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When people ask, do you tell them about WLS?



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WEll, after the reactions I got from my sister and others I don't think I will tell many folks. My grown children are all supportive and that is good enough for me. I will wait and see 'who' needs to know.

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It's funny... I just started dating a new guy and we were talking about losing weight and getting healthier and how we're working on that. I told him I've lost 60 pounds this year (without saying it has been in 4 months). He told me his ex-wife had WLS a long time ago and has gained a lot of it back. He also said he had gone through the process to have surgery himself but he started following the diet and has lost over 60 pounds, putting his BMI below the surgery level. So, I decided to 'fess up and tell him I had surgery. He laughed at me and told me he knew I had because of my diet... he recognized the Protein obsession and not drinking during meals. :)

So sometimes, you may not have to tell people... they may know already!

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I agree that It is absolutely your right to tell or not to tell or somewhere in between.

I am telling everyone now and I am just starting my pre-surgery weight loss program so my surgery won't be until maybe the end of February!

Out of all the ones I have told I have gotten many success stories and I have gotten two stories that were not successes. But every single one has said "I wish you luck". After one of the ones that had an unsuccessful story and I started talking and comparing notes he actually said he was going to pull out his notes where he had been researching getting WLS but got decided it was not for him and start looking into it again.

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I haven't had my surgery yet, but I've pretty much already told all the family members, friends, and co-workers I intend to tell.

I may change my mind post-op, but for now I think if I'm asked by someone who I don't really feel comfortable telling I'm just going to say: "I was having some health issues and now I'm following a medically supervised diet."

And it's a 100 percent true to boot. Due to my morbid obesity I am having medical issues, and I will be following a medically supervised both pre and post op.

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I like many of you chose to limit the number of people I told. I told almost all of my fellow management staff, my wife, and one friend. My wife on the other hand told her family because she felt they needed to be aware. I ended up being okay with it because I still was not the one that told them. In the long run it makes sense for us. We spend the holidays with them and now I don't have to make excuses about what I'm eating. Everyone else at work thinks I'm having back surgery because I didn't want to hear the comments.

One thing I learned from my WLS roommate is that I may end up sharing information with my staff because they will think I came down with a serious illness. So I have shared with my management team who know that if they start hearing people be concerned about my health for them to let me know. I will make my decision on how proceed from there.

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I am so glad someone posted about this. My surgery is on Nov 10th and being just 2 weeks out, I've contemplated about this all along. Really, as of today, only 5 people in my life know that I'm about to do this. The comments about being "such a personal decision" are SO right on. I had a really hard time telling people. Not because I am not sure about my decision, but because it is hard to re-explain, re-defend the decision. And it's like you want people to know, look, I didn't come to this overnight. This was a long process of education and decisions. I really like the suggestions of "thank you" and then giving some general answers of diet, exercise, etc. I'm sure people at work will figure it out - I'm taking the 2 weeks off work and since I'm their Supervisor, a peer of mine is being flown in to fill in for me. I know they'll figure / know that I'm clearly off for a medical reason, coming back with some obvious weight off will be telling. But the fact is, they'll think what they think. I am grateful for others sharing their same feelings on this!

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So, I had a lap band that had to be removed and later had RNY. The first time, I told people that I'd had weight loss surgery. The majority of people reacted positively. A few of my overweight friends acted like I had taken the easy way out. Lol, trust me the misery of that lap band was no easy anything!

Of course, when the band came out I couldn't maintain the weight-loss. I hated having everyone know I had had WLS and had gotten fat again anyway. So, with the RNY, I have opted to respond to questions about how I'm losing weight with "I'm trying not to eat anything that tastes really good" and a laugh. People who have known me for a long time have seen me yoyo many times and so if they comment that I'm losing weight I just say, "yeah, this time" and we commiserate about how hard it is to keep it off.

Telling people is a personal preference, really. But, the second time around, I'm keeping it private :)

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I plan on keeping my bypass to myself and husband. I am not even telling the kids. I need to keep my head clear and my eye on the ball. This is high stakes game right now. Emotionally, I don't think I can handle everyone's reactions, feelings and questions. I have spent my entire life giving but not taking care of myself in part because everyone's needs always seemed more important then mine. This time, I am taking care of ME. I may feel differently down the road.

I have no one besides my husband that knows, and at 4 months post surgery, I still have no inclination to tell anyone. It is none of their business. Best wishes for your success. Congratulations on deciding to prioritize yourself!!!

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