auntiemel 275 Posted August 28, 2014 So my mom told my sister that having the sleeve will be such a drastic change that I won't be able to handle it and she doesn't understand why diet isn't working for me. I'm just frustrated. I thought my mom was supportive but I guess she's not. She lost 100 lbs a few years ago, BUT she gave up food and transferred her addiction to alcohol. She still eats lots of sugary foods and counts fat content, which doesn't work for me...I'm happy she lost weight, but sad that she doesn't support me and that she continues to drink. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BitterSweet* 835 Posted August 28, 2014 That must be difficult. I'm so sorry. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BeagleLover 1,020 Posted August 28, 2014 Sorry to hear that. I applaud you for going ahead and making yourself healthy regardless. On some level, your Mom has to know this isn't right. Any chance she would go to Al Anon and see a nutritionist to get back on track? If her alcohol issues were under control, her real self would show itself and, I imagine she would be supportive of you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LindafromFlorida 1,542 Posted August 28, 2014 Focus on YOU, not your Mom's problems. God Bless honey! Good luck! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
auntiemel 275 Posted August 28, 2014 Sorry to hear that. I applaud you for going ahead and making yourself healthy regardless. On some level, your Mom has to know this isn't right. Any chance she would go to Al Anon and see a nutritionist to get back on track? If her alcohol issues were under control, her real self would show itself and, I imagine she would be supportive of you. I wish she would go to AA or even a treatment center. She has been drinking heavily for about 10 years now. Even a DUI didn't scare her into sobriety. I tried to have surgery in 2012 and my weight went up with all my "food funerals" and she thinks I won't make good decisions. I have had 6 months of nutritional counseling this time, and I've lost some weight. I'm focusing on low carbs and I have had pizza once in a blue moon, but last night I told myself no more. The surgery is going to be a tool to help me eat less and focus on quality not quantity. My husband ordered a dominoes pizza and I made my own zucchini pizza instead. I had one piece of cheese bread and are my yummy dinner. It just makes me sad that people say "exercise more" "eat less" and you don't need this surgery. I am a food addict and always will be, but I want this to help me be a recovered food addict if that makes sense. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LindafromFlorida 1,542 Posted August 28, 2014 I wish she would go to AA or even a treatment center. She has been drinking heavily for about 10 years now. Even a DUI didn't scare her into sobriety. I tried to have surgery in 2012 and my weight went up with all my "food funerals" and she thinks I won't make good decisions. I have had 6 months of nutritional counseling this time, and I've lost some weight. I'm focusing on low carbs and I have had pizza once in a blue moon, but last night I told myself no more. The surgery is going to be a tool to help me eat less and focus on quality not quantity. My husband ordered a dominoes pizza and I made my own zucchini pizza instead. I had one piece of cheese bread and are my yummy dinner. It just makes me sad that people say "exercise more" "eat less" and you don't need this surgery. I am a food addict and always will be, but I want this to help me be a recovered food addict if that makes sense. I understand addictions in a terrible way. Your Mother cannot make informed decisions for you. Change your life. Go to Alanon. Like my deceased sister said once, we are all addicted to something. Fight your battle and be strong. Love, hugs and prayers. God Bless. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
auntiemel 275 Posted August 28, 2014 I understand addictions in a terrible way. Your Mother cannot make informed decisions for you. Change your life. Go to Alanon. Like my deceased sister said once, we are all addicted to something. Fight your battle and be strong. Love, hugs and prayers. God Bless. Thank you for your kind words! I really appreciate them. I come on here for more support than anything else. It seems a lot of people have saboteurs and unsupportive people in their lives. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Arlene G 31 Posted August 28, 2014 Please be strong for yourself. I am very sorry your mom is an alcoholic. As people have advised, you may wish to go to Al Anon. Your mom switched one addiction for another one. What matters is what YOU think about yourself. Don't listen to her negativity. It is your life. You know you can do it. Best of luck to you, dear. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blue Sky 89 Posted August 28, 2014 Not sure what happened to my first reply but sounds like your mom wants the best for you but she is talking from her fears. You just stay focused on your own reasons for your decision and u will be fine. As for the alcohol addiction, here's a sidebar: my therapist told me that cross addictions are not uncommon in bariatric patients because they can transfer their food addiction to something else like shopping, alcohol or gambling. In other words, we all need to have stuff worked out before we get the surgery. Wish you the best! Keep your eye on the prize! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunnkistme 76 Posted August 28, 2014 I am sorry your mom just isn't going to be able to be there for you. It sucks. I am wavering about not telling my mom because she just does not have a filter and shares everything with everyone. Last night, on another thread, they were sharing appropriate responses when someone says something clueless like you should just eat less and exercise more 'Wow, I have never tried that, thank you so much for letting me in on how it works" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites