From LapBand to Sleeve - my journey

[amceache 5]

Hello fellow weight loss friends! I have decided to capture a little bit about what I have been through, and my progress through through the sleeve process. I also thought it might be helpful for those of you transitioning between band and sleeve to have some info about what feels the same and what feels different. I am also, selfishly, wanting to capture some of the feelings and emotions I have had around the success and subsequent failure of my band while it is so fresh in my head. This is not meant as a complain session, but a reminder of all the reasons I NEVER want to weigh 360 pounds ever again!

In April 2009, I had a successful Lap Band surgery, and was able to lose 120 pounds over the course of two years. I was so incredibly happy with the results, and often said it was the best decision I have ever made. To this day, despite the complication that came up for me, I am still not at all sorry I had surgery. I knew I wanted to have another baby, and the idea that I could adjust the band if I did get pregnant was very appealing. At the time, the notion that the band could be removed was also enticing, though it has become clear it was a tool that I really needed to be successful.

In 2012, I did get pregnant again, and unlike my first pregnancy, everything was incredibly smooth. I had started kickboxing in 2010 and was able to keep that up through almost all of my gestation. At the end, I was just too big and my balance was off, so it wan't safe to try and be quite so intense in my exercise. The gestational diabetes that I dealt with during my first pregnancy did NOT return, my blood pressure was normal throughout, and I gained very little weight. It was amazing. I have birth to a big, healthy baby boy in Feb. 2013.

Things took a dramatic turn for me in November 2013, however. I contracted a terrible stomach bug and threw up violently. Of course, I had the anti-nausea pills, and tried to take them, but just kept throwing them right back up over and over again. Unfortunately, I ended up with a perforated stomach and contracted severe peritonitis (as my stomach contents leaked into my peritoneal cavity.) Without going into great detail, I will just say that I was very sick and feel grateful to still be here today. I spent 6 nights in the hospital recovering and had to have the lap band removed at that time. It was the beginning of an unfortunate spiral for me.

I tried very hard to continue to eat the same way without the band that I had been eating with it for the past five years. As my voracious hunger returned, that became harder and harder to do, and as each month slipped by, weight was returning. I had gone back to kickboxing, but had to quit again because of the surgery. I fell into a pretty deep depression about the whole situation and knew early on that I wanted to consider getting the sleeve surgery ASAP. All of the reasons I needed the Lap Band as a tool were still in me, and I knew having another Lap Band installed would be a foolish choice. My surgeon agreed, and approved me for sleeve surgery in April 2014. Then, my insurance denied the surgery. I was totally devastated. That was when the weight really started piling on. I felt to totally defeated. I know my behavior was just stupid and fueled by self-pity, but nevertheless, I ended up just shy of my original weight prior to lap band surgery.

I appealed the decision, and ultimately won! (If anyone would like to see the letter to use as a template for your own appeal, I would be happy to share - just let me know).

So, fast forward to yesterday at 5:00 a.m. I arrived at the hospital so excited to get my life back! I was nervous too, of course, but I am happy to report that despite some significant scar tissue and damage from the band, my Dr. was very happy with how the procedure went. I write this at the beginning of day two, and so far, I am feeling great. I have been up and walking several times yesterday and today. I will start liquids this morning and will likely get off the IV fluids shortly. I will spend one more night here at the hospital, and then will get to go home. I plan to take a week off of work and return a week from tomorrow. I know that is a little on the short side, but fortunately my job is not physically demanding, so I think I will be ok. My pain is totally manageable, I have had a little bit of nausea off and on, but the Dr. gave me some medicine that helped a great deal with that. No throwing up, which is good! My back is a little sore from spending so much time in bed, but really, I feel fantastic overall!

I really do want to take a minute to capture all of the things that had resolved for me when I had lost the 120 pounds that came creeping back as I got heavy again. I never was skinny, but compared to 370 lbs., 244 felt like a dream! I wasn't sleeping well at night - I am sure my sleep apnea returned and I never woke up feeling rested. This resulted in tremendous fatigue that would last all the time, day in and day out. I was so uncomfortably hot all the time. Going to the grocery store was such a big ordeal. I would get so embarrassed about how sweaty I would get by the time I reached the check out line. My lower back hurt ALL THE TIME and my poor feet would just ache if I had to stand or walk for any longer than 10 to 15 minutes at a time. Getting up off the floor when I was playing with my children practically took 20 minutes. I had to be so very careful or my knees would suffer for days. The same was true for getting up the stairs. If I didn't take one step at a time, my left knee would give out, and I would be in tremendous pain. I have had headaches, it seems, everyday. Although I don't know this for sure, I suspect my type 2 diabetes has returned. I will know when I get my pre-op blood work back. When I try to walk, my hips hurt so bad. I can't cross my legs anymore and self-care has become really awkward. ALL of these things had become a normal part of my life prior to the Lap Band surgery 5 years ago. Gaining the weight back so quickly really made these issues feel especially awful - they were NOT normal to me anymore and as each new symptom came up, my depression worsened. I turned to the drug I knew and loved - food - to make myself feel better.

I am committed to using the sleeve as a tool in the same way I used the Lap Band. My hunger will be under control, which is an enormous key to success for me. I also said that the band was like a leash for my portions - I just could not eat very much, and that was ideal! I know that the sleeve will give me that same boundary. However, I think it is critical to say, neither the band nor the sleeve are an "easy way out." Quite the opposite. Nothing about starting over here is going to be easy. I have to make the decision every time I put food in my mouth - is this a good choice? Have I had enough Protein today? What SHOULD I be eating? Without strict adherence to my diet, I know I won't really be successful. However, after having such good luck with the band, I am truly confident I can have equally good and maybe even better results with my sleeve.

I will try to keep a record of my progress and hope to be able to compare what I experience with the sleeve to what things were like with the band. So far, recovery as felt very similar. I guess I am more confident this time because some of this isn't completely "new." I always had some port pain, from the very beginning, with the Lap Band, and I have to say, I don't really have any pain at all right now. So I guess that means one mark in the win column for sleeve.

Thanks for reading this, thanks for the support, and good luck to all of us on this journey. You are brave and amazing. I really do think it takes a great deal of courage to envision a different life for yourself, and even more courage to take the steps to make it happen. We can do this!!!!!!!

[4me4them 381]

Wow, congrats on the determination you showed to get back to your healthy self. Thanks for sharing your story and I wish nothing but a speedy recovery and return to the healthy, happy you!

[Cody's mom 247]

Wow what an amazing person you are, and thank you for sharing this. I will read and reread this letter to get me threw what ever bad days may come!

[deltadentist1913 1]

Hi. How are you doing now?