Give your opinion to tell or not

[ajustice 484]

I started to tell a few people and family. I had some negative reactions by what I thought was a close person friend and also a few others so I just decided to keep to myself. Overall it's my decision and no one has no right no judge my choice that I make in my life. I don't truly keep it a secret km just very selective about what I say and to whom I say it.

[nursejenny07 401]

I've told my family, best friend, and coworkers. 99% of them are extremely supportive. I don't plan on telling anyone else, unless the situation arises. As excited as I am about my surgery, there are still those out there who think it's the easy way out, or that surgery is a cop-out, so I'm not planning on posting to Facebook or anything. I'm too excited and happy about how my life is about to change, and I don't need any Debbie downers trying to talk down to me about it!

[LisaCO 169]

I am not ready to tell anyone except my husband & kids. My 3rd preop appt with my Doc nurse practioner said she wanted me to sit down with another coworker who had gastris bypass a year ago 1 month before surgery so she could tell me the good the bad and the ugly. I felt offended. I told her its not going to happen I am not ready to talk about it to other people. Am I wrong?

[MrsGloMartin 198]

I am not ready to tell anyone except my husband & kids. My 3rd preop appt with my Doc nurse practioner said she wanted me to sit down with another coworker who had gastris bypass a year ago 1 month before surgery so she could tell me the good the bad and the ugly. I felt offended. I told her its not going to happen I am not ready to talk about it to other people. Am I wrong?

No you're not wrong!! This is your journey and if you don't feel comfortable sharing or hearing about someone else's ups and downs that's your decision and it should be respected!! That's what I love about this forum we share and support each other without judgment.

[LisaCO 169]

Yes she even told me