My Journey - the beginning

[AmandaPal 19]

My name is Amanda and I am 26. It's all moved rather quickly. However the most beneficial has been the pre op class and psychologist visits. My biggest hurdle is myself. I really gave up on myself when I hit 300lbs. It made me feel like a failure. My weight and inability to conquer it frustrates me very much. I'm quite the perfectionist and have trouble not beating myself up or recognizing small successes. So after my last visit with the psychologist, I bought stickers and behavior charts to chart my progress. I made small goals like "start chewing food 30x," "stop drinking 30 min before meals" etc. In order to establish better habits before surgery. They are small and the stickers are a bit silly but I know I need to take a step back and recognize that I need to change along with the surgery.

Of course I cleaned my apartment and lost my new cookbook that has recipes for post surgery...oh dear. One of my goals is to start trying those meals and shopping smarter.

Learning positive self-talk and moving slowly along. I'll get there.

[Beni 1,484]

My dear friend, you are suffering from a disease. It's called obesity. Your cure is not stop eating too much any more then stating, the problem with drunks is they should stop drinking, or patients in need of quadruple bypass patients should watch their diet and exercise. I know I am being cheeky. However, I think it's important to wonder why so many obese individuals fail to realize they have a disease? Myself included for many years. If we could control it, wouldn't we have done so long ago? You and I need help. We can't perform our own quadruple bypasses because we don't know how. We wish we could. What kind of help do we need? Depends on the patient, of course.

We have to use all our might to figure out what might work for us. It may very well be surgery, or not. We owe it to ourselves to figure it out and try because the alternative is devastating.

Best luck on your journey

[AmandaPal 19]

Thank you! As someone who expects to excel at everything I do, it's been hard for me to recognize obesity as a disease and weight loss as something I can't "win" at despite trying over and over again. I am fully aware this is a ridiculous attitude but sometimes my biggest hurdle is myself. That's why I'm starting with small goals that I know I need to start now in order to achieve the best results. Thanks so much for your response!

Edited October 3, 2014 by amandac07