Very disappointed!

[supremeh 30]

How is it lazy? A lot more effort goes into losing weight than it does to sit on the couch and eat all day, weightloss surgery or not.

Exactly!!! I'm on a supervised diet that I hate, can only have 1200 calories a day, keep in mind I haven't had surgery yet so I can easily eat 1200 calories per meal!!

[Katcloudshepherd 630]

Hello everyone,

I'm traveling to Michigan next month and have a slight amount of dread. You see, I didn't tell my 2 brothers or other family members about the surgery. My 2 sisters know and have been very supportive. I haven't been to Michigan since 2009. I don't know what kind of reaction I'm going to get.

It helps that I've lost 84 pounds and I've gone from a size 28 to an 18--which is very loose fitting on me. I'm almost into a size 16. I haven't been a size 16 since I was in the Army! Holy Cow, I just realized that while I'm typing this!

I'm trying to brace myself for the reactions I'm going to receive.

This is NOT an easy way out, lazy, or any of the other multiple negative ways that some people characterize it.

This trip down the loser's highway has been much tougher for me than even Basic Training!

Kathleen

[supremeh 30]

Congrats on your loss!!! I pray that your family will be happy for you and glad to see you!!!!

[enjoythetime 1,457]

There are always going to be those people who have something negative to say, whether its because of jealousy or just because they're jerks. You can't control or change anyone but YOU, so let them think what they will and take their negativity and use it as your motivation! I've said this many times, but I was one of those who said I would NEVER have WLS because it was the easy way out, I was so mis-informed and felt there was no self satisfaction, boy was that the biggest bunch of BS I've ever told myself!! Now, I'm proud that I've hda WLS and I tell everyone who asks, what have you done, I tell them I got the lapband, I've gotten some looks but overall most people have been very supportive. It's hard to deny it's effectiveness or find something negative to say to someone who's lost more than they weigh now:-) Plus I think it's all in how you say it to them, if you hestitate and shly say I had ladpand (or whatver WLS it is) then that tends to give them an opening to comment how they want, but if you if shout it from the top of the mountain in a no BS kinda way people know not to go there:-)

Give it to them girl and watch them see how wrong they are!

Best wishes!!!

Edited June 11, 2014 by enjoythetime

[Olarance75 215]

Ignore them....that's what I did when my aunts attempted to say anything to me. I do what's best for me...point blank and the period. Your going to do great. He'll if it was that easy to lose weight we all would be thin. I've been thin and I've been large and I needed help. Don't be ashamed to admit that u need more than what ur capable of doing on your own.

[Moxy 58]

I have only had one negative person in my family. My mother, who is overweight and diabetic, she doesnt follow any of her doctors orders for her sugar. she is on shots and thinks they are there so she can have sugar. Im constantly educating to her about what she eats and she just says everyone needs sugar..

When i told her i was having surgery all she said was, everyone i have ever known that had that gained it all back within 5 years why are you wasting time on it. It hurt knowing she thinks im going to be a failure before i even had the surgery. It hurts knowing she wont be around long enough to see that i WILL make this tool work and keep the weight off if she doesnt change her eating habits.

I had my surgery in november, I didnt want to become her and have to rely on shots in order to eat. i want to be around for my kids for a long long time.

Thankfully my dad tells me about once a week that he is proud of my decision because babies need their moms. My sisters for telling me i'm beautiful and inspiring, and my friends who cannot believe my determination to get healthy.

My advice, surround yourself with positive people, try to educate the ignorant ones, the ones who think its just a smaller stomach and you can eat whatever you want still. The ones who think we are cheating to get skinny, instead of sacrificing fat and sugar for high Protein so we can get healthy and live longer. Some, like my mom wont ever get it. No matter how much we explain.

[Heather_Feather 24]

Most people who are unsupportive are either jealous or uneducated (and therefore afraid for you.) I didn't tell many people before surgery because I didn't want any negativity. Afterwards, I'll tell any one and answer any questions they have about it. A lot of people are too cowardly to say anything negative to me, and I wouldn't care any way. Like others said, it's YOUR journey. Be proud of yourself for making the choice to be happy and healthier.

[dawalsh 919]

It's your choice not theirs! Don't let any negativity stop you from doing something positive for yourself! This has been the hardest journey I have ever been on and I'm 18 months post surgery. I don't care what people think because I know what I'm doing is for a better me!

[BeagleLover 1,020]

It's very sad that she doesn't want to live. It must be very hard for you and your family to watch her self destruct.

[bikrchk 1,313]

Sorry you are having this experience, especially with family. I just don't get the "that's cheating" mentality. For cheating to have taken place, there must be a winner and a loser and YOU taking action to improve YOUR health diminishes NO ONE!

I used to be lazy. It hurt to move. I used to sit on the couch, or on the sofa and play video games or watch TV all the time. Now, I get up at 4:30 every morning because I love the way an hour on my bike makes me feel! I walk stairs voluntarily and choose to be more active because I can and because I'm grateful for my health.

I had a disease that was killing me like it killed my dad at 54. There was a procedure available to help me fight that disease, so I took it and am ever so grateful for my new found health!

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

@@par1959, I do disagree. I've struggled mightily all of my life with overweight and obesity. I was not a loafer. I was addicted to binge eating for a variety of reasons. I starved myself from 305 down to 156 at age 28. I immediately began bouncing back up the scale. Every aspect of my life was tightly controlled and meticulously perfect except my eating. I put myself through college while working full time. I cared for an ailing grandmother, aunt and father until each of them died. As a married woman I was a room mom, and a hands on parent while working part time and later full time. WLS is not making it easy for me to lose weight. It's saving my life by helping me keep the weight off. I wish to God I had been brave enough to do it in my twenties.

Peace.

Edited June 13, 2014 by JustWatchMe

[moonlitestarbrite 902]

I am sure there are those that will disagree, but if one is in their 20's and need this surgery I would consider that person a loafer, but even more so lacking in the skills required to suceed with WLS. Thats my opinion and I'm sticking with it.

i am guessing you are talking about yourself, right? since there isnt anyway for you to know what anyone else's life is like just from seeing how fat they are. so i assume you must mean yourself.

[supremeh 30]

@@par1959, seriously tho? That's a very insensitive thing to say.and it's not true.I'm 30 years old and hope to be having surgery in November or December. I kno a few people who needed this surgery and got it in their twenties.they are not lazy, they have a disease.I've struggled with my weight for about 20 years. I was an athlete in school and still pretty heavy, by no means am I lazy.How are you on this site with such negative things to say?? That was the whole reason for my post, and then you get on here and say that????? Please don't comment on my post if that's what you have to offer,I came here because it's a safe place, please and thank you!!!

[enjoythetime 1,457]

I am sure there are those that will disagree, but if one is in their 20's and need this surgery I would consider that person a loafer, but even more so lacking in the skills required to suceed with WLS. Thats my opinion and I'm sticking with it.

@@par1959

That was a completely uncalled for statement!!

You know what they say about opinions??? They're like a $$ holes and everybody's got one but that doesnt mean you need to be one!!!!

In case u missed the memo, this is a SUPPORT forum so if you can't be supportive perhaps you should just move on.

[blondiebabs 214]

@@supremeh Do not pay attention to people's negativity and crappy opinions. People will drain you of your emotions and damper your spirit. No one knows your journey but you.