Interested but many questions

[Kimberley 0]

Hi there, I have been researching the web and am very interested in the lab band surgery. I saw that the cost at the Toronto clinic is $16,000. How have people been paying this....did anyone get loans?

I really want to do it but do not want to tell anyone including my husband. Any suggestions. He would flip if I did it.....

Can it be somthing that I can keep from him. I can just tell him I am on a new diet?

Help would be appreciated.

Thanks

Kimberley:help:

[faithmd 14]

I cannot really help with the how to pay for it part of your post as I am not Canandian.

I would think it would be quite difficult to keep the surgery from your husband. After all, it is *surgery* and there are incisions. You will have incisions on your stomach and how would you explain those? Even if you stay away from him while you are healing, he will still eventually see the scars and know you had something done. I would think that he should understand your struggle with your weight and be supportive of your desire to do something positive for yourself. Sure, $16,000 is a chunk of money, but what is your health worth? Your happiness?

I wish you much luck in your journey, please keep us posted!

[Kwalla_girl 0]

Both Toronto clinics will refer you to companies that specialize in loans for medical procedures. It is fairly easy to get a loan with them, sometimes taking even less than 1 hour to get approval; however I’ve found the interest they charge fairly high. I am also borrowing for my procedure, and chose to go to my bank and get a personal loan. I was able to get it at prime rate for two years.

I hope this helps. Good luck!

[green 6]

I think that you should get your husband on board concerning this project. You should then visit the bank which holds your mortgage to find out the cheapest way to borrow money for the surgery. Then shop around at a few other banks to see if they can do any better. If your mortgage is near the time of renewal you can offer that as an inducement to get a cheaper loan while you are shopping at other banks.

You will also need your husband's help while you are in your recovery period. Good luck with this and I hope that you will be able to be a bandster. The band has really helped so many of us.

[Yoda 0]

Though there are medical "loan" companies, believe me....you will get a much better rate going through your bank. We used our Line of Credit (better rate than the bank etc).

As far as not telling your husband....ummmm....the only way that will work is if you live far far far away from each other and you don't plan on seeing him for about a year!!! Seriously though, there is no way you can do this without him finding out/knowing....etc. Plus, don't you want to keep your relationship on an honest keel? I'd think twice about it if I were you and discuss it with him and include him....cause once he does find out (oh, and he will!!!) I can only imagine how he would feel THEN! Have him onboard from the outset.

[Jachut 487]

Even 17 months out, I could not hide the fact from my husband that I cannot eat like I used to, and that occasionally I get blocked up and twice have PB'd. He's going to notice that.

Not to mention spending $16,000 without your husband knowing is not what I'd call a good honest basis for a realtionship unless you keep your finances totally separate and dont feel obliged to each other in that regard at all. In our relationship, spending $16,000 without telling him, well I think we'd probably break up over something like that. We're in this marriage together for the long haul and taking out loans on the sly is not the way to make a success of that.

If you dont think he'll be on board about it, its not like you have to "ask permission". I'd be up front. I'd say "I really WANT to do this and I really NEED to do this so I am doing it and I hope you'll support me in it". But I wouldnt be dishonest about it.

[jurema 0]

Kimberley

I can't comment on how to pay for the surgery as I was saving to buy a car and instead paid for the surgery with the money I had saved. But.... I still haven't told my boyfriend that I'm getting the band. My family knows and they support me 100%, I'm just not ready to share that with my b/f. I persoanly don't think he would understand as he feels that weight loss is something that everyone can manage on their own without any challanges (pffffffffffft). I'm sure one day I'll let him know but right now I'm not comfortable with it. However, if I were married I would have to tell my husband and I would suggest you talk to him and find out what his thoughts are before he finds out on his own.

Jannet

[Gaffer 1]

I commend you for looking into the band beacause it is a really good solution, but it is something that would be impossible to do without your significant other knowing about. Besides, you will need the emotional support as you go through this.

In terms of finance options, due to the cost of the procedure you will likely need to involve you husband. I know in my family I could not hide the $16k plus fights & hotels. I paid for my band off my HELOC which is at prime. I may looks at doing some balance transfers to some 0% credit card for a while to cut down on some of the interest. I did not look into other finance options.

If this is something you are serious about you are going to have to involve your spouse.

Andrew

[Donna 0]

Hi I too feel that this type of surgery and being surgery it is absolutely necessary for your husband to know. There is always the potential for complications that could necessitate a serious or emergency situation.

Best Wishes,

Donna

VBG/87 Revised To Lapband/06 By Dr. Cobourn

251/162/125 goal

[Donna D 1]

I can't see how you could get around your husband with this. It is always best to stay on the up and up. I think he will come around. He may freak out at first but when you tell him your health will improve, you will feel sexier......you get my drift?

[JLB 0]

Hi Kimberley, good for you for finding this website and researching the Lapband system. Sounds like you are just at the beginning of the research so take your time and find out everything you want to know. Once you are well informed you may feel different about approaching your husband to tell him about the exciting information you have found. I'm not married so I didn't have to worry about the finance thing with the significant other but I think once he reads all the information you have found and understands what the Lapband is about he may be more supportive than you think. Good luck on your journey and do lots of sleuthing around this site becasue there's tons of info and great people to answer all your questions.

[Chester-girl 0]

Sorry Kim but I too do not think this is something you can keep from your hubby. I would suggest you arm yourself with as much knowledge as to the procedure itself as well as all the reasons you feel that this is a good option for you. I myself try to look at the cost as the same as 2 Timmy's coffee per day for the next 20 years. I know if may sound silly but your health is worth it.

I will keep you in my thoughts and I wish you good health.:peace:

Joanne

[LFERLAND 0]

This is something that you definately cannot and should not try to hide from your husband. You will NEED his full support. You should ask him what he thinks about it... you never know, he may ned up being more supportive than you think he will be. I'm sure he would be much more upset with you if you spent $16,000 behind his back!!! If he has concerns, ask him to explain what they are. Tell him exactly why you want to get this done. If he cannot understand that that this would be a positive change for your health and only has selfish reasons for hindering your decision then you may want to re-evaluate your relationship (I'm sorry if that came off as judgemental, I truly do not mean to be).

You should be proud of yourself that you want to make a commitment to bettering your health. Don't be afraid of what others might think.

As for payment, I personally got a loan through my bank. If you go this route then you will need to get a bank draft from the bank to give to your surgeon.

I truly hope you will be able to discuss this with your husband and he will be supportive of this. Whether or not you have this done, please do not let anyone discourage you from making a positive change for your life. I wish you all the best and good luck in whatever you end up doing.