basics for beginning

[HYCIERRA 144]

Hi. So tomorrow is my final pre-op appointment with my surgeon. Surgery is set for next Tuesday the 8th. Super excited, not an ounce of nervousness, but I've been wondering about silly stuff- for instance- I'm quite confident I will have excessive skin- anyone have any suggestions on how to hide this extra skin? Spanx or another undergarment that you've had good luck with? I don't want something that is extra control and confining, just something that provides a little "damage control". Also- I've been thinking about my goals and milestones. Did any of you ever go out and buy a super cute outfit before surgery in several sizes smaller as additional motivation? I've not done this, but was thinking about it.

and then my final question- I told my mom I was having surgery- she was not a fan of the idea and to say it safely, she's uneducated about the process , procedure, benefits and consequences, therefore she wasn't very supportive. Knowing this- I've not given her any additional updates on my process (she lives 500 miles away, so she's not involved in my daily doings). I'm contemplating on not telling her when my surgery is beforehand just because I know she is a worrywart. I don't want to stress her out about this, but I also know that if I tell her afterwards, she'll probably have her feelings hurt. I'm sure some of you can relate- any suggestions on how you handled this and the response Mom gave you?

[DaronB 103]

My family, mom and dad specifically, were not a huge fan of my decision. Me and my family are Christians, so we've all turned it over to God. I pray daily for Gods will.

My parents are mostly skittish for 2 reasons, the main being my moms boss' daughter nearly died from major complications and to this day has many problems, but she's in the minority. Like 1 in 1,000.

The second reason is that I'm on the lower end of surgery requirements. My BMI just is a 40 and they think I could "do it on my own". But I have at least 100lbs to lose and the fact that tried for 5+ years to lose it and can't is frustrating.

Like I had to remind myself and my parents, we're (you, me, them, us) adults. It's our (mine and yours) decision. Diabetes, heart trouble/attacks, blood pressure etc all run in my family. I'm already on blood pressure medicine, have high cholesterol, and my A1C is elevated. It's either have this surgery and risk complications for better health, or do nothing, continue to struggle, and wait for something to happen.

I basically educated my mom on the process, told her about the requirements for surgery, had her google search my surgeon, who is considered one of, if not the best surgeons in NC. Talk to your mom and tell her. I'm sure she'd much rather find out before the fact then after.

[ferguson23024 30]

We have the same surgery date, so congratulations to becoming a new you.

Secondly, I would speak with her a explain to her about your surgery. It is best to be honest and upfront. If she then makes the choice not to be supportive, it will be her problem because your health comes first. This is no different than if you were having an issue with your gallbladder. You would take corrective matters. Obesity is a disease and this surgery is a tool to help us. I think so often WLS receives negative stigma because people fail to educate the self. I think if you talk with her, she will understand and be supportive.

[Ginger Snaps 1,323]

My mom and dad also live far away. I told them I was having surgery to repair my hiatal hernia (which was true) but left out the part about bypass. I intended to tell her the night before surgery so that I wouldn't feel conflicted about not telling her the whole truth. But, my dad had some really bad health situation come up and got out of the hospital after a 10 day stay the day before my surgery. When I tried to tel her that night what I was doing, she wasn't in the mood to talk and was still concerned about my dad so I chose not to say anything.

I was also concerned about hearing "you're not that big" because my BMI was 35 but I had comorbidities, too. I will tell her the next time I see her and explain why I didn't tell her before but she will probably still be hurt a little.

Since your mom knows you're having the surgery, maybe just call her up the night before and let her know it will be the next day. That way, she can't really try to talk you out of it and she won't have to worry too much in advance.

[DaronB 103]

I can relate with you, Ginger Snaps. I constantly hear "you're not that big" or "you don't look big enough for surgery". That's interesting because a person my age and height should weigh anywhere from 100-140lbs less than what I do. I don't have a huge support group, but things are getting better and people are accepting my decision. I'm not turning back now, I met my deductible today LOL!

[pik 262]

What I hear from some in my family is that I can do it on my own, and I have. I lost 125 pounds and got down nearly to my goal weight.

I actually looked at some smaller sized clothing but I don't think I want to buy anything to try and fit into later.

I have no idea what my body is going to look like after the surgery. I don't know if I am going to wear the same 'type' of clothing.

There are so many nice clothes that thinner people can wear that just do not look right on larger people. I am one of the people who try not to wear clothes that do not flatter my figure.

One thing I will be buying next year is a wedding dress. I can't even picture a smaller me in a wedding dress. All I keep seeing is this bigger me and the type of dress I would wear at this size.

All of that could change!

Truthfully I would like to try and exercize and not have as much extra skin left over, but I know that i will have some.

When I lost it before I didn't have it. I think the rate you lose it with wls is much faster and therefore you have the excess skin.

I am not looking forward to that at all.