Going It Alone - No Help After Surgery

[blondiebabs 214]

Hello!

I tried to search and find if this subject had been addressed in the past and was unable to find anything.

I'm in the beginning stages of this process, I go next Friday 6/13 for my initial seminar and will set the first appointment with the surgeon then. I do not have any family in the state where I live, and I don't have a whole lot of local friends that do not have their own family obligations. I'm curious how difficult others found it coming home from the hospital after their surgery and not having any help around the house??

I have seen lots of youtube videos where people talk about having their families help them, but no one really talks about dealing with it on their own. I have a large dog (gentle giant) that I will have to take out about 3 times a day, but besides that I wouldn't have any other things that I forsee going on.

Thanks in advance for any feedback/advice.

[Forsythia 882]

I'm married, but my husband was at work most of the entire week I was at home. So essentially I was on my own. I did not have problems doing normal things like showering or going out on walks. I did easy stuff like laundry, but no heavy duty chores. Going up and down stairs took more effort than anyting else, really. I will say put out there that my first four weeks post op have been really easy - really pain free and textbook. You can't assume your recovery is going to be the same way. If you are worried, ask a good friend to check in on you - either by calling or stopping by.

[Heather_Feather 24]

I'm not allowed to lift anything over 25 lbs. for 6 weeks. (I asked my doc. and this included walking my dog because he pulls.) If your dog doesn't pull, it should be fine. I don't have a lot of help either. My suggestions would be to have at least 1 freind you can call to vent. Also, before surgery, get your things in order: Pay the bills that need to be paid for 2 weeks after surgery, get the house and laundry in order, and have all of your grocery shopping done ahead of time. It'll be rough but not too bad. Best of luck to you!!!!

[gottagonow 82]

I had no help. My family isn't here and I didn't tell friends. I started feeling like I really could have used their help that 3rd and 4th day. I think I still had the morphine in my system that second day. It wasn't great, but you get through it; there's no other choice! And frankly, you can do what you need to do without assistance. By the 7th day, I felt so much better.

[blondiebabs 214]

Thank you ladies! That is very helpful. That is the main thing I've kind of had some anxiety about, not knowing how hard it is to get around and do stuff. =) Lucky I live in a 1 story building, have a dog park about 30 ft or so away from me, and my dog is old and slow enough that he doesn't typically pull. I really appreciate the great tips too =D

[dariablah 12]

My boyfriend left me and moved out a month before my surgery, so I was alone through the whole thing. Sadly he was my emergency contact at the hospital, and I really didnt even have one. My daughter is 20, so she drove me but she works and doesnt live me me. Luckily the surgery and recovery was easier than I thought. But I did it alone. Physically, it was easy, emotionally not so easy.

[blondiebabs 214]

Oh my gosh @@dariablah, that is rough. I'm sorry that happened, but I'm glad the physical part wasn't too bad. I hope you are doing better emotionally now. I know those things can take the longest to heal from.

[BeagleLover 1,020]

For the dog, you might look into a dog walking service. Another possibility, depending on how your house is set up is to install a flap door to the backyard so the dog can go in and out on their own. You can have a Lixit installed on a faucet *inside* of the house (so you don't have to deal with freezing issues in the winter). The dog licks it, a valve goes up and the dog gets fresh Water any time it wants. That way you don't have to lift Water bowls. I can't remember the name of it offhand, Gentle Leader?, but there is a leash that fits around the dog's face/jaw that makes it easier to handle the dog without being pulled too hard.

The surgeon will instruct you on what you need to eat and drink and when to do that. For example, for "Clear liquids," you can choose water, diluted fruit or veggie juices, broth-based Soups, flavored water, unsweetened tea, coffee, Crystal Light, sugar free beverages, Jello, popsicles and applesauce. For "full liquids" you might have hot cereals (i.e., oatmeal, grits, cream of wheat), creamed Soups, yogurt, pudding, milk, custard and sherbet. Some people drink read-to-drink Protein shakes or add Protein powder to up their intake.

I've been told no caffeine after surgery because it stimulates your body to produce more stomach acid. Also, it's best not to drink anything carbonated.

Those are the basics. On this site, you'll find many suggestions on what Protein Powder tastes best and how to make what you're eating taste better.

Best luck to you and your pooch!

[Ginger Snaps 1,323]

I'll be pretty much on my own... my 20 year old son breezes in and out of the house all the time and he'll probably run to the store for me if I need something but I wouldn't exactly consider him a lot of "help".

Funny you mentioned the dog -- when the insurance nurse called to tell me my surgery was approved my dog was barking in the background and she asked me if I was going to have help with him or what I would do with him. He's big and she said she would worry if he would jump up or if I had to walk him where he might pull. He is a jumper and he does pull but I have a backyard to let him out in so I don't have to walk him. He'll probably just have to have some crate time until I feel strong enough to get out of his way if he tries to jump on me. So, it might be good to try to have someone to walk the dog for you at least for a few days. You never know when they might see a squirrel or something and yank you around.

[blondiebabs 214]

@@BeagleLover unfortunately I do not have a yard, I live in an apartment, but luckily I do have a patio and can just hook him to a lead right next to the door so he can go potty if all else fails. I will definately be looking into some local walkers. Good idea about the faucet. Thanks for all the tips and advice!

@@Ginger Snaps lol @ the son comment! =) Luckily my dog isn't a jumper, however I won't ever know when he will see a varmit or one of his girlfriends, those are the only times he gets super excited, he doesn't pull super hard when he does pull but I'm thinking more and more a dog walker for a few days would be a good idea. =)

[Roo101769 742]

Not only did I have to do most everything alone, I have a five year old who I am the single mother of! Now I will admit the day I came home from work my nephew and his wife hung out and helped me a bit, but after that I was on my own. My daughter stayed with a sitter for a couple days after I came home. ( I was released on a Wednesday late afternoon and I picked her up Friday around 5pm) I wasn't supposed to drive, but I had no choice. I have TWO larger sized dogs but fortunately I can let them out in the yard to do their business. It was tough, yes. But not impossible. I was back at work 9 days post op. Wish things had been different, but thems the breaks. I did what I had to do and I survived. Good luck to you!!!

[Roo101769 742]

I meant to say the day I came home from the hospital in the above post...LOL Can you tell it is Friday afternoon?

[blondiebabs 214]

LOL @@Roo101769 TGIF for sure! I'm determined to do what it takes, and everyone's comments have definately helped my anxiety about it. I kept thinking I know other people have done this alone, I'm not reinventing the wheel here.

[marfar7 1,533]

While I COULD have done it by myself, who would I have to b**** to when I was in pain? Who would pick up my panties which I dropped on the floor? And again, who would I b***** to when I was so bored?

In 2009, after my lapband surgery, I was single. My brother in law came to stay for a week. I liked having the company but I really didn't NEED him. 10 mths ago when I had my sleeve revision, I'm now married for 3 yrs. So, so glad I had someone around. Not only to pick stuff up that I dropped but also just for company. I guess I could've done it alone, but wouldn't want to.

And like I said : Who would I have to b***** to?

Oh, and I have a small dog that we kept at a friends house for a few days after coming home. I was afraid she'd jump on my stomach. And she did. After a few days I was much more tolerant of her jumping tho...

[blondiebabs 214]

@@marfar7 you are hilarious! I guess I better invest into one of those lobster claw grabber things, I can't be having a panty crisis!