Why are some weight loss surgery patients so clueless?

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

I forget if I've posted this here already, but when I asked my surgeon what distinguished those who lose all the weight they need to lose and keep it off vs. those who don't achieve that level of success, he practically shouted with passion: "They never stop being in touch with us and always use all the resources we offer, and they never miss any of their appointments!"

This past Monday (at my last appointment with him pre-op) I had to sign an agreement saying I would keep all my post-surgical appointments at: 1 week, 1 month, 2 months, 3 months, 6 months, 1 year, and annually thereafter ... forever!

Edited August 6, 2014 by VSGAnn2014

[Kindle 8,667]

I'm going to play devil's advocate a bit here when it comes to the claims that you must have followup appointments with your surgical team in order to be successful. I'm someone that did go to Mexico for my surgery. I did a ton of online research, read a couple WLS books, talked to other WLS patients, chose which surgery I wanted, selected a qualified surgeon, made all the arrangements and lost all the weight they wanted me to preop. All without ever consulting a doctor or nutritionist or psychologist or therapist or attending any informational seminars or support group meetings, or any other insurance hoops.

Although I have been able to contact my surgeon's office postop via phone calls and emails, I have had no doctor office visits, weigh-ins, or nutritional consults. I simply read and followed the instructions I was sent home with. I figured out what foods and supplements I like and it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know what foods you should and shouldn't eat. Counting and tracking and measuring really has not been necessary for me because I make smart choices and listen to my body.

I hit my surgeon's goal before 6 month and my personal goal about a month later....and still losing about a pound/ week. I just posted my before and after pictures http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/315787-new-and-improved-after/ and I am really quite proud of myself. At six months out I contacted my PCP and asked him to order the labs my surgeon recommended. All my levels were normal (except Iron and Calcium were high so I've adjusted my supplements). I'll do the same thing at my one year mark.

I have no doubt a strong support team and followup is helpful and maybe needed for some people to succeed. But I also think any individual that is committed to their WLS Decision and is willing to take responsible for their own health can do this. I'm not one to hold someone's hand through life and I certainly don't expect or look for someone to hold mine. Of course I am only 7 1/2 months out, so I'm not yet considered a "success", and only time will tell if I'm full of sh... t or not.

Edited August 7, 2014 by Kindle

[LindafromFlorida 1,542]

Your title says " Why are some patients so clueless. If you are not saying it then what is it in your title for....I am not offended by what you wrote or anything about you.....you too offer so much to this community and are valuable to say the least @@VSGAnn2014 I have never seen you on the attack and I know that you take this journey very seriously.

I guess for me it is all about the people who post here because they just don't understand the way it has been explained by the first, second or third person.

Why just last night I found out some terminology concerning concerning my latest complication and it was finally explained to me so that I understood......Yup I guess I was clueless the 20 times the surgeon tried to explain it to me....Now I know I am in deep doo, doo this time.....

If I had asked and asked several times on here about it like I did in my life how would people have responded. Would I have finally got the straight, harsh by the book answer....I have before and I did not like it...I felt stupid and like I did not belong to the site...

Well okay maybe I am a hand holder. but you know what I can sleep at night.. Because I used to be the tell it like it is gal and I did not like me ...So be it! That is me....I too am a ford..like me or don't.....But in here I hope people feel safe enough to ask even the silly questions over and over again....That is a forum. It is going to happen and if you think I think less of you because you posted it..You are wrong...I don't spend my time feeling like that...

I am trying to get healthy....inch by inch and step by step like most people on here. Like you too......

I think sometimes when the path is easier for some it is fact and the way it is....People who have hit the hard road on this journey tend to be more the other way...You don't know unless you have traveled the other I think. I would have loved to have had it a hop skip and a jump. But no! So I have all kinds of fears and I hope that if I mention them here that the ones that feel it is repeated and repeated and repeated question. Or comments like my complications through this that they don't roll their eyes and say oh god here she goes again.. boo hoo!

Edited August 7, 2014 by LindafromFlorida

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

Seems that no matter what words I use in this thread.. They are wrong..So...I shall take the back door and leave this thread to those who can express themselves better then I......

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Sigh.

[jjinWA 511]

RJ, your choice to take that back seat is understood. There is nothing wrong with hearing out different opinions. It is just that some opinions come out a bit 'louder and it drowns out any other opinion. Thus the reason that the more calm response simply just disappears and the poster chooses to decline in the need to get in the last word. To continue to respond is futile. There are those that will never see or understood any opinion but their own.

[fat_free 463]

RJ and Lipstick Lady, I value all of your posts! They all bring great insight and valuable information whether they apply applies to me or not at the moment. I have come to see that all information is and will be relative to me and others. Keep giving your feedback as is.

We all need to Remember that everyone is providing feedback and responses relative to their own experience and so we as readers need to take it as that and decide whether we can, need or want to use the info provided. Words on a screen are just that *words*. As someone else pointed out there is not tone or visual clues to be able to assess what is *meant* being the words. We need to remember that often people are responding on mobile devices, small screens and on the move. So responses can be curt but always well meaning and are there to impart knowledge or personal experiences.

