Informing People You've had WLS /Lap Band

[UbermenchPosibility 4]

Is it just me or do u get frustrated when telling new people I.e. fsmily, friends, coworkers , etc that you've just had a wls (for me lap band) and they say things like Omg but ur so beautiful , or remember that ur beautiful but good luck!

When I joined the Gym No one ever had that response as if I had had a negative self image.....but because I chose to have lap band surgery for me which was an option to live a healthier life and do things my weight was preventing me from doing these people automatically assume I must have myself. Now I know some do have this issue but that alone is not alone reason u decide to do any type of wls.

Then they follow up with so how much have u lost.... Wait a minute I'm only 7 Days Post-Op, my worry is HEALING. Once that's done i will worry about the numbers.

Uughhhh I'm only 7 Days Post-Op and I find this frustrating. But i won't let them aggravate me.

(I'm sure this is the same for men and women who've had wls)

[JanetteH 80]

Yes - that's happened to me - the reactions are weird. So I haven't told many people! My husband and kids were great and very encouraging. Most other people who knew I had surgery didn't need to know why - so I just said "I had to have some plumbing realigned, and I'm doing well". This is true and also explains why I'm not eating much : ) Haven't even told my mother and brother - they'll just think I've lost weight when I see them in September.

[UbermenchPosibility 4]

Good for you everyone chooses who should know and who shouldn't. For me I've chosen to make a page on IG and track my progress and share some helpful tips with the fellow Wls community, I'm also not ashamed that I had wls it's my body and was my decision and I didn't want to feel like I couldn't be open about it so I've shared. But these uninformed individuals really make me want to shake them lol

Good luck on your journey hun

[Sparklingbeauty53 202]

Top Secret Shhhh! Don't tell a soul. It is no one's business but mine. It is on a need to know basis. Period. I don't talk about my weight and you don't talk to me about it either. It is forbidden. I'll share my age before my weight, wait, no I won't share my weight with anyone for any reason. That was me. That was me for 53 years.

Then one day I decided to have RNY to help myself get healthy. Bottling in my weight amount(keeping a secret), getting bigger and bigger every year, having more and more heath problems each and every year, keeping my weight a secret was really a farce. One look at me and you knew I was an unhealthy over 200 pound mess! It wasn't a secret!

Having RNY has been the best blessing I could ask for. It has helped me take charge of my life, lifestyle and health. I will shout it from the rafters now. I am neither ashamed nor fearful of what anyone thinks because it doesn't matter. What matters is what I feel and think about it now.

I am so proud of my bravery for doing it. I am so proud to say my health in just a few months is already brighter and better. I am proud to say I am morbidly obese but I am doing something about it because it is and always has been all about me! Last year at this time I couldn't even talk about it.

Bottom line- it is a personal thing and the way you handle it is the right way. It is your way!

Edited May 28, 2014 by Sparklingbeauty53

[Wallflower7522 328]

I don't try to hide it, but I don't volunteer it either. If someone asks, I'll tell them, but if someone just says "you look nice, or you've lost weight" I just say thanks.

I have a friend who tells literally everyone she meets and honesty it gets on my damn nerves because she'll also volunteer that info about me too. Her mom knew I was thinking of having this surgery before even my husband did.

[JanetteH 80]

Good for you everyone chooses who should know and who shouldn't. For me I've chosen to make a page on IG and track my progress and share some helpful tips with the fellow Wls community, I'm also not ashamed that I had wls it's my body and was my decision and I didn't want to feel like I couldn't be open about it so I've shared. But these uninformed individuals really make me want to shake them lol

Good luck on your journey hun

Thanks Ubermench! Like you, I share everything here and get a lot of useful advice and support from BP members. A few of my friends are supportive - their attitude is that I'm doing what I need to do to get healthy. The others don't need to know. So glad I found this website!

Sparklingeauty, good for you! We all deal with the comments the best we can. Sounds like you've found your confidence.

Edited May 28, 2014 by JanetteH

[ladykatie_ 117]

I know it's frustrating. Sometimes people will give you that look or say something like, "You are beautiful no matter what." They all assume that I'm uncomfortable with my self image or that I'm depressed about my weight or something. I'm not. In fact, I'm very confident and body positive.

WLS is, for the most part, done for health reasons. Sure, it's nice to be able to shop in the "normal" section of clothing instead of the plus-size part, but honestly the reasons I did my surgery is because I want to be healthy. I want to start a family of my own. I don't want high blood pressure at 26. Etc.

I don't understand why people assume that people who are overweight have this negative self image. Some of us do, of course, but it is never safe to assume things about a person.

Anyways, my course of action is honesty is the best policy. While I don't go around advertising it to every person I've met, I will not hesitate to share my surgery with anyone who asks or I feel needs to know for whatever reason. I post about it on Facebook and Instagram, and actually I get a lot of positive feedback and good support. If anyone has ever doubted my reasons for surgery, I don't know about it nor do I care.

All that matters is the support system that you have. They love you and support you and want you to be the healthiest person you can be!

[Savedbygrace22 28]

Yes - that's happened to me - the reactions are weird. So I haven't told many people! My husband and kids were great and very encouraging. Most other people who knew I had surgery didn't need to know why - so I just said "I had to have some plumbing realigned, and I'm doing well". This is true and also explains why I'm not eating much : ) Haven't even told my mother and brother - they'll just think I've lost weight when I see them in September.

Janet, I like that "plumbing realigned". I will remember that; I had hietal hernia done as well.

Edited May 30, 2014 by Savedbygrace22

[Writerjennifer 107]

I am too open to hide this from people. So far, the responses have been positive. One co-worker asked "but why, you're doing so good" (I have lost 25lbs in the last 6 months or so). I politely explained the rollercoaster weight loss realy is for me and she wished me luck and returned to work.

I only just started sharing, once I was approved and scheduled, so the pool is small at thie point. Both of my daughters are overweight. I want to ask them to join me in this and pursue their own surgery, but one is willfully not dieting, and the other is too confident in herself to be led anywhere she doesnt want to go. So... I hold my tongue. Who knows, maybe seeing my journey will enspire them.

But anyway... my family is supportive, the rest can suck it. lol

[UbermenchPosibility 4]

Thanks guys all ur sharing has really helped me. I really do feel like as long as I'm comfortable with my decision that's all that matters and I have the right fam and friends behind me supporting me and also the wls community.

This has been an amazing beginning to my Journey. I'm 10 days Post-Op op and have lost 20lbs it feels great ....especially getting my diet in and doing my walking until my doctor clears me for more

I wish everyone the best of luck....AND SCREW ANYONE THAT DOESNT APPROVE lol