band does VERY little for me.

I have learned a lot about good and proper nutritionm but frankly I am not a big fan of the hunger feelings that I have had for the last couple of days. Right after surgery I had NO appetite...now I could eat the entire kitchen if someone set me loose.

Okay stepped on the scale again today and what do you know...the 2 pounds I "gained" during my doctor prescribed calorie fest are gone. Looks like it was swelling related. NOT good for the brain. Now I have that little angel/devil thing going on in my brain.

Devil - "You ate all that food and didn't gain any weight. You never let yourself go hungry. If you were hungry you just ate and NOTHING happend. Just keep doing that and you will be fine. Not one thing was measured and the world didn't crash"

Angel - "Yeah you ate the food cause you were a week out of surgery and all those calories were needed to HEAL. You aren't going to be healing forever so you had better just get your a$$ back to the way things are supposed to be, get a fill, and deal with the hunger. You have done this for the last 11 months...why would you even think of straying now"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!! Make the voices stop!

My PCP did put me on different meds effective today. She agreed that the meds were probably my biggest problem. Everyone was amazed at my recovery. They couldn't believe that I am only 12 days post op!

I am right there with ya sister -- I am hungry often - but I am still hungry even when I am full - but you are like me ya you ate - but you didn't eat junk... You are healthy food.

If fills keep you from getting hungry go for it.... I don't remember if mine did - I know that I am hungry more often than not... I just don't eat or if I do it's watermelon - sf pudding - popcorn - extra veggies - no junk

and yes you are amazing 12 and you look fab!!!

[peaches9 3]

Karri; Congrats on the photo - you look amazing - and not just because you are tinier... your SMILE is a dead give-a-way!!! You look deliriously HAPPY! Good on ya!

I am a tad concerned though (second band mommy chimming in here) about the 2 lbs and up and down... why are you torturing yourself while you are still in surgical recovery time??? Stay off the darn scale, its driving you nutty. JMHO :embaressed_smile:

Steph, good for you making it to your support group and getting another fill. and teh Weight loss was great too! It was betteer than you expected eh???

Phyl; I started out on the POUCH TEST day #1 today... Had 2 shakes, then mid aft. I was starving... and I acquiesed to some MEAT... but tonight I am back on Creamed pea soup!!!! I will be back on tomorrow for sure... I think because of the extra wine/food while at teh camp I was extra hungry today.... but still I came in below 1200 cals. today... So that is an accomplishment for me!!!

7 more sleeps until I leave for the Mall of America trip - Yippee!!

[IndioGirl55 32]

Karri; Congrats on the photo - you look amazing - and not just because you are tinier... your SMILE is a dead give-a-way!!! You look deliriously HAPPY! Good on ya!

I am a tad concerned though (second band mommy chimming in here) about the 2 lbs and up and down... why are you torturing yourself while you are still in surgical recovery time??? Stay off the darn scale, its driving you nutty. JMHO

Steph, good for you making it to your support group and getting another fill. and teh Weight loss was great too! It was betteer than you expected eh???

Phyl; I started out on the POUCH TEST day #1 today... Had 2 shakes, then mid aft. I was starving... and I acquiesed to some MEAT... but tonight I am back on Creamed pea soup!!!! I will be back on tomorrow for sure... I think because of the extra wine/food while at teh camp I was extra hungry today.... but still I came in below 1200 cals. today... So that is an accomplishment for me!!!

7 more sleeps until I leave for the Mall of America trip - Yippee!!

Yep I am excited too :w00t:- just got my new camera - gotta figure out how to work it :huh2: - the battery is charging - I am going to go read the book but who know's how much I will remember -:embaressed_smile: Phyl bringing her laptop laptop so we can post during the weekend.. Oh that means I gotta bring my ubs cord - stupid me...

We got everyones' number steph phyl you me linda in our phones - remember to bring your chargers. I gotta ck the weather - when I looked the other day it said 84 - and that's cool for me - but someone said it will be humid

Ok off to read my book and take my fish out - I really should get a fill before we go - but I don't want to be too tight and it can take a day or 2 for the fill to settle - so I will just have to bite the bullet and accept whatever weight gain I have when I go tothe docs after our trip - his scale has me 4-5 lbs heavier than mine - but his doesn't count only mine does

[salsa1877 10]

Wow...2 mommies...Too much excitement! Actually I have to step on the scale...doctors orders. We have to make sure that I don't drop too low. Both doctors are afraid that I am going to lose too much weight. PS gave me the okay to go to 1500 but if I start losing weight...UP UP UP they go.

