Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Recommended Posts

I do not remember seeing one here, so I am going to start a thread on what we can come back with a sting when someone makes a derogatory comment about our weight loss or accuses us of taking the easy way out. We can keep it tame, like

Say, "If you're not on board with my weight loss plans, let's change the subject."

Or we can go after them hard with something like "Well then, you should never get on an elevator or drive your car ever again!

Oh, I just found a three page thread on this topic from 2012. Here is the link.

http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/202970-need-comebacks-for-easy-way-out-crack/

What else can we add to it?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh, I just thought of one myself. Tell her that your other option was a tapeworm.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I read an interesting perspective. Do diabetics take the easy way out using insulin? Do heart patients take the easy way out with mess and surgery instead of diet and exercise ?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I remember reading one of those etiquette experts give advice on how to handle nosy or mean spirited (said as if well-intentioned) comments and questions and I think it works in a lot of situations: Look at them with mild surprise, count to three in your head and then say "I'm sorry, what did you say?" and when they repeat it say slowly "That's what I thought you said." and change the subject. If they persist then I'd just tell them that my doctor and I made a health decision and although they're certainly entitled to their opinion, it doesn't really factor into my views on my own health and well being and then end the conversation.

Luckily, I haven't had anyone be so awful to me. (Yet)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

GREAT thread, MissMac. Thanks.

How about these comments? How would you respond to them?

1. You're losing weight so fast! Are you sure that's healthy?

2. You've lost too much weight. You're starting to look gaunt!

3. Come on, tell me the truth ... did you have WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY?! (The last three words are either spoken louder than the first part of the sentence or stage-whispered.)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I remember reading one of those etiquette experts give advice on how to handle nosy or mean spirited (said as if well-intentioned) comments and questions and I think it works in a lot of situations: Look at them with mild surprise, count to three in your head and then say "I'm sorry, what did you say?" and when they repeat it say slowly "That's what I thought you said." and change the subject. If they persist then I'd just tell them that my doctor and I made a health decision and although they're certainly entitled to their opinion, it doesn't really factor into my views on my own health and well being and then end the conversation.

Luckily, I haven't had anyone be so awful to me. (Yet)

I've read a few threads on this topic - and this is my favorite response so far. I had thought that if someone said this to me I would just raise my eyebrows and walk away, but this is even better. I wouldn't want to come up with a retort that sounded defensive when the question is just so completely ludicrous that it doesn't merit a response.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A bit snarky back but I think it would do the trick: Look closely at the corner of their mouth and sweetly say,"Excuse me, but there is a tiny bit of BS left on your lip."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

GREAT thread, MissMac. Thanks.

How about these comments? How would you respond to them?

1. You're losing weight so fast! Are you sure that's healthy?

2. You've lost too much weight. You're starting to look gaunt!

3. Come on, tell me the truth ... did you have WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY?! (The last three words are either spoken louder than the first part of the sentence or stage-whispered.)

Personally for me I'd go with:

1) My doctor and nutritionist are very thorough. They have a lot of experience and they're tailoring their expertise to my personal needs. I feel in good hands. How has your summer been?

2) A lot of people are used to seeing me much bigger so they're not used to my weight loss. So far I'm really happy with my progress. How is work going?

3) Yes, I had weight loss surgery. Statistics show it's the best chance people have for keeping the weight off. Do you think Hillary will get the nomination for 2016?

Everyone has to find what they're comfortable with though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Back in the day, Dear Abbey offered a generic response to nosy questions: "Why would you want to know?"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'd forgotten where that one came from Miss Mac. For years I've used a version of it; (imagine look of surprise and feigned innocence) "Gosh, why on earth would you ask such a thing?!" Used it when my own sister asked how much our mortgage was and if I was really okay incurring dept for graduate school. Hah!

Great thread - and one I needed today. I returned from 4 weeks of vacation yesterday to a rather public job. No one had noticed so much of what I'd lost before I left (really folks? You didn't spot those missing 40 pounds?!) and now i'm down another 16. One woman hugged me and as she pulled away, not whispering at all, said "You're not going to be able to hide what you had done much longer!" They all knew I took time off for surgery, and I was oblique about it being 'gastric' but that was all I said. I just smiled and said it was great to see her. Sigh. I wouldn't mind a quiet private comment to me alone, but not in a crowd thank you very much.

Several people in my family have said quasi-compliments about how much i've lost or how 'skinny (at 227?) I am getting. I hate the dwell on it, since it eventually comes down to someone saying how they wish they could do WLS but don't qualify. It's said in a way that conveys how unfairly easy this route is of course. To them I've just shut it down saying, "Thank you - I"m working hard on it!" and then change of subject or side step away to someone else.

On the other hand, everyone else said how healthy and well rested I looked. So i'll stay with enjoying those compliments instead!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just say "I'll pass it on to my physician that you disagree with his treatment plan" and walk off. I used it before. Worked great! LOL!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Alisa_S

      Gearing up for my consult 01/14! Starting to get a little nervous.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Goyafigs

      I had VSG 11.20.24 with Miguel Burch, MD Cedars-Sinai and I am 1 month post-op. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • DaisyChainOz

      🥳 Jan 1 2025 - Day 1 of Pre Op, surgery on the 16th! 😬😅
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      Just been waiting until time for my consult with my bariatric surgeon. It's scheduled for Jan 9th. Turns out I won't actually be seeing him. Apparently it'll be with his P.A.             Not sure what to expect. I thought this is where the surgeon would discuss the best surgery option for me. For years I had my heart set on the sleeve, but I've read so many people have issues with reflux - even if they've never had it before - that they've had to be revised to the bypass. I already deal with GERD & take 40 mg of Omeprazole daily, so I started studying about bypass and honestly, it seems like it might be the better choice for me. How can we discuss surgery options if the surgeon is not there?
      What happened at your first consult? Trying to get an idea of what to expect, or maybe I should say, what NOT to expect.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • rinabobina

      I would like to know what questions you wish you had asked prior to your duodenal switch surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×