Miserable

[ochiatl 24]

@@marfar7 My husband is also obese and at this point has no plans to change himself. A day after the pizza we went shopping and Cookies, jalapeño poppers, doughnuts, and whatever else processed junk was in the cart. Before the surgery I definitely had more then one conversation with him about supporting me and maybe even joining me on eating healthy and maybe join the gym together. So far it looks like I'm the only one on this journey, I can't push him to do something he doesn't want to do and I'm not about to.

The night of the pizza I gave him the go ahead and told him I'd be fine, which honestly I probably would have been if it were one pizza because I knew it would be gone within a few hrs and out of sight, But no what I got were two pizzas sitting on my kitchen table for two days.

Sometimes it take them to see the proof to buy in. Once he sees you get healthy and happier...he'll want a piece of that too. Especially when other take notice. Men are oh so visual.

[MichiganGirl 24]

I remember breaking down one night at about the end of the first 2 weeks. I knew what I was in for. Had read the forum forward and backwards. But nothing could prepare me for the actual emotions and feelings coursing through me. I broke down and cried to my guy. Full of regret and anger I railed about what a mistake I had made and I'm always hungry and this isn't what I signed up for etc... etc...

The next day I had my first food. Smashed/pureed egg salad. Nothing had ever tasted so wonderful. Made me feel like a human being again. It also stopped the hunger. Which then led me to believe most of what I had been experiencing was head hunger. Had to be - because I certainly didn't feel it the same way after re-introducing food.

I think it's just struggling through these first bits Baby! Soon you'll feel like a new woman! Good luck to you. Chin up!

[MichiganGirl 24]

....and regarding the husband bringing in the pizza? WRONG. That is not support in any way regardless if he isn't going to change his habits, he should be supporting you. He signed up for the whole marriage thing right?

[HalloweenBaby24 447]

He did but so did I and the man is a helpless fawn in the kitchen. I had to cook french fries and corn dogs tonight (his choice) I made it through. Thing's are getting better, I'm use to the hunger feeling now but I keep reminding myself I really only have 3 more day's till the soft food phase, So theres a light at the end of the tunnel coming soon.

Edited September 16, 2014 by HalloweenBaby24

[LAG 34]

Hang in there!

[Cococat 119]

@@marfar7 My husband is also obese and at this point has no plans to change himself. A day after the pizza we went shopping and Cookies, jalapeño poppers, doughnuts, and whatever else processed junk was in the cart. Before the surgery I definitely had more then one conversation with him about supporting me and maybe even joining me on eating healthy and maybe join the gym together. So far it looks like I'm the only one on this journey, I can't push him to do something he doesn't want to do and I'm not about to.

The night of the pizza I gave him the go ahead and told him I'd be fine, which honestly I probably would have been if it were one pizza because I knew it would be gone within a few hrs and out of sight, But no what I got were two pizzas sitting on my kitchen table for two days.

Cococat replies:

First, you are not alone. You have US.

Your husband is unconsciously or consciously trying to torture you for having the courage that he lacks, to get this operation. I feel sorry for him that he is so narcissitic and fearful. Men like that who are obese but do not want to do anything about it (and who sabotage your efforts) are also afraid of losing their spouse when their spouse gets thin. WHEN you get thin, you will get a lot of attention ... which he will resent. Your husband is a child. When you join the gym, (as you should) he will feel even more threatened because you will be meeting new people (read that as admiring men) and have a new life, apart from his obese one.

If there is a light at the end of the tunnel it is that he might eventually see the error of his ways and join you in a healthier lifestyle, or he will eat himself so large that he will stuff himself to death with food. At which point you should make a beautiful, and thin widow. Make sure he has LOTS of life insurance.