Not doing well at all :(

[Elaine Mackenzie 0]

Hi all,

I know a lot of you are going to jump down my throat here .. Ie I'm going to die or bust my staples ..

I was sleeved April 22nd .. 2014. Two weeks ago tomorow .. I thought having the sleeve would make me not want to eat .. I was so WRONG

Soon as I got out hospital I was hungry I lasted the first 10 days on liquid and Iv skipped the puréed stage eating very chewed food instead.. Thing is since I had op I feel no restriction.. liquids or chicken or pizza or crisps... I did feel bit full after Greek yoghurt but that's it!

Firstly I'm worried I'm going to die coz I can't stop resist food still... And secondly I worry Iv no restriction at all... Even thought maybe they didn't take my stomach ..

No pain or nausea since the op .. Just three scars and a£5000 dent in my bank balance.

My psyche has referred me to the eating disorder clinic ... I'm unsure how long it will take

I feel so well like I could eat anything I hope I don't give myself a leak ... And I also hope I haven't wasted all that money just to lose 15lbs ... Even had a slight gain this mornng

I believed I'd do well with a sleeve and I was committed but I don't know what happened .. Expected to feel differently bout food but I don't.. I still desire to eat it! Strongly

[Elaine Mackenzie 0]

I was told on my pre op tests I had barrets esophegus ... Which increases my cancer risk by %5 a year.... I'm waiting on my biopsy ... At 26 it's unusual to have it so young... I think maybe anxiety is making me turn to food again ...

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

There is such a thing as head hunger. We use food to fix all our problems..It does not do it.

I would think about the abuse you are doing to your sleeve. You have not even healed yet. Also whatever you thought would happen it is a tool not a miracle fix. You get the sleeve and that is where the real work begins. This is where you start to learn about your new buddy and feed it properly. The pureed stage is important because it is slowly bringing your stomach back to real food.< /p>

You won't be able to fix your body until you fix your brain and the way you see food. Yes you have a new condition to work with but there will always be something to test our resolve to stay true to the program. Some people never lose the hungry feeling. Some people can eat anything and it does not bother them. That does not mean that you should.

Think about why you did this. Why you wanted to improve your health over all and mark this day and tell yourself you can do this.....

Start logging your intake. Put Protein in the front. ( dense Protein ) when you get back on track. Water 64 oz and then add veggies, fruit and complex carbs. There is no way that a person can eat at your stage what you are eating and not have issues. How you feel about food changes when you change. when you learn what the triggers are for you. When you stop using food as the answer to every situation that does not go well.

Your not alone. We are here and will encourage you to start again at your next meal. There is never failure it is a postponement of sorts. Your sleeve is still there...Use it wisely and fix your thinking.....

[AlwaysLorri 31]

"...£5000 dent in my bank balance" - as you pointed out this is costly both time and money. It's an investment in oneself. whatever brought you to making the decision to have the surgery in the first place must be your foundation for moving forward with the commitment. Yes, life gets in the way, some of us may be emotional eaters but you did well the first two weeks. You have to take that gumption and roll with it.

I have not had the surgery yet, but I have been on the pre-op diet for 2 weeks and have another 2 weeks to go. Everyday, when I am down and hungry (I least I think I am or be it head hunger) I look at all of my photos and see that very unhappy person who wants to live a better life. I fill my day with activities that wont allow myself thoughts of food. I only keep what I need such as shakes and Soups - not too appealing or dangerous.

Elaine, I wish you much luck and wellness!

Edited May 5, 2014 by AlwaysLorri

[Fluffnomore 1,235]

Hunger is a basic biological urge. Some people have LESS hunger after the sleeve, but very few have no hunger. That's the first thing. What I will say about my hunger, six months out, is that while I feel compelled to deal with it when I am hungry, it doesn't really take very long to get full. But I think that is because I get better every day at figuring out the difference between true hunger and just wanting to eat.

It is also normal for your bile production to be out of whack. With your BE I would hope you are on some kind of proton pump inhibitor or antacid but if you are not you should request one.

I can't say the rest any better than RJ. You have the power to get yourself back on track. You're maybe not as "in control" as you want to be, but you owe it to yourself to start out each day and try to follow the plan. If Greek yogurt works for you, then eat more of it. A couple of weeks out is not the time to be experimenting with different foods. I was on Clear Liquids for 2 weeks, full liquids for 2 weeks, and pureed and mushy foods for 4 weeks after that. Every surgeon varies in this timetable, but crisps really have no place in your eating plan right now, if ever.

Please be careful and treat this as the crucial post-surgery time that it is. If you had surgery on your leg, you wouldn't put all of your weight on it after two weeks.

