Dr. Jalil Illan with Baja Bariatrics and Omar Acosta - A Warning

[*susan* 1,709]

And here is another thought, TRAVELMEGO, if you are "just asking questions" because you haven't been yet, then instead of looking for new ways to distract from the real issues or attack me, how about asking some valid, intelligent questions. Two of the victims have posted here, they might respond if you don't act like you are bullying them. Maybe ask them questions about what situations you should avoid, what would they do different? Questions that will actually help you.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Except I have never met Omar and have spoken to him for maybe 4 mins total. I have still been asking questions. It is disingenuous to lump everyone who might ask questions and/or disagree with you or your methods or goals into some fan club. I consider it pretty bullying to try to 'take down' a surgeon who you have never spoken to.

So why not ask questions of the victims instead of Susan? It's clear to me that you are not going to believe a word she says and really, it's their experience that matters the most. It's also clear that you are determined to have surgery with Illan no matter what. More power to you, I say! It's obvious that he is a great surgeon and I'd bet that his coordinator will now be forced to be on his best behavior. It's a win/win for his upcoming surgeries which really is the point of this thread -- to stop the inappropriate behavior and protect the patients.

[Travelmego 235]

Hmm, I didn't see you naming any one in the 'fan club' in that post.  

 

For me it is about alleged victims AND your goals and methods.  But I am glad to see you acknowledge that not everyone who questions you and/or disagrees with your goals and methods is merely some fan girl out to trash the women you speak of. 

 

 

In regards to your last statement which you posted while I was typing this reply:  I asked you questions to ascertain your credibility - which you ignored.  I have yet to become fully convinced these women who have spoken on this thread are victims rather than willing FORMER participants who deliberately RETURNED to Mexico for their affairs. 

 

A warning of a playboy or cad - ok. I thank them for the warning. A label of victim of a predator - not so much- from what I have heard. I have talked to one lady (not on this board) who had a minor makeout session with him when she returned to visit him. I asked her very specifically if she felt preyed upon and she said not at all.  She was mad how it ended and doesn't like and is angry at Omar for that - but she said it was completely mutual and consensual.  

 

Do I think it is unprofessional for Omar to date former patients (and apparently they were former patients since these things happened when they deliberately returned to visit him)? Yes I do, but it is certainly not in the realm of molesting patients under anesthesia which was what the original post led many to believe you were saying even if you didn't state that explicitly.   

 

What really bothers me though is the stated goal to destroy Dr. Illan when you have not spoken to him. I think that is very unfair. 

 

Lipstick lady - I have never bullied these women on this thread nor anywhere else in any manner what so ever, nor would I. Please don't lump me in with those who may have. 

Edited July 15, 2014 by Travelmego

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Never for a moment was there any implication that the inappropriate behavior was done while the patient was under anesthesia or passed out on the bed.  It's bizarre to me that *anyone* would jump to such an outrageous conclusion when that wasn't even alluded to.  If I missed it, please show me where such a preposterous idea was even brought up by ANYONE other than you.

Neither victim (and yes, they are victims) took less than full accountability for their role in this debacle.  Was the wrong doing on both sides?  Absolutely.  That said, the heavier responsibility lies firmly in the lap of the practice.  An easy analogy?  If my husband were to have an affair with another woman, it would be 99.9% his fault.  It is his responsibility to keep it in his pants (despite being a "man with urges" -- still chortling about that one).  The woman in this scenario is "wrong", too --if she knew he was married-- but she has no allegiance to me or my family nor did she take vows of fidelity.  The victims in this real life scenario are the other women.  They knew they were doing something illicit (and probably knew it wasn't the best idea deep down inside) but they were under no obligation to act with any type of medical ethics as was the coordinator.

 

Excuse his behavior all you want and blame the victims here until the cows come home.  Anyone with any sense of logic and a solid foundation of ethics will acknowledge that the  wrong doing, while on both sides, was full the responsibility of the man who was obligated to keep his patients safe.

Edited July 15, 2014 by LipstickLady

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Lipstick lady - I have never bullied these women on this thread nor anywhere else in any manner what so ever, nor would I. Please don't lump me in with those who may have. 

 

Never did I call you a bully.  Please don't imply that I did.

[Travelmego 235]

You know what Lipstick lady, I am certainly not excusing the situation - I think it is a dumb thing to date former patients - the same way I think co-workers dating is not that bright.  If this stuff happened while in the hospital under anesthesia ....definitely totally not cool and would be illegal - but that is not the case here.

 

And yes, several people have mentioned about getting the impression that he was somehow molesting people while under anesthesia (or the like). 

 

 

Edited:  I edited out the researching medical ethics of support staff dating former patients because I am too tired to do any research. I also edited a run on sentence or two. 

Edited July 30, 2014 by Travelmego

[InfiniteButterfly 438]

All I can say after reading this thread is

1) I'm sorry to the women who were personally affected by the unprofessional behavior of this coordinator.

2) Slut-shaming and victim blaming is NOT okay. I don't give two flying f**ks about whether you know or don't know the victims involved, not a single person has the right to blame them. The fact that they were consenting adults really isn't germaine: they were taken advantage of during a vulnerable time in their lives. I can only hope that if any of these bullies, fangirls or others who seem to be victim blaming have something similar happen, that they aren't immediately called out and bashed because they fell for a line during a vulnerable time in their lives.

3) "He's a man" is absolutely no excuse for this behavior.

I don't know Susan. I don't know the victims. I have zero personal stakes in this, other than I have been a victim of this type of abuse and I have been told it was my fault. It took a boatload of counseling to realize that it wasn't my fault. Blaming the victims and trying to bury the issue only insures that there will be more victims.

Just because a lot of people had good experiences with this coordinator/this clinic doesn't invalidate the few people who had not-good experiences. It means that more people don't fit his victim profile than do.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

You know what Lipstick lady,  I coud be wrong but I actually I don't think there is any medical ethic in the usa covering an administrative support staff dating a former patient. I will have to research it. I am certainly not excusing the situation - I think it is a dumb thing to date former patients - the same way I think co-workers dating is not that bright.  If this stuff happened while in the hospital definitely totally not cool - but that doesn't seem to be the case here as it seems to have happened later when they returned to visit HIM (not as a patient).

 

And yes, several people have mentioned the scenario that I mentioned about the impression that people got that he was somehow molesting people while under anesthesia (or the like). 

You must have missed the post where MX said her incident occurred during her initial surgery, not her revisit for plastics. She took it down but hopefully she will reconsider and repost.

 

There may not be a written code against what he did, but you better believe any doctor worth his weight would not allow this behavior.

 

Please show me where it was implied that the behaviors occurred while the patient was under. Other that your inference, I don't see it.

[MXtransformed 23]

<p>You know what Lipstick lady, I coud be wrong but I actually I don't think there is any medical ethic in the usa covering an administrative support staff dating a former patient. I will have to research it. I am certainly not excusing the situation - I think it is a dumb thing to date former patients - the same way I think co-workers dating is not that bright. If this stuff happened while in the hospital definitely totally not cool - but that doesn't seem to be the case here as it seems to have happened later when they returned to visit HIM (not as a patient).</p> <p> </p> <p>And yes, several people have mentioned the scenario that I mentioned about the impression that people got that he was somehow molesting people while under anesthesia (or the like). </p>

. Let me clarify something for you Travelmego, what happened to me did take place when I was there for my sleeve and not on a return visit. I did go back to Tijuana, but not it was to have another surgery, he and I were not even communicating any more. I did stay at the same hotel because it is safe, nice and close to the hospital I was using. However I was not prepared for the fact that he has keys or pass cards rather to these rooms. Imagine my surprise to walk into my room one evening only to find him there.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

 

<p>You know what Lipstick lady, I coud be wrong but I actually I don't think there is any medical ethic in the usa covering an administrative support staff dating a former patient. I will have to research it. I am certainly not excusing the situation - I think it is a dumb thing to date former patients - the same way I think co-workers dating is not that bright. If this stuff happened while in the hospital definitely totally not cool - but that doesn't seem to be the case here as it seems to have happened later when they returned to visit HIM (not as a patient).</p> <p> </p> <p>And yes, several people have mentioned the scenario that I mentioned about the impression that people got that he was somehow molesting people while under anesthesia (or the like). </p>

. Let me clarify something for you Travelmego, what happened to me did take place when I was there for my sleeve and not on a return visit. I did go back to Tijuana, but not it was to have another surgery, he and I were not even communicating any more. I did stay at the same hotel because it is safe, nice and close to the hospital I was using. However I was not prepared for the fact that he has keys or pass cards rather to these rooms. Imagine my surprise to walk into my room one evening only to find him there.

 

<p>You know what Lipstick lady, I coud be wrong but I actually I don't think there is any medical ethic in the usa covering an administrative support staff dating a former patient. I will have to research it. I am certainly not excusing the situation - I think it is a dumb thing to date former patients - the same way I think co-workers dating is not that bright. If this stuff happened while in the hospital definitely totally not cool - but that doesn't seem to be the case here as it seems to have happened later when they returned to visit HIM (not as a patient).</p> <p> </p> <p>And yes, several people have mentioned the scenario that I mentioned about the impression that people got that he was somehow molesting people while under anesthesia (or the like). </p>

. Let me clarify something for you Travelmego, what happened to me did take place when I was there for my sleeve and not on a return visit. I did go back to Tijuana, but not it was to have another surgery, he and I were not even communicating any more. I did stay at the same hotel because it is safe, nice and close to the hospital I was using. However I was not prepared for the fact that he has keys or pass cards rather to these rooms. Imagine my surprise to walk into my room one evening only to find him there.

Thank you for sharing your story. I think you are very brave to do so under the circumstances here.

[MXtransformed 23]

.

 

Susan, this is very important information that I did not know about, and yes the story Omar tells about how he and Dr Illan became business partners is indeed a fairy tale. He paints quite a different picture about his last employer and of coarse he makes himself out to be "saint Omar"

[Chubtastic 21]

I read something once that said ppl create their own storms and want cry when it starts raining. I have no sympathy for a person who steps out on there spouse you stood up before God and witnesses and said "for better or for worse in sickness and in health" if you are not happy in the Marriage then try to fix the problem if you can't then get a divorce don't have an affair and then cry that you were wronged by your one night stand or lover, you wronged your husband, you broke his trust you put him at risk lord knows how many women omar was with you could have contracted something you can't shake. I have no illusions that having a mentally unstable husband is easy but it isnt an excuse to cheat. I also don't feel bad for the women who were douped into thinking they actually had a relationship with this man outside of sex your a big girl you got played by player it happens to the best of us no need to bring out the pitch forks and torches. But if someone was forced or touched without there permission they need seek legal action and Yes ppl should be made aware of that. From what i hear Omar does not have a life outside of his job so I can't imagine meeting women is easy so i can see how flings with women he meets thur work could happen. Either way I think its safe to say Omar should probably stop hooking up with patients or atleast tell them upfront this is a strictly casual thing I'm not looking for forever.

[woo woo 872]

I read something once that said ppl create their own storms and want cry when it starts raining. I have no sympathy for a person who steps out on there spouse you stood up before God and witnesses and said "for better or for worse in sickness and in health" if you are not happy in the Marriage then try to fix the problem if you can't then get a divorce don't have an affair and then cry that you were wronged by your one night stand or lover, you wronged your husband, you broke his trust you put him at risk lord knows how many women omar was with you could have contracted something you can't shake. I have no illusions that having a mentally unstable husband is easy but it isnt an excuse to cheat. I also don't feel bad for the women who were douped into thinking they actually had a relationship with this man outside of sex your a big girl you got played by player it happens to the best of us no need to bring out the pitch forks and torches. But if someone was forced or touched without there permission they need seek legal action and Yes ppl should be made aware of that. From what i hear Omar does not have a life outside of his job so I can't imagine meeting women is easy so i can see how flings with women he meets thur work could happen. Either way I think its safe to say Omar should probably stop hooking up with patients or atleast tell them upfront this is a strictly casual thing I'm not looking for forever.

 

For pete's sake what do her marriage vows have to do with the issue at hand here? Really not relevant, sorry. More sl ut shaming I'm afraid.

[*susan* 1,709]

Agreed. Her marriage vows are completely irrelevant here. In addition, your spiritual and/or religious beliefs may not be the same as hers. This is not about her and her marriage. This is about a man using his job to prey upon woman when they are at their most vulnerable.

[vsgblond 10]

i am new here, but have been reading posts constantly for the last 2 months...to choose a surgeon. 

 

1st choice, unfortunately passed away. i read some kind of ranting from the original poster about not going to him because she found a complication (years later?).  i disregarded that information.

 

now i am looking at dr. ilan. this is not helpful. this sounds like a bunch of high school girls fighting over who got dumped.  i'm not looking for my coordinator to be my best friend. unless something inappropriate happened while under anesthesia, i don't think any of this is relevant to his medical practice. was necessary medicine withheld for sexual favors? did they refuse to take them to the border unless they had sex? who is thinking about hooking up in mexico after bariatric surgery?????

 

i have spoken with omar, and frankly he sounds pretty balanced compared to a couple of other coordinators in this price point

 

i am not looking to go to Tijuana for a vacation, or to party like i am 18. i am looking for the most competent surgeon to do the job. 

 

i don't care so much about their romantic lives, as much as....how much weight have they lost? did they have any complications?