Yes the band did stop me from being hungry. I honestly didn't have much hunger for the entire time I let the band work for me. I ate when I was supposed to. I am not like Janet and can go for long periods of time without eating during the day. I am used to pretty regualar meal times. I just am not staying full for very long at all.

Thanks for the compliments! You are right Peaches I am very happy! Last night I was looking at that picture and the first thought that came to my head was "Wow...you have done so much this year". It wasn't "wow look how much weight I have lost". Shedding the pounds has opened me up to do and be so much more. I feel fantastic. I will feel better when DH gets dinner done though...I'm hungry!

[Twilight 2]

Thanks for the compliments! You are right Peaches I am very happy! Last night I was looking at that picture and the first thought that came to my head was "Wow...you have done so much this year". It wasn't "wow look how much weight I have lost". Shedding the pounds has opened me up to do and be so much more. I feel fantastic. I will feel better when DH gets dinner done though...I'm hungry!

Actually the pics that I thought said more about how far you've come are the ones of you running your marathon. Look at those legs and arms. You may have a very shapely waist now but you can't hide the muscles you have developed.

Jai wants me so I had better go 4 a bit. Later ladies

[Frustrated 1]

I can't believe I am saying this but I think I am going to get a slight fill when I see the doctor on 8/11. I want a VERY small fill though.

I can't believe you're saying that either. :confused2: It concerns me. On the one hand you're struggling to get all your calories in and are continuing to lose weight when you should at the very least be maintaining. On the other hand you're worried that you're hungry too soon after eating.

I wish that you weren't so obsessed with food. It isn't healthy. :embaressed_smile: You have to look at the end goal here and realise there needs to be a point in time when you're not a prisoner to food. You still very much are.

Yes, your band is a tool that needs to be used, but remember what it is used for. It's a weight loss tool, not an appetite control tool. It's never been a brain band. That's the biggest complaint of most of us. If we could band our heads it would make it so much easier.

Look at what's triggering your hunger. Is it boredom? Change of routine? Are you more susceptible to hunger at certain times? Hormones? There are so many triggers. I know I have several. The hard part is learning how to react to these triggers. Try to make changes there instead.

If you look at the logistics, you don't need a fill. You're already under your goal weight and continuing to lose. What would it accomplish other than further weight loss?

[IndioGirl55 32]

I can't believe you're saying that either. :confused2: It concerns me. On the one hand you're struggling to get all your calories in and are continuing to lose weight when you should at the very least be maintaining. On the other hand you're worried that you're hungry too soon after eating.

I wish that you weren't so obsessed with food. It isn't healthy. :embaressed_smile: You have to look at the end goal here and realise there needs to be a point in time when you're not a prisoner to food. You still very much are.

Yes, your band is a tool that needs to be used, but remember what it is used for. It's a weight loss tool, not an appetite control tool. It's never been a brain band. That's the biggest complaint of most of us. If we could band our heads it would make it so much easier.

Look at what's triggering your hunger. Is it boredom? Change of routine? Are you more susceptible to hunger at certain times? Hormones? There are so many triggers. I know I have several. The hard part is learning how to react to these triggers. Try to make changes there instead.

If you look at the logistics, you don't need a fill. You're already under your goal weight and continuing to lose. What would it accomplish other than further weight loss?

Ruby

I have to disagree with a bit that you said - the band is more than a weight loss tool - it's a maintenance tool too - to control our portions, keep us fuller for a longer period of time and for some it does seem to help with hunger - but I think that's about how long it takes the hard Protein to go thru the band. That's why it's permanent and not taken out after losing the weight - that's why I got banded to keep the weight off permanently not just the weight loss issue.

When I went to that meeting in Vegas - one thing I really noticed was the other pple's personalities - most were total control freaks - I really mean this - I think our issues with food is about control - I controlled how much I ate and what I ate - we say it's lack of control - but really it isn't we planned we plotted we thought about food 24/7- just as much as I control it now but it's the opposite now - I plan - I think about food - some days I miss it terribly - today's my son's Bday - I want choc cake - I want tons of frosting and some ice cream -(thankfully they aren't here or I would be eating it) I want unhealthy food and if I go down that road - it could be the point of no return - I am at goal - and I could easily slip back into old habits - my band as loosen and I do not stay full for more that 1/2 hr - I need a tweak - are you saying that cuz I am at goal that I don't need to keep the maintenance up on my band - it's barely a year - yep I have done really good - but i have had the help of this thing inside me.. and without it I know that I would not be where I am today without it...