[Sleeveless in seattle 208]

At two weeks you are barely starting to heal inside. Your staple line could be numb, causing you to not feel restriction. Or you are past restriction and looking for a "full" feeling that you're not getting. First off, no jumping down your throat. food is obviously a problem for you or you wouldn't have needed this surgery. Most of us are in the same boat...or we shouldn't have gotten the surgery. It does sound as though you have a serious compulsion if you can't follow the post op diet and are already eating pizza and other stuff. Hopefully the wait for the eating disorder clinic is short but until then get as much support as possible. If you "need" to eat something off your plan, phone a friend, play a game, post on here...anything. Don't bring that junk in your house because you obviously can't handle to have it around. Eliminate the temptation so that if you must eat something it is okay for you and your healing tummy. Best wishes, I hope it works out for you.

[Jen35 283]

It really sounds like self-sabotage to me. And I'm not saying that to be judgemental - I know where you are coming from. I have sabotaged myself for years prior to the sleeve. I knew going into this surgery that I had issues with food. I abused it and I abused myself with it. So I started counseling 5 months before getting the sleeve because whether or not I was approved for the surgery, I knew my head had to change in order to have any lasting positive results. I am one year out and I'd been seeing my counselor EVERY week since (until she recently moved out of the country). I still feel some of my old issues resurfacing so I'm going to have to find a new counselor. My point is - get some help with these issues. You aren't alone in feeling this way or having these issues with food. But to be successful and, most importantly, not physically hurt yourself, you need to find out why you behave this way and figure out how to love yourself. You are worth the effort to take care of yourself. I honestly do not think I would be were I am without the couseling.

[Miss Mac 6,262]

Elaine , Dear...........I am picking up on a couple of things, here. One is that you are having a nice gentle recovery so far, but number two is that you are not taking advantage of it. My doc moved me through the process quickly...soft foods at two weeks and regular but well chewed food at 3 1/2 weeks. But the differences are that you are having issues with volume and with poor choices. I hope you follow up on that reference to the eating disorders doctor so that you can get some clinical help.

Obviously, you're here to ask for advice based on our experiences, so here I go. One of the first and easiest actions you can take is to eat your Protein first. I guarantee that you cannot eat as much roast chicken as you can crisps, but the chicken has nutrients to help your stomach heal. The second thing is that you should not go where the junk is. If it is in your house because you live with unsympatheic people, the you will just have to walk away. I tell myself ALL OF THE TIME things like "Walk away from the cookies" or "Walk away from the ice cream section" Just having positive head talk helps me to fight the sabatoge head talk. So....talking to myself is better than ignoring the fact that some pretty serious surgery has taken place.

Fill your refrigerator with fresh whole foods that did not come from a factory. Eat more yogurt. Batch cook one day a week to have healthy options available all week. Buy cheese that you can cut or eat in one ounce pieces. Boil a dozen eggs. Do whatever you have to do to make nutritious options available. If you take a lunch to work, pack enough for those cravings that hit every time you pass a McDonalds. Instead of pulling in for an Egg McMuffin, you will have some bacon or a boiled egg in your lunch bag, and you can grab that. If I want something sweet, I will have a sugar free lollipop. I bought them in five-pound bags from Candy.com. I also buy bars of dark chocolate and put them in the freezer. When I want something sweet, I crack a piece off and eat it with a fruit flavored Tic Tac. My other sweet treat surprisingly is cherry tomatoes.

You can reach down inside to the clever you that is hiding out, and plan your eating for a few days at a time. I think that planning can be your new best friend for success. If you plan for your Protein and your fluids first, then hopefully you will feel fuller so that you can control your volume of food better. Just as you hopefully would not give a toddler everything it wants to eat regardless of whether or not it would be harmful, you need to be your own parent and ensure your own health and vitality. Plan rewards for yourself at every five pounds your lose. Let it be a book or an item of jewelry or small gadget for the kitchen, or a piece of clothing in a smaller size or a plant for the garden....whatever. Just don't let it be food rewards. I do wish you good luck and good health.

[Recycled 2,182]

All the rhetoric about eating right, making the right choices.....etc etc etc. are spot on.........But talk is cheap........

If you eat too much, you're gonna bust your staples and die!.........What??? To much reality for you. Then why did you get the surgery. They told you the limitations and hazards before. That's is the very reason why I had the surgery. I always ate too much. I couldn't control it.

Now I always measure my food and don't eat any more than will fit (3 ounces) in my sleeve, or it will burst and I'll die.!!!!

I believe it and I follow that guideline. That's my new control. At least until I lose the weight and and learn and adapt to better and healthier eating habits.

I have listened to all the things people told me I was supposed to do before and it never worked. So I wanted a radical step that would force me to comply. I have had complications from surgeries in the past and I know how bad it can get, so I follow the guidelines to the letter to avoid any problems with my sleeve. And if I do things to cause those problems, I have no one to blame but myself. As was said above, maybe your recovery has been going smoothly and you think you can push the limits without any negative effects......??? With that attitude you could be gambling with your life. You need to get on board with your sleeve and buckle down to what's expected from you. Regret typically comes too late. Good Luck.