Letting go is hard to do, but I'm doing it!

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Hey all! It's been a while since I've been on, so I'm just checking in. I hope everyone is doing well!

Since the last time I checked in, about 3 weeks or so now, I've been working on something that has been one of the scariest things for me throughout this journey, letting go. I'm almost 15 months post op and since my last weigh-in about 6 weeks ago I've lost 149lbs. I couldn't be happier with the decision I made to have this surgery! It has changed my life in more ways than I ever could have imaged and all of them for the best!

One of the things this small but mighty tool has taught me is that it's in control not me, no matter how hard I fight it, so I need to just let it happen, which for me has been the biggest struggle along this journey but one I know I need to work to over come in order to sustain long-term success. For the last month I've been letting my band do the talking, not the scale, not counting the calories, not measuring etc. Yes, all of things are extremely important especially when starting out and during the weight loss phase so don't ver from that but when you approach maintenance there comes a time when you have to let go, live life and apply what you've learned throughout your journey. I will have to say it hasn't been easy, but slowly I'm getting there. So what do I mean by letting go??? During a year of measuring, weighing, counting etc. I've learned what a portion for me should look like in terms of size and in proper nutrition, so I've stopped all the weighing, measuring and counting and am focusing my effort on making healthy choices, eating when I'm hugry and stopping when I'm satisfied. When I want a treat I eat it and I don't beat myself up over it, I have to constantly keep reminding myself that this is lifestyle change NOT A DIET so there aren't any cheats, it's about finding that balance and learning what you can and can't live without.

Last Friday was my birthday so we took a trip to the lake with some friends and yeah I had some treats but that's ok, it's not something I do everyday and by no means is it in the quantity it was before having this surgery so I'm slowly accepting it's all about moderation and balance, this is something I've always known but couldn't accept. Before I would've beat myself up over this for weeks, and stressed that one cookie or a handful of chips or a slice of cheesecake was going to make me gain weight but then I remember all of the posts on here stating the fact that 3,500 calories equals a lb and that it's all about calories out vs. calories in it made me feel better!

Tomorrow will be the real test for me, I go to see my doctor and weigh-in, it's been six weeks since I've stepped on a scale so yep even after saying all of this I'm still nervous, BUT I know I'm still being monitored so if I need to tweek some things here and there now is the time to do it. Plus I've gone down a size since my last visit so that tells me something too:-)

For the first time in oh forever, I actually posted pics on FB of me in a bathing suite and I wasn't a bit embarrassed so that right there makes this ALL worth it.

[2muchfun 8,927]

You don't own a scale? Now that would stress me out!

Looking forward to what the doc has to say. Keep us informed?

[enjoythetime 1,457]

@@2muchfun nope I don't own a scale. I knew going into this that I would be on that thing and obsessing over every little movement constantly so I felt it best just to throw it away and only weigh in at my Dr., however with that said and with me trying to figure out this whole balancing act I may have to go get one just so I can keep up with what's happening.

Thanks I will. Wish me luck!!:-)

[dawalsh 919]

You don't own a scale? Now that would stress me out! Looking forward to what the doc has to say. Keep us informed?

Me too! LOL!

[Lady VS 1,147]

Awesome testiment of what living the banded life means. Congratulations on losing 149 lbs. That's impressive. Continued success

[Bama53 214]

Thanks for sharing!!! Good luck:)

[blondegal_ 1,028]

I'm not at goal yet (15 more pounds!) but I stopped counting calories about four months ago. And I've continued to lose. I just couldn't do it anymore. I knew I couldn't do it forever. That I had to figure out how to really LIVE with my band. And yes my weight loss slowed down. But I'm so much less stressed. And for the most part food has very little control over me.

So I do relate to what the OP wrote. There's so much out there about post-op, getting fills, finding the green zone, but not much about just living life. I think that's why there aren't many long timers that post. You reach a point where you just have to figure yourself out.