The devil vs angel is testing Karri (Karri I'm not talking like you aren't in the room) and that little devil is telling her ok just a bite here and there she is eating more often than her 3 meals and adding Snacks - nuts are calling her name - she is unfilled - yes she has a little restriction but not much - she wants to use her tool - She's afraid of giving up her control cuz if she does she will go back down that dark road of obesity...

Just cuz we are at goal - have had plastic surgery doesn't mean that we can't get fat again... I think it's ok to get a tweak so that she gets that full feeling - I eat til I am physically full and still want to eat - you don't know how bad it is for me at night - - That's why I eat popcorn - it gives me the hand to mouth feeling and keeps me ok -

Karri mentions that I go long period of time with out eating - not really just on the weekends when I am busy doing stuff - but at work and home doing nothing - I eat 3 meals and watch the clock for Breakfast and lunch and yep time between lunch & dinner is a bit long but if I ate my snacks in the afternoon - I wouldn't have any room in my food budget for my night time snacks - and if I didn't work it the way I do - I wouldn't be where I am - we have to modify stuff to work for us.

I know that I don't have a healthy mental state when it comes to food I haven't beaten my addiction - right now it's under control but tomorrow that control could be gone..

I agree she doesn't need to worry right now - but I totally get the fear and we all know that she is the biggest control person on our board and I forgot want the actual name of her condition is - but I can tell you that if she loses anymore weight she will do what she has too to get it back on

and yes she still has issues concerning food - but so do I -

I know you say that you feel you have control over it now - I am glad for you - but I don't I really don't feel that way about me - I don't need to lose any more weight (well I would love 5 lbs) but I am going to get a fill when I go back the end of this month just a tweak really .02- cuz I know that I can keep pushing the limits and eat more - I got my band to stop me from doing that.

My concern from day one has always been 5 yrs from now - not the 1st yr or the second year - I can keep the weight down for that long - but it's after that 2nd yr where it starts creeping back on.

Hugs !!! Honest discussion here about food issues - healthy & unhealthy

and you know from my heart it's not meant to piss you off or start a fight

(omw I am paranoid from what I see on other threads aren't I - I know that you will understand what I am trying to say)

[Twilight 2]

I failed miserably!!! I couldn't hack it. I HAD to eat. I was having serious tummy problems and nothing was helping. Finally, I ate some chicken that I was feeding Jai, and then spiraled. I then had a couple bites of her toast, and finally had to do something to "fill" the hole that seemed to appear out of nowhere so I ate a bowl of Kashi go lean oatmeal. Now I'm satisfied and don't think I could eat anything more. I guess it wasn't too bad. I made it about a day and a half instead of the two days if you count most of yesterday.

I will try to do liquids one more day but tomorrow night will have another bowl of Protein rich oatmeal so that I don't binge on the pizza that I know will be difficult for me.

Kudos to those of you who could do the 2 full days of liquids. I just didn't have the will power! I am very disgruntled at myself, but know that being too hard on myself would be counter productive.

My tummy issues seem to have cleared. I don't know if some of that is psychosomatic. I would guess it is, but the Fiber couldn't have hurt.

I'll talk to you all later ladies. Have a good night. Oh....btw....I think I found a background and font of my main pages that works. If any of you have any suggestions, please let me know. Or if there are any glitches. I think all links are working right now. Thanks for your help everyone.

[Twilight 2]

Janet, I understand what you are saying. I understand what Ruby is saying. I think you both have valid points. However, whatever we think doesn't change how Karri feels.

My heart hurts for you Karri, because I want you to feel so good and you are still struggling with these demons. I know that a lot of that struggle would be relieved if you weren't sitting around healing all day every day....and if you could sleep. I wish there was something I could give you to keep your head busy so you would dive into it instead of delving into your weight loss and frustrating yourself. You need to get busy....doing something....I don't know what it would be, but you need to get deep involved in it. What about planning some new projects for your classes next fall. Design the powerpoints, and the worksheets, and the lesson plans. I would publish them on my website if you would like. You have time to do the research and dig for different resources. Even if you don't do the lessons, you could write some great ones for others. What about lessons you wish math teachers would teach the students before you get them. Use that obsessive personality to tweak them until they are perfect. I would suggest taking an online course but know that money is tight and probably not possible right now. I've been thinking but coming up blank.

Karri, I think we are worried that you are so successful and we are so proud of you and in awe of your power, and yet it seems like you are still obsessing. It is very hard for us to wrap our head around. Sort of like when we were so so so heavy and a "skinny" we would be talking to would be obsessing over 5 or 10 pounds....it just didn't compute for us. We want you to be happy. I think you really are. That smile on your face last night didn't lie. You worry out loud here and I'm glad you do, because keeping it inside would be so horrible. It just is hard for us not to worry too.

Hugs to you Karri. I'm sure you will do exactly what you need to do for you. You will make the right choices. Let us support you however we can. Love to you.

[salsa1877 10]

I can't believe you're saying that either. :confused2: It concerns me. On the one hand you're struggling to get all your calories in and are continuing to lose weight when you should at the very least be maintaining. On the other hand you're worried that you're hungry too soon after eating.

I wish that you weren't so obsessed with food. It isn't healthy. :frown: You have to look at the end goal here and realise there needs to be a point in time when you're not a prisoner to food. You still very much are.

Yes, your band is a tool that needs to be used, but remember what it is used for. It's a weight loss tool, not an appetite control tool. It's never been a brain band. That's the biggest complaint of most of us. If we could band our heads it would make it so much easier.

Look at what's triggering your hunger. Is it boredom? Change of routine? Are you more susceptible to hunger at certain times? Hormones? There are so many triggers. I know I have several. The hard part is learning how to react to these triggers. Try to make changes there instead.

If you look at the logistics, you don't need a fill. You're already under your goal weight and continuing to lose. What would it accomplish other than further weight loss?

It has always been my belief that the band was more than just a weight loss tool...it was the tool that was going to help us keep the weight off.

[Frustrated 1]

I know you say that you feel you have control over it now - I am glad for you - but I don't I really don't feel that way about me - I don't need to lose any more weight (well I would love 5 lbs) but I am going to get a fill when I go back the end of this month just a tweak really .02- cuz I know that I can keep pushing the limits and eat more - I got my band to stop me from doing that.

My concern from day one has always been 5 yrs from now - not the 1st yr or the second year - I can keep the weight down for that long - but it's after that 2nd yr where it starts creeping back on.

Hugs !!! Honest discussion here about food issues - healthy & unhealthy

and you know from my heart it's not meant to piss you off or start a fight

(omw I am paranoid from what I see on other threads aren't I - I know that you will understand what I am trying to say)

No I know this discussion isn't to start a fight or anything. I think it's good that we can talk from our hearts here and know that it's not a personal attack.

The reason I feel I have control over my food issues is actually due to Karri. Watching her go through this journey and fight damn hard for every pound she has lost has been both inspiring and worrying. She spurs me on to do well each day, but she's also worried me when she's continued to exercise when she's injured, cried when she's looked at restaurant menus, had to deal with moron doctors, passed out in the bath tub, and on top of it all is forever worried about every single thing that goes in her body.

It is a control thing. But our bands are there to control our intake physically. We still have to do the mental work on our own. If getting a small fill will give her the mental support she needs, then that's one thing. But she'll also continue to lose weight unless she increases her intake of calories. The fill is supposed to DEcrease your intake. When we feel hungry we need to ask ourselves if we are physically hungry or mentally hungry. You mention yourself that you still want to eat even when you're full. So that's mental hunger. Your band only stops you physically. When we're hungry we have to ask ourselves why. Is it a physical need, an emotional need, a mental need or a habitual need that wants to be fulfilled?

Speaking about control; I was in an abusive relationship for over 20 years. The only thing I had control over was what I ate. I was told what to wear, what to do, when to do it, what to think, when to think it, when to do nothing, what to say..... ad infinitum. The only reason I got out of that trap was because my partner was physically removed (imprisoned). Otherwise there's a good chance I would still be there. Or dead.

I worked hard at gaining back my mental and emotional control after that relationship, and watching people like Karri work so hard to maintain control reminds me of the work I had to put in to gain that emotional freedom even after I was physically free. l promised myself that I would never allow myself to be controlled again. I only realised in the past few months that food was controlling me and I needed to put a stop to it.

At the end of the day she needs to find what works for her. And I support her in her decision making. But it doesn't stop me worrying about her and voicing that concern. :frown: