Ugh my Mother!

[lose4life2 152]

Let me say I love my mom and her opinion most of the time. Just this drives me crazy. She knows a man, as do I that had his stomach stapled or let's say 35 years ago. He lost some weight and then he gained it all back and a ton more. I think she thinks this is exactly what is going to happen to me. I want to say "thanks for the confidence mom". And like many of you have said just wait. I actually can't wait until she tells me how great I look, but she may never. I will be healthy and happy.

[lose4life2 152]

Oh good grief. Im so sorry you have to go through this. Im lucky my late mom was supportive, but I still would of had WLS , with or without her support. My body, my issues, my life. Same for you. Annnnnd.......... no disrespect to your mom, but im guessing she's had some sort of surgery in her lifetime, dental, broken bone, etc. Next time she bugs you about YOUR surgery, ask her why SHE had surgery. Why did'nt she just fix the problem herself and skip surgery ? Because she had a problem that could'nt be solved without it surgery. Same idea applies to WLS. Just sayin. I wish you the best. (and I have 3 adopted grown kids, im a step child myself, so yes I get that there are other issues, but thats a story for another day. ) good luck !

ha ha that made me chuckle!!!

[katonaboat 44]

I neglected to mention that I told my mom I was having surgery for a hiatal hernia ...

That's what I told my mom, too. Before I went to an information seminar, I mentioned WLS casually and she was so negative I decided not to tell her. I even went so far as to tell her I was having the surgery on a Friday afternoon, when it was actually scheduled for Thursday. I was afraid she would insist on being at the hospital that morning. I was released midday Friday, called her on my way home and told her my surgery was rescheduled and I forgot to mention it. I have since "confessed" by telling her my insurance approved the sleeve as a necessary part of my treatment at the last minute. When she brings it up and starts to become negative, I start gushing about how much better I feel now that I'm not suffering from GERD at night. She loves me and can't help but be glad for me when I do that.

[Summer Rain 245]

You just gotta love moms! I am one myself and I hope that my children will always feel comfortable telling me whatever they want to tell me but I have to tell you that I am not telling my mother that I am going to have WLS. I don't want to worry her but more than that I don't want to listen to "the talk" about eating less, eating healthier, and exercising more. So I will have my sleeve done and then I will follow all that good advice that I just know she was going to give me

[5comorbids 12]

@@VSGAnn2014 I totally get you!

[5comorbids 12]

I neglected to mention that I told my mom I was having surgery for a hiatal hernia ...

I am totally laughing right now because that is my plan of what to tell my mom! Seriously - that is what I am going to tell her... and my 4 year old who can't keep a secret! hahahahahaha!

A friend told me to tell her I am having surgery on my esophagus to hopefully help my GERD problem... That is closer to the truth with RNY.

So glad I ran into your comment here!

[5comorbids 12]

@@Andrew0929 -- I also used the hiatal hernia alibi with my parents, and it turned out to be true. Sometimes I wonder of that fix is part of why I feel so great or if it's just the WLS.

Hi @ Bandista,

What are the symptoms of a hiatal hernia? I think I may have one and if so will they take care of it during RNY surgery??? Did your's get taken care of during your surgery? I guess it's time to google and write that on my list for my next bariatric appointment. Please share....

[Bandista 7,466]

@@5comorbids hi there and congratulations on your upcoming surgery! I didn't know I had a hiatal hernia until after my surgery but they had suggested that many people do and if they found one they would repair it as part of my surgery (I got the band and don't know much about RNY but I think it's probably a similar "while we were there" situation)......I think I may have been suffering from hiatal hernia symptoms without knowing it. I didn't have acid, which is a common HH symptom, but I had pain in the solar plexus area and that feeling of needing to sigh heavily. And I feel so much better now -- maybe that is the new life post WLS or maybe getting the hiatal hernia taken care of is part of that, who knows. The last few days I've had some of those symptoms back and I think that is anxiety (so upset about these shootings, and Robin Williams taking his life really hit me unexpectedly). Re: the hiatal hernia surgery, I was shocked when the billing came through and I saw what they got for that, whew! I will never hesitate to call my surgeon's office about anything, however small. They are well-compensated and hey, I'm worth it! But I digess. Back to mothers, the first thing mine asked is whether it was strangulated. (?). Also I informed her of the surgery at the very last minute so there would be no insistence on coming to the hospital. Good luck to you -- you're going to do great.

[Bandista 7,466]

Oh, and 5comorbids, very funny about the four-year old -- your own little public relations staff! I remember a "to tell or not to tell" post a while back from a woman who went to great pains to conceal her surgery only to have her toddler rat her out to every single person she encountered. "Mommy got a belt on the INSIDE of her tummy!" Still makes me laugh.

@pinkdahlia I am an adoptive parent also and adopted myself......as you say, stories for another day. And I wish you could see the dahlias in my garden right now -- some are even pink!

[pink dahlia 2,513]

Its 6:30 am and im sitting in a NJ hotel getting ready to head out and take a train to Cooperstown , NY for a week of fun . ( Hubby is an umpire), anyone have any advice, things to see or do in between hubbys schedule ? Thanks ! Bandista, congrats on all your pretty dahlias, not one of my 8 (Seattle area) came up this year. Not sure what happened but I sure love them !

[Crosby 303]

I feel ya even though my mother is deceased. My mother in law who is in her 90's is staying with us temporarily while she recovers from an ankle injury. I hope to God she is gone before my surgery. I already have a really small tongue from biting it off over her constant criticism and her belief in her own perfection. If she is here it will be difficult to hide the surgery from her and I am fearful I will tape her to the celing fan after the first negative comment.

[Summer Rain 245]

Lol! Tape her to the ceiling fan!!! Post pics if you do this. Thanks I needed a laugh this morning!

[jessiquoi 623]

so now I've got the other half of my sandwich (my daughter... I call her and my mom the bread of my sandwich, they come at me from both sides) telling me I should tell my mom about the surgery NOW and not to wait. I want to laugh... she's very opinionated and strong willed, and has absolutely no problem telling me what I should do. I don't know where she gets that from, as I still don't feel comfortable doing the same with my mom.

I think I will plan a trip to visit mom next weekend (i'm in MD, and she's in NYC) and tell her. what the heck, I've got caller id... I can always choose not to answer if she starts making me crazy about it!

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Why are you persuaded by others to do things you feel are not in your best interests?

[gowalking 10,790]

Pink Dahlia, if you are a baseball fan, go to the Hall of Fame. I have to admit that when I went to Cooperstown, that's all I did. It was a day trip and I had no time to do any other exploring. But I do recall that the area was very pretty...I'm sure you can take advantage of that even if it's just exploring the area.