Rant!

[susansilver 0]

One of the very few people who I have told just called me and said that she read an article in People magazine (the bastian of serious journalism) about addiction transference. She was telling me this like everyone who has gone through WLS will now become addicted to drugs or gambling!!!!!

I wanted to scream at her, but instead laughed and said, I never liked drugs, hardly drink and am too broke from paying for this surgery to either gamble or shop!!!

She wanted to know if the clinic teaches us about this "side effect"

:help: Why are people so ignorant?????

[Gaffer 1]

Just tell her it is not WLS, but rather stupid people like her that make you want to drink.

My wife watched the Oprah about WLS and addictions, and we were laughing that I was going to become an alcoholic sexoholic. Of course she said how is this any different than before the surgery. :omg:

I am reallly wondering if all this crap in the media about WLS is just a way for popular media to get one last chance to kick a fat person when they are down and trying to improve thier lives.

WLS saves lives and makes way more positive impacts in peoples live than the few who end up having problems. I honestly think that those people would have been addicted to something irregardless, and that the WLS surgery industry is having to suffer the negative stereotypes due to a handful of people who do not have the courage to challenge thier demons.

Andrew

[JLB 0]

Hence the reason I haven't told anyone yet. I think, for the most part, people are trying to be helpful. This friend obviously cares very much for you and wants/feels like she needs to do everything to help you and make sure you are fully informed. However, I agree with you, it's very frustrating. If people would only do a bit of reseacrh themselves first, then weigh all the information and have a reasonable conversation about pros and cons, it would be helpful.

I've read so many posts on this board about people being approached, attacked, insulted, and belittled by friends and family regarding their decision to have lapband surgery. I've also read many posts about people being supported by their loved ones. For me, if someone isn't being malicous (sp?) or hurtful in their intentions, I think I will take the opportunity to inform them. Like I said, I haven't told anyone yet but I will have to within the next two weeks. Thanks for this post, it reminded me to prepare for ignorance.

[Yoda 0]

"Prepare for ignorance" that is a good one, JLB! An absolute MUST!!!

Susan...hope you had a good comeback!!!

[susansilver 0]

Yoda - I didn't, I just laughed it off, because we have been friends for a very, very long time. AAARGH! I wish I had more :censored:.

JLB - I d agree that she was not being malicious, just ignorant but honestly that was just plain stupid. :faint:

[susieq321 31]

I love absolutes... I have friends who tell me all sorts of things out of concern rather than trying to change my mind.

I think there are some people who have serious issues with food and when they don't deal with their food issues that can be transferred to other areas of their lives. I know people who went nuts with booze, sex and ended up in divorces etc. But I actually do not know one person who changed their issue to gambling. Is it a realtiy absolutely but I think it is the exception rather than the rule.

I can say, that if you have been obese as a teen and an adult, learning to deal with the attention of the opposite sex can be hard and overwhelming and once in a while you might do something dumb.

There have been time I haven't been the smartest with drinking but am I a drunk no.. I have 100's of bottles of wine but I don't care if I open them unless I am with family or friends. If I never touch booze again I won't cry. It is a lapse in occasional judgement which can happen with anyone whether they had WLS or not.

Tell your friend to do some more research and remember you love her... and like you did laugh.

[CanMacDaddy 0]

People Magazine...People Magazine? Give me a break...next you will hear that Scientologist and short man (and ladies you know what I am talking about) Tom Cruise is telling you WL is not necessary and all you need to do is convert to his flock... well flock him.

Let your friend know that you value their opinion but People Magazine is not the Boston Medical Journal. ... but then again the transference reference may just be off a bit... when you have WL you actually partner with a drugee ... a-la Sharon Osbourne. You need good information but you also need your friends to be cautious, supportive and encouraging.

Gaffer ~ Oprah... another great resource eh? Next Dr. Phil will chime in ... in this world there are people that will debate, promote, philosophize, etc... all sides of an issue -- thats what makes it so diverse and enriching. PS a real plane hit the pentagon on 911 not a missle!

I do believe in addiction transference and its affect on us however I feel it affects individuals differently. Hell I have been a holic my whole life.... workaholic, sexaholic, beeraholic, foodaholic, sportsaholic, et

c.... but I do not feel a pull towards drugs or gambling as a result of my unhelathy weight or current WL. I even dated a Casino card dealer in university but didn't gamble.... I had to leave her cuz she had a Full House at home she didn't tell me about.

I got to go cuz the new National Enquier is out and I want to see what they say about sodium levels in your diet.

Best of luck

CanadianMacDaddy

[biggiesmalls 0]

they still make people magazine?

[susansilver 0]

Mac and Biggie - you guys are killing me! Had the best laugh this morning!!! Thanks,

Susan

[Gaffer 1]

Gaffer ~ Oprah... another great resource eh? Next Dr. Phil will chime in ... in this world there are people that will debate, promote, philosophize, etc... all sides of an issue -- thats what makes it so diverse and enriching.

Dont get me going on Oprah. I could rant about her for days. I cant even stand to look at her, she is so full of sh!t she makes me want to puke. I just love how she always knows more than everybody that she has on the show. One minute she is telling how ghetto she is and the next she is telling us how hard it is to lose weight with a professional hand slapper (food cop), trainer, cook, bunion massager, dog walker.

AGGGGHHHH.

Andrew

[lizrbit 0]

CanMacDaddy said just what i wanted to say...

i think theres a real issue with addiction with most of us, and that the LACK OF IT makes the other areas we are usually obsessed over make them seem more intense.

we are just intense people.

[susansilver 0]

I agree. I do see my obesity as having an addiction component. That being said - I don't think it is a given that I will transfer my addiction to something else. I also don't think People magazine should tbe where the population gets serious medical and mental health information!

[DrewsLou 3]

One of the very few people who I have told just called me and said that she read an article in People magazine (the bastian of serious journalism) about addiction transference. She was telling me this like everyone who has gone through WLS will now become addicted to drugs or gambling!!!!!

I wanted to scream at her, but instead laughed and said, I never liked drugs, hardly drink and am too broke from paying for this surgery to either gamble or shop!!!

She wanted to know if the clinic teaches us about this "side effect"

:help: Why are people so ignorant?????

I guess I'm in the miniority here but from reading your post your friend doesn't sound "ignorant" she sounds concerned for you. I think addiction transference is a very real thing and I read the article in People myself. I didn't find it to make sweeping generalizations about all WLS patients suddenly having a new addiction.

Maybe there was more to your conversation than you posted, by from where I sit (and read) it sounds like she was concerned for her friend.

Just my opinion.

[susansilver 0]

Thank you. I won't say unequivocably that she was not concerned - but there is history there that of course you would not know about. Thank you for weighing in (no pun intended) on the subject!

susan

[amom 0]

Susansilver, pats to you for just laughing it off. True friends are hard to find, is one comment worth the potential loss of a friend. It does get frustrating though. best of luck