Just my two cents.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

RJ and Lipstick Lady, I value all of your posts! They all bring great insight and valuable information whether they apply applies to me or not at the moment. I have come to see that all information is and will be relative to me and others. Keep giving your feedback as is.

We all need to Remember that everyone is providing feedback and responses relative to their own experience and so we as readers need to take it as that and decide whether we can, need or want to use the info provided. Words on a screen are just that *words*. As someone else pointed out there is not tone or visual clues to be able to assess what is *meant* being the words. We need to remember that often people are responding on mobile devices, small screens and on the move. So responses can be curt but always well meaning and are there to impart knowledge or personal experiences.

Just my two cents.

Absolutely. Take what you want, leave what you don't, and don't judge others for not responding the way you might.

[LindafromFlorida 1,542]

RJ, your choice to take that back seat is understood. There is nothing wrong with hearing out different opinions. It is just that some opinions come out a bit 'louder and it drowns out any other opinion. Thus the reason that the more calm response simply just disappears and the poster chooses to decline in the need to get in the last word. To continue to respond is futile. There are those that will never see or understood any opinion but their own.

I will assure you JjinWA at my age I have no need or desire to get in any last word and drown out anyone. I seek no sympathy. I only offer insight on this ONE thread. I do not whine. If you met me you would like me and know that I am genuine. If we cannot talk and share what is the point here? It is not US against THEM, me against you. Hang in there sunshines!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

I will assure you JjinWA at my age I have no need or desire to get in any last word and drown out anyone. I seek no sympathy. I only offer insight on this ONE thread. I do not whine. If you met me you would like me and know that I am genuine. If we cannot talk and share what is the point here? It is not US against THEM, me against you. Hang in there sunshines!

You are delicious.

[jjinWA 511]

Again, I will repeat one more time. Nothing wrong with differing opinions. Say it, then move on. No need to keep at it. OMG. Don't care about personal status, age, etc. everyone should be able to respond and not have to defend it over and over. I am not disagreeing with any opinion here. Just allow all to post and not feel attacked for saying what they feel. That should apply to everyone. I agree with RJ. No need for me to continue.... We are way off point and to continue just feed to those that love this type of dialog. I've seen this in soooooo many other threads. Sad.

[LindafromFlorida 1,542]

Again, I will repeat one more time. Nothing wrong with differing opinions. Say it, then move on. No need to keep at it. OMG. Don't care about personal status, age, etc. everyone should be able to respond and not have to defend it over and over. I am not disagreeing with any opinion here. Just allow all to post and not feel attacked for saying what they feel. That should apply to everyone. I agree with RJ. No need for me to continue.... We are way off point and to continue just feed to those that love this type of dialog. I've seen this in soooooo many other threads. Sad.

SAD? You joined April 2014. I think YOU are the attacker. Leave me be please. Goodbye.

[jjinWA 511]

Sigh.

[HotButterFly 981]

Thanks for this thread!! The following person said it Best:

In my job I deal with people of all levels of intelligence and so what seems crystal clear to some is going to be confusing and a gray area to others.

As to why they'd commit to such a big surgery without a lot of research and reflection? Myriad reasons, I would imagine.

Again, I think we're all assuming everyone has above average intelligence and self awareness and a lot of people simply do not. Maybe they know someone who breezed through WLS and think they can too.

I recently answers a post EXACTLY like the one you're referring to, and the person responded by telling me I was unsupportive & whatnot. She took her friend's advice over the advice of her surgeon. Like them teenagers say: it's whatever!

Edited August 7, 2014 by HotButterFly

[I will what I want 271]

I have been shocked over and over again by what I personally did not know. I studied this for two years. did research and watched videos and asked questions on here and to my team. I did not know: What to eat and when in detail. 64 oz. of water..say what? I loved water..What I hate it now..Never heard of such a thing! I did not know any nutritional retraining I would need. I did not know that you can get a leak 18 months out. I did not know that you can get reactive Hypoglycemia. I did not know that when you gain muscle you get bigger. I did not know that you could really die from WLS. I did not know that people would treat you mean because you lost weight. I did not know that people would tell me I took the easy way out. I did not know that people can live without eating for 5.5 months... I guess I did not know a lot. But then I live in one of the the poorest Provinces. Not to mention the most backwards Province in Canada when it comes to health. I had no idea that most of the things that happened to me did.....I am shocked that more people are not aware of this life saving chance. And that more people die because they are not invested in the changing of lives.... I had no idea I would hate tuna after my surgery and I when it was I would be able to finally eat at all....I had to learn to eat again..Who does that! I never knew that people sucked the chocolate off of peanut M n M's and thought they weren't cheating..They should have eaten the peanuts..you know! Or lick the cheese off Doritos and feel satisfied...Say what! I know this is a little off the best but you know what I think: there are still people who think you can't get pregnant the first time you have sex. For such a time of the information age. People are still eating boxed macaroni and cheese and thinking that it is good for you. For now I will try to answer as many of those questions as I can and when and if I do tire out..I will back off and call it a day! For now..nope!

I love you more every time I read one of your posts! Hooray for RJ!