plastic surgeon. Just going to say it!

[haleytrim 244]

Sweet Lady,

It sounds like this guy is not up to the challenge. My advice is to move on to a better doctor. One who will listen to what you have been through and will understand your need to be comfortable in your new self. Keep researching and asking questions. Know that you are a special person and deserving of all the consideration and compassion that your struggles have warranted. Prayers for financial blessings that you need and that your heart will be healed from the hurt you have suffered.

I don't begrudge anything I have done or what I have done for others. Here or anywhere else. I was just so taken back by it all and the pain was the worst I have ever felt and that includes being abused about being obese in the past.

I have to wait as he is not for me that is sure. I just was really really looking forward to this part. Where you know ( your gonna make it after all ) feeling. It is hard to explain.

Since 2000 my life has been on a down hill spiral and I was so excited to get to this place finally. And like everything else I will have to fight, fight and fight some more to get it done.

You know I may never be able to ride a bike, a horse, go kayaking, travel more then 3 hours by car. Go skating or hiking so many things are on hold and may never get fixed. I found that out on Tuesday, Wed. I found out that my ulcer has healed and then Thursday I got this news. 1 out of 3 is not good odds.

[DeanieG 49]

I read somewhere that it's important to keep a record of times that you have to visit your doctor for problems caused from the excess skin after you've lost a lot of weight. This proves to the insurance company that it's medically necessary and should be covered. I'm scheduled for surgery in November and I hope to lose a lot of weight so I'm sure that I'll have tons of extra skin. I'm going to make sure to keep good records in case I should need plastic surgery.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

Was this guy recommended by your bariatric surgeon?? Our office has a plastic surgeon on staff! I would find one that is connected to a bariatric center.

Yes he is part of the team that has been put together.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

RJ, that just sucks.

I hope when you've gotten your breath back that you can find another path to your goal.

But in the meantime, it's got to be tough.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

RJ, that just sucks.

I hope when you've gotten your breath back that you can find another path to your goal.

But in the meantime, it's got to be tough.

I can barely stand it all! Thank you!

[Eclectick 129]

@GummyTummy your response hit home with me, very well written. I think that when people try to read something they perceive it in different ways because of what personal demons they are fighting which could hinder the true meaning.

We all need to vent sometimes and sometimes when people don't respond the way we want them to..we sometimes can take it as an attack..which essentially it isn't. 2-3 weeks or even a year from now...when things are going good...re-read the post...and can guarantee we will see it differently than now.

[Georgia 2,908]

RK, you definitely have had an awful road with all the complications you have experienced. Life threatening, horrendous things that most of us has not had to deal with. Emotionally you have to be exhausted and I can understand how you had just turned to corner, so to speak, with all of it.

Don't give up. I have very good pals on BP who have said Exactly the same thing about going to Plastics the first time. And some never went back. Others found new doctors and were able to go forward. I believe you will find someone with compassion and understanding for what YOU want to deal with. Maybe somebody recommended by your WLS who has experience with WLS patients more.

You WILL be okay and have a good life I believe. Thinking and praying for you.

[Miss Mac 6,262]

Oh RJ, I am so sorry that a** was so cruel to you. Check out this website:

http://www.bariatricgirl.com/2014/05/what-wlsfa-org-is-all-about-saving-lives-one-grant-at-a-time/

and see if these folks can help you with a grant for the surgery you need. They help with plastics as well as bariatric surgery. It would be worth having to tell your story one more time. I know that eventually a person gets tired of being strong. I wish you were my neighbor so that I could come over and give you a big hug.

[KarenF1972 78]

Hi RJ, What about telling your story on something like gofundme.com? People are able to donate money to you to help with what you need. I know people that were able to raise money to cover things that are not nearly as important as your needs. Good luck!

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

Thank you guys for your encouragement. It was not about the money. It was about how he looked at me and how he kept putting the dollar first. Not to mention that I knew I looked bad but not that bad. I felt so horrible after that experience. But am not looking for charity. I just wondered if anyone ever had the same experience. My heart beats fast when I think about how humiliated I was and still feel.....It was one of the worst things I have ever endured.....I will never forget it! I really won't.

It is just another thing in a long line of disasters for me through this!

[finediva 979]

Yes he is part of the team that has been put together.

Then he MUST have seem patients who had lost a lot of weight before. Or are you the first one? Confusing, if he's part of the team. Then he should not be shocked or repulsed by lots of excess skin.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

Then he MUST have seem patients who had lost a lot of weight before. Or are you the first one? Confusing, if he's part of the team. Then he should not be shocked or repulsed by lots of excess skin.

When I talked to the nurse today and told her what happened she said that he really was not part of the team he was just another plastics that had been used. She also said that others had come back to the office after seeing him in tears because of how they were treated by him.

I wanted to cancel my appointment with him but my hubby said " No lets get his opinion and then try another" I had his alright.......

The nurse was going to talk to my surgeon I have no idea what will happen next...Except I will not be using him that is for sure. I served my time of people looking at me like I did not deserve to walk on the same ground as them...... It just really hurts and the sting has not left me yet. It will though I always push through!

Edited September 27, 2014 by RJ'S/beginning

[playlikeworldchamps 595]

Remember "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

-Eleanor Roosevelt

Don't give that asswipe the power to upset you. You find someone who you can feel comfortable with. Find someone who will advocate for you.

And alternatively many people on here have had great success in Mexico. Don't give up!

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

RJ, I'm sending you a hug long distance. Don't let that a-hole get you down. Of course it affected you. You were literally stripped of all of your defenses and being analyzed by a boor.

I know you won't give up and I know you'll prevail. What I would do, but it's just me, is call ahead before the next appointment even though it will be a different surgeon. I would tell the people on the other end about this event and that you want them to know how horrible that treatment was for you and ask what kind of manner the new doctor has. It doesn't hurt to put people on notice. I would even ask them to relay the information to the surgeon before you arrive.

I know this sounds odd, but why? If we take care of our emotional selves as well as our physical selves, that is a good thing. Would you let your mother or your daughter receive bad treatment if you could prevent it? Nope. So throw that out there and make the new surgeon think twice before being callous or dismissive or worse, cruel, like that first ass.

I'm sorry about your plumbing problems. What a s****y week.

[Pkdvm 175]

RJ-

I know that I don't really know you, but I have a great deal of respect for the advice and support that you so freely give to those of us who are also on this site. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry that this unprofessional PS made you feel humiliated and upset. He is obviously someone who you would not entrust with your medical care, and he has no business reacting in anything but a informative, compassionate way.

You are a brave soul who has had much to deal with. I'm so sorry that this happened to you.