Having a Drama *King* Moment! :-)

[fatblasting 30]

Tonight, I had a little pity party, not a big one, just little bitty tiny one.

I haven't been losing anymore weight and when I see how well all of you are doing, let me just say it, I'm jealous. A healthy jealousy of course, but non the less, I am red in the face for the same success you all are achieving.

Let me first say, I am not so in denial that I will sit here and say, "I'm not sure why I am not losing more weight", because I know why, but I just feel so super discouraged. The fact that I am 4 months out and haven't lost more weight and that I have developed bad eating habits again, is horrible. I feel like I have jacked my sleeve up and there's no going back.

It all started off wrong, my girlfriend, who I love dearly, is also a bariatric patient, but she doesn't eat like one, and since she had the bypass she can get away with cheating since her body is malabsorbing, plus she's lost 125lbs, so she's pretty content with her weight. It all really sucks because I try not to be difficult and just eat what she eats. But I am growing significantly discouraged with my weight loss.

Unfortunately the environment that I'm in, is full of sweets, carbs, more carbs, and did I mention carbs. I eat/drink my 80-100 grams of Protein daily, but I also eat 50-100 grams of carbs daily too.

How I got on this road is from having this issue with my throat, the only thing, at the time, that went down and didn't feel like it further damaged my throat was Soups, crackers, and other carbs. I also started back drinking at the same time because I felt like food was getting caught in my throat.

The crazy thing, I'm not over eating (at-least I think) because I track all my calories, I'm at like 800 to 1300 calories per day.

The day of surgery (06/24/14) I was 526lbs, today I weigh 479lbs. I haven't lost any weight this month.

I don't know where to restart. I don't feel bad for myself; I just want your help, your direction, and your guidance!

Any advice? How do change my diet and habits? Any suggested meal plans?

Edited September 21, 2014 by fatblasting

[MichiganChic 3,262]

If you are being honest with yourself about what you are eating, then just do what you know you should. There is no secret, and no magic bullet. The key is to be honest with yourself. I'm not saying you aren't, but I know for me, that's an easy way to slip. It's my number one personal rule. Weigh, measure, and track your food - every bite. Not sure if you are exercising, but you know that helps, too.

It's possible to not lose for a few weeks when you are doing everything right, and you have lost a lot of weight in a short time. Your body needs time to adjust. Try to focus on the big picture. It really is what you do over time that will make the difference in the long run. Good luck!

[BeagleLover 1,020]

@@fatblasting

Hey man--- you've lost 125lbs. in 4 frickin' months!!!!!! That is nothing short of incredible!

It sounds like you know which habits are sneaking back in. The drinking isn't in your best interest. Go back to basics, getting your Protein and veggies, leaving little or no room for carbs. Go to a bariatric support group. When I went to the surgeon's first presentation, he said that going regularly to a support group greatly increased peoples' long term chances of success. That's what you want, isn't it?

I'm being sleeved next Friday and hope to have the success you've already had!

[AvaFern 3,516]

If you're sure that you are tracking your calories correctly, you are probably at a stall. 800-1300 calories a day is completely fine. I've had a few stalls, one of which lasted almost 2 months and I was also eating within the calorie limits. I know some people won't agree with this, but you can eat 1200 calories of junk or 1200 calories of good food and it's still only 1200 calories. Sure, it's not a good idea for any extended period of time, but there are days where I'll eat 900 calories in cheezits and nutterbutters, and then maybe a 200 calorie sandwich. It's not often but when I do I don't worry about it because I know that I'm still within the calorie range. As long as you're not gaining, I would go with the idea that you're at a stall, maybe add a little more exercise, and keep working on it. You will lose eventually. Good luck!

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

I guess it comes down to this ....

What do you really want?

Once you know / decide that, you'll know what to do.

[Who Dat 70461 331]

Not to sound harsh, but damn it, you have to want it...nobody can do it for you! You know what you have to do, now that you've undergone this major/life-changing surgery...quit whining and just do it!

Those first 3-6 months were the most challenging for me, as well as almost everyone else...to say it was an emotional friggin' roller coaster is an understatement!

You will get through this, however you have to be physically active (Walking, biking, swimming...anything other than sitting on your backside!) and you have to track your food intake...and be honest!

This procedure has been a blessing for me and my wife (she was sleeved exactly 2 months after me), however I'd be lying if I said it was easy...it was work. You just gotta get through the gettin' through man! If there is a support group in your area, go to it. If there isn't one, start one! Everyone has the right to visit a pity party now and then, the key is knowing when it's time to get up and leave!

Good luck and Godspeed for what will be an incredible journey on the road to a healthier and happier you my friend!

[Jersrose43 837]

Ok so blunt is who I am

You need to have a conversation with your significant other.

You said yourself what is going wrong ---- carbs, sugar, drinking when you eat. She can do it and get away with it. Good for her. A supportive partner will see this is not working for you.

Am guessing she prepares the meals. Perhaps you need to help out a little in the planning. If she wants to continue on her path you need to decide if that's the path you will follow or will you stick to your plan for your body and health.

I am sorry if I was too harsh. I don't mean to be. But you said it all yourself. Join a support group if you are able. Leave her home during those sessions.

[BeagleLover 1,020]

I suggest bringing your girlfriend to support groups. It may help her re-commit to being healthy and make better choices.

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

day of surgery (06/24/14) I was 526lbs, today I weigh 479lbs

@@fatblasting

not trying to be harsh but.....no sugar coating

pre-op

600 lbs

DOS

6-24-14

526 lbs

down 74 lbs since pre-op

9/21/14 (today)

479 lbs lbs

weight loss since surgery

47 lbs

total weight loss pre and post op

121 lbs

height

6'8!!!!

just wanted to make sure my figure are correct

your girlfriend had the gastric bypass, kindof cheating

don't know whats gonna happen with that?? 125 lbs down?

but, she's not the issue - you are

you should not follow her lead by eating what she makes

you need to "fend for yourself" with your eating choices

as mentioned earlier, find a support group - very beneficial

call your hospital and they should help guide you to a group

as OP said - have a serious talk with girlfrined

tell her something like you want to/need to lose about 225 more lbs

ask her if she could please support you more

if she doesn't want to/can't change her habits for you

oh well

you don't need to have all those goodies around

empty the pantry et al

if she won't "let you" - nothing you can do about that

ignore what she eats - you must!!!! - much easier said than done

"millions" of other people on the board have families/kids/spouses/SO

other people also have to deal with tempting foods around the house

in the "normal" world - there are usually goodies around

you gotta put your nose up and ignore them

again much easier said then done!!!

you "might" not have a NUT any more???

talk to a nutritionalist

if insurance doesn't cover it - try to save your pennies

(all those pennies that you would have spent on chips, dip, Cookies et al11 )

you went through major surgery to help you lose a large amout of weight

the sleeve will assist you in losing weight

but............you must follow all the rules you have been taught - for the rest of your life!!!!

you work with the sleeve and it will work with and for you

as@@MichiganChic said............

There is no secret, and no magic bullet. The key is to be honest with yourself. I'm not saying you aren't, but I know for me, that's an easy way to slip. It's my number one personal rule. Weigh, measure, and track your food - every bite. Not sure if you are exercising, but you know that helps, too.

basic reminder sleeve rules 101

drink at least 64 oz of Water a day

stop drinking 15-20 minutes before you eat

never ever drink with your meals

do not drink for 45-60 minutes after you eat

cut all your food into very small pieces

chew thoroughly

put utensil down between bites

eat very slowly

IMO put food on small plate so you "kid yourself" into thinking you are eating more

eat Protein, Protein and more protein first

keep carb intake low as possible

sure there are more things

but i'm having a "senior moment" and can't remember any more things to tell you

"maybe" give yourself a jump start of losing a little more weight by starting back at the beginning with those "yummy" Protein shakes

measure, measure, and measure

you will be much healthier when you reach goal (losing 125 lbs is the tip of the iceburg)

many co-morbities will improve or be gone after weight loss

i.e high blood pressure, diabetes, CPAP to mention a few

you already know this

i see how smart you can be

potential, success is right around the corner(as long as you work hard )

please do this now for your health!!!

not tomorrow, now!!!

not easy, but i know you can/want/must do this!!!!

my apologies if i was to harsh on you

not my intent

I just "feel" for you, and want you to lose weight and be much healthier, happier, and be abler to live a much lllllllonger life

who deserves it more???

you have shown you can be successful

hard work, but i know you can do this!!!!

repeating, no lecture or harshness intended, just trying to help a friend in need

good luck

kathy

[fatblasting 30]

@@proudgrammy I appreciate your tenderness! I am going to get into a support group, that will probably work.

[fatblasting 30]

@@Jersrose43 Thank you for the reality check.

[fatblasting 30]

@@Who Dat 70461 I am VERY honest with my food intake. I know I am eating wrong, I mentioned that. I have a personal trainer and workout regularly. I appreciate you being harsh, I need to hear it.

[fatblasting 30]

@@BeagleLover I've lost 47lbs since surgery.

[BeagleLover 1,020]

@@BeagleLover I've lost 47lbs since surgery.

Oh, your profile / setting says you lost 121lbs. Sorry! 47lbs. is pretty darn good too. Are you able to exercise, for example, go swimming?

[fatblasting 30]

@@BeagleLover I lost 74lbs before surgery. I appreciate the compliment and thank you for your encouragement.

I exercise 4 times a week, twice with a trainer and twice on my own.

Edited September 22, 2014 by fatblasting