So just what is success?

[gowalking 10,790]

I'm reading alot about folks reaching goal, trying to reach goal, almost at goal, not successful, not as successful as they want to be, blah, blah, blah....

So...here's the question. What is it that means success to you? Is it reaching a goal weight? Is it some NSV that you've attained? Is it a change in your perception of self? Something to do with relationships perhaps? I'm curious what you all think.

I'll start it. I reached goal in terms of weight a couple of months ago. But my idea of success is not hitting goal weight. It's being this size more or less the rest of my life. I've lost alot of weight before, but as usual, put it back on and some extra just for the hell of it. My son says he doesn't recognize me and it bothers him. He knows the fat me...and I understand that. I was fat for a very long time. He doesn't remember when I was this size some 20 years ago. I want him to start to think of me this size so that he's comfortable with the smaller me. That means I have to stay this way. That's success in my eyes.

What about the others on this forum? What's your definition of success?

[Mikee57 699]

Success to me is getting to a decent weight (still haven't figured out what goal weight I want to have yet), but most of all my success would be weighing a lot less be able to get around so much better and actually not having to take so much medications and being happy what I look like in a mirror!!! I don't know if I will ever get there, but that is what I'm striving for as my success. Thanks gowalking you have been a big help to me over the months too...inspiration for sure!!!

[2muchfun 8,927]

I'm not at goal yet(35 lbs away) but even if I never get there, I feel like this is a success for me. I was at the point before surgery where I was so limited in my activities I just couldn't go on and it was depressing me. Clothes shopping had come to a complete halt and I was wearing sweats and t-shirts everywhere. Please, no pictures!!

Still working on that goal and as soon as this stinking bad weather passes, I'll be back on the bike trails working off this last blob of fat surrounding my body.

And GoWalking, you know I've been talking about knee surgeries for 2 years now. I really regret not pulling the trigger last fall. Bad knees have kept me from all forms of exercising except biking. I love my bike, but I miss the tennis court, golf course, racquetball court, walking around the wildlife preserve and hiking. Gonna pull the trigger for sure this fall. My big regret now.

[lisacaron 5,075]

Success for me happens every day. It's in the little things. I am still a long way from my ultimate "goal" weight but every day I wake up and I give myself a goal that I would like to attain today.

Sometimes most times its food related, I try to gear my day toward some type of change. Whether it is getting up and planning out Breakfast and lunch, and sticking to that even if we have lunch catered in or if someone asks me out to lunch for the day. I try to stay in the frame of the goal I have set for myself that day.

There are days when it comes to exercise that I set goals for myself and say I am going to do this today and I fall short. I feel badly about it but usually there are some other goals that I have met that day, and I know that I have overburdened myself with goals and the one that is always going to fail is the one I want to do the least!

That is still a challenge for me, since I use up so much of my energy in other area's I don't take the time to get that work out done for ME. I am going to work on that in the coming weeks. I have set my hubby to a goal of PT for his hip and along with him I am going to PT myself! Get my arse up and moving more and more each day right along with him.

Like you Liz my son has told me that he sees how much weight both Ken and I have lost over the last year, and it has not been as significant as yours maybe half that, but there are still notable changes in our appearance. Our boys are all happy about the changes they see in us, and some of our boys who are obese are learning valuable lessons from the changes we have made in our lives. So for me that is a success as well.

I understand why your son is "bothered" by your new physical appearance. He is used to his Mom being larger than life to him. Now she seems smaller and in his mind perhaps more fragile. What he needs to understand is that you are still a ROCK! Who you are has not changed, you are not more fraile if anything you have become stronger through so much over these last few years. You can help him to see that about you, once you accept who you are today and embrace all the stregnth it has taken for you to get there! You truly are a strong force to be reconed with!

Our kids have these perceptions of us as we do about ourselves and if we are happy and accepting of our changes as we go through life they will be as well.

That goes for all things not just weight loss. We need to be comfortable in our own skin no matter its size, tight abs, flabby bellies chicken wings..whatever.

I know you are all successful at everything you do and true inspirations to all of us!

[gowalking 10,790]

And GoWalking, you know I've been talking about knee surgeries for 2 years now. I really regret not pulling the trigger last fall. Bad knees have kept me from all forms of exercising except biking. I love my bike, but I miss the tennis court, golf course, racquetball court, walking around the wildlife preserve and hiking. Gonna pull the trigger for sure this fall. My big regret now.

Don't beat yourself up over this. I waited till I was nearly bedridden. It's a big decision and it's not an easy surgery or recovery so I understand your hesitancy. At least you can bike. All I could do was paddle around the pool. Now I can swim again and do the Water exercise class. I can ride the recumbent bike...and I can walk. Not great yet, but I am walking and that makes it all worth while.

[pink dahlia 2,513]

Great question !!! Although I still have 20 lbs to go ,( that I have been trying to get off for a year now ! ! ), I feel i have been very successful as im back to the old ME !!!!!!! Not a specific # on the scale, but ME as a person !!!!! Yes, I look much better on the outside, but I also feel much better on the inside. Happy and healthy from the inside out ! Yesterday, my size 10 healthy , getting stronger every day body ran a 1.5 mile trail without stopping (slow, but I ran it !!), that made me feel very good, something no food could ever do for me. " I was a slender kid and young adult who used to love to run, sooooo ooo, for me , yeah, Im "successful."!!!!!

[Mikee57 699]

TMF I had both of my knees replaced at the same time...bummer...allowed myself to gain more weight that caused a lot more issues...so you are in a really better place to get your's done. I know even 38 lbs being off of them has helped tremendously. Will be thinking of you when you get yours done in the fall, please let us know that you are having surgery!!! Thanks for all of your advice on here too...it helps me so much!!!

[SandyM 1,956]

To me, the goal isn't just once I've reached my destination, but the journey I'm making and watching how the NSVs stack up. I'm enjoying it as I go. Sounds dumb, but not sure I'll be any happier once I get there. Kinda like working a puzzle. Once you finish........then what?

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Great topic Gowalking! Through this journey the meaning of success is ever changing for me. At first it was ok I need to loss 50% of my excess weight within one year, then it was I need to get to onederland, then it was to hit my goal weight and now it's like you said it's the desire to sustain where I'm at right now for the rest of my life. It was all the little victories along the way that meant the most to me and motivated me to keep going. The NSVs of going down a size or two, going to the Dr. and having tests done and everything coming back perfect, it's in the smiles on my family's face when they see how happy I am to be able to do something I wasn't able to do one year ago, it's that feeling of self-worth at the end when all is said and done that I set out to do this for myself to become healthy and of course look and feel human and have done just that. It's about being the person I've always been on the inside but at times was hesitant because of my outward apperance. I would like to encourange others through my experiences along this journey to help someone else who is where I was, that is what ULTIMATE success looks like for me. I want to be able to give others hope regardless of their current situation that they can change their life.

[LeeB1946 261]

I had this discussion with a dietitian at my weight loss clinic. I know what success can be if I let it. Success is that I have set a goal to loose 103 pounds. Now that I am at 93 pounds gone I am plateauing and weight loss has all but stopped. Success is allowing myself to be at this weight without the mind game of calling myself a failure. I have not failed at all. In fact she told me that she just hates to see me speak at pre-surgery information nights, because I, as a band user, have lost a lot of weight in a short time. She hope the people attending don't think all bands work this fast for everybody. That, in itself, makes me feel like a success, but knowing I am down to a reasonable weight that I have not seen in 50 years really makes me feel successful. Now, I have to maintain that success by keeping up the work. You are a success.