Making the decision too quickly?

[FrankyG 1,450]

Sort of an introduction, and sort of a "what the @#! am I getting into" type of post. So hi, I'm Frankie, or FG if you'd prefer.

I've been fat for almost 20 years at this point, but it's just the last 10 or so where I'm really starting to notice it affecting my life. Last two years, I've been experiencing more health issues (aches and pains, stiffness, swollen feet and limited stamina) along with crushing fatigue. I had thought "maybe one of these days" about having some form of bariatric surgery, but in the last month, I decided that it was time, made the consult appointment and scheduled the sleeve surgery for Oct. 30th December 18 (had a scheduling conflict).

But there is a part of me that wonders if maybe I'm rushing into something I'm ill prepared for mentally.

My husband is fine with it, but I do wonder if he's really just telling me what he thinks I want to hear (he says he isn't, but he has a history of doing this). So we'll be talking more over the next couple of weeks to see if we're both on the same page. I do know when I talked to him today (after my scheduling appointment) and told him when the surgery was scheduled, he said that was "really fast" and seemed surprised, but I'd been telling him I was thinking of trying to get it done the last week of October or first part of November when I first started doing some reading on all of this (so it's been several weeks to get adjusted to the idea).

I am going to have to self-pay as my workplace specifically excluded the bariatric coverage (even though my insurance company usually included coverage, darn it!). My surgery will cost somewhere around $16K once all the bits and pieces get added up (if there is a hernia, then closer to $14K - so here's hoping for a hernia!) and that is a huge amount of money to just... spend like this. But I keep telling myself that it is for my health and so I don't end up sick and crippled in 20-30 years or sooner.

I know I will need to work on my eating habits, my exercise, and have a serious mental adjustment to how and what I eat going forward. I kind of suck when it comes to willpower, but I figure one of the biggest obstacles for me is that I get a ravenous hunger sometimes that should be much more controlled since the ghrelin/hunger hormone is getting drastically reduced by the removal of most of the stomach. The other major issue I have is Portion Control, and the sleeve should definitely help with that part.

I have over 100+ pounds to lose if I want to be a somewhat normal weight, and I would love to get back to being able to ride horses, bike and swim without feeling awkward and ungainly. I would like to look a bit better too, but the main thing for me is mostly wanting to get my range of motion back, stop hurting and enjoy life again. My mother is in her 70s and morbidly obese, and has a ton of major health issues now... and all she does is sit and watch television and read and keep getting more and more feeble, helpless and sick. I don't want that kind of life for myself.

I am not scared in the least about having the actual surgery or any pain. I've had my gallbladder out and it's basically the same type of surgery and I was fine after a few days. High pain threshold, no serious illnesses (yet) and doctor said I'm a great candidate and he'd be surprised if I didn't lose much more than the average of 70% of my excess weight. But I'm a bit worried that I'll not get decent results no matter what I try.

So has anyone else just made the decision and gone from the consult to surgery within a month or two? Anything to think about or other stuff that I should know?

(I have been lurking around here for the last month, and have learned so much!)

Edited October 1, 2014 by FrankiesGirl

[IcanMakeit 1,318]

"So has anyone else just made the decision and gone from the consult to surgery within a month or two?" (Raises hand.) I did exactly that. I started dieting on my own at the beginning of this year and really had a lot of success. I was feeling pretty good about it until I thought back to the last time I dieted seriously. I lost over 120 lbs and then proceeded to gain it all back after only a couple of years. That's when I reconsidered weight loss surgery. I had thought about it years ago, but decided it was too drastic a step for me. But with the realization that all of my weight loss might be undone after a few months or years of success, I changed my mind. I went from that "ah ha" moment to being post-op all in 2 1/2 months.

I am only 4 1/2 months out now so it's too soon to say that I'm a success. But I do feel strongly that this tool is going to make a difference when I reach maintenance. It's helping me to develop better habits: I have gotten used to eating small portions, and then waiting to see if I am still hungry; I'm working on slowing down when I eat; and I make sure that the food I put in my mouth is nutrient dense rather than empty calories. I have also returned to logging all my food and exercise. (And I exercise! I never did much of that before with any regularity.) These changes give me confidence that I will continue to enjoy my new healthy lifestyle in the coming years, so I think that even though I made a snap decision, I made the right decision.

Edited September 26, 2014 by IcanMakeit

[JDD713 15]

i started researching and consultations in August and now i am scheduled for surgery on Oct 6th. (self pay as well). the handful of people that know what i have been looking into and what i am doing are also telling me OMGSH SO SOON??!!! well yeah, WHY WAIT? im ready now ........ its them who must not be ready. my hubby is supporting me but is also uneasy about the whole thing but he has no idea about the whole process and the actual procedure so hes like --ok i guess.

[NotGoingThere 19]

I first met with surgeon at the end of July and getting sleeved tomorrow. Once I made up my mind (after thinking about it for years), I was ready to go!

[ma3 7]

I wish!! My first consult with the Bariatric clinic was June 30th. They made me jump the hoops of NUT, psych, sleep study, and blood work - all before I could even get an appointment with the surgeon. I do understand the reasoning behind it all so that I will be successful. However, the wait time just to get into these appointments has been long and frustrating! I'm now "penciled" in for October 13th as long as my insurance approval gets back by then. I'm told that my process was quick. LOL From some of the posts here, I would agree with that.

I have no worries about my insurance approval as we are self-funded and I meet all the criteria. Just tired of waiting. I can hardly wait - the anticipation is killing me.

[MichiganChic 3,262]

I toyed with idea for years, even considered seriously once (went to see a surgeon), and backed out. This time, I just thought I should do something about my weight as it was really affecting my life for the first time. I saw others succeed with WLS, and started to think it might actually work for me, too. I went to a seminar and had my surgery within 2 months. Once I made up my mind, I was good with it. Haven't regretted it.

[Alfie 58]

I am just going to my first "evaluation" on October 1st in a few days. I am banded since 2008 and have not been terribly successful with it. For that reason, I am scared of failure. I mean I know I'd be much heavier if it had not been for the band but at the same time, I've had my share of issues with it. Hoping I won't have to wait too long. I already know my insurance will go through as I spoke with them. So I'm thinkin I will be possibly sleeved before the end of the year or maybe the beginning of the 2015. I suppose I'll know more on October 1

[Alfie 58]

I toyed with idea for years, even considered seriously once (went to see a surgeon), and backed out. This time, I just thought I should do something about my weight as it was really affecting my life for the first time. I saw others succeed with WLS, and started to think it might actually work for me, too. I went to a seminar and had my surgery within 2 months. Once I made up my mind, I was good with it. Haven't regretted it.

wow you're doing great MC. Good for you!!

[Cody's mom 247]

You have a decission to make, what is more important: your life with food, or your life to live? If you'd rather eat and let life pass you by, then by all means continue what you're doing, if you want to enjoy life and live again, do what is going to get you to where you want to be. Sounds pretty easy to me. Personally I wanted to live life, and enjoy it, not hide and be ashamed. Just my opinion (I was sleeved on Sept 14, 2014).

[Alfie 58]

I first met with surgeon at the end of July and getting sleeved tomorrow. Once I made up my mind (after thinking about it for years), I was ready to go!

all the best to you on your surgery tomorrow. And I wish you a speedy recovery!!

[lakishrivera123 22]

I wish mine was that fast I had to wait 6 month with all the different evaluations. Now I'm 9 months out and 2lbs away from 100lbs down. Wishing you the best of luck.

[FrankyG 1,450]

Nice to see there are some that have done this in a shorter timeframe and are doing well. I guess I'm still going to be a bit worried but I think the decision is the right one.

[chasingpolaris321 214]

I made my decision to have surgery very quickly and haven't regretted it for one minute. I think my situation was somewhat unusual because I had a lot of the requirements taken care of without even realizing it. I had been on a medically supervised diet for a year and hadn't even considered surgery during that time, and had a very quick insurance approval process (I literally gathered all the documentation needed the same week I went to an information session and was approved in two days). My info session was on 7/9, surgeon consult was 7/10, and I had surgery on 8/12.

My point is that I think where you are mental preparedness wise is a lot more complex than just the length of time in between making a decision and having surgery. For me, I was able to take a significant portion of time during that period to understand everything about the surgery and prepare for what was to come afterwards. I think that process is very different depending on who you are. I had some complications and was pretty miserable for the three weeks after surgery, but I knew that it was short term and that most people have a hard time in one way in that first period of time. There was never a feeling of regret. From reading on this forum and talking to other people who have had the sleeve, it seems that if you can picture the surgery not going well (complications, difficulties managing cravings, struggling with eating in moderation, finding exercise overwhelming), and you still want to have it, then you are more likely to succeed. At least some of those things come up for everyone! It seems like the people who are less prepared are the ones that expect to lose a million pounds every day and who imagine that this path is a quick fix. I would analyze how I felt about those factors as a better gauge of how ready I was rather than focusing on how fast you decided to have surgery. Long term weight management is still going to be a battle with surgery, but it's one you can win if you focus on the mental as much as the physical.

Good luck no matter what you decide and I think you will find lots of support on this site

[ochiatl 24]

Hi Frankie. I think my decision was made quickly and I don't regret it one bit. At the end of August I contacted Belite just to get some info and within a couple of days I bought my tickets to TMexico. I had my surgery on Sept 12th and would have had it soon if I didn't want to save a little money on airfare. It was the best decision I've made for my health. I was self pay too which is why I chose to go medtour to save funds. I hope you feel the same happiness I feel now that I see that scale moving!!!

[FrankyG 1,450]

Thanks everyone for your stories!

I did have to switch my surgery date to December due to work scheduling (aaaaah!) but I'm still getting this done this year, and found out I have more vacation time than I thought, so I will be basically off the last part of the month to recover. I figure that's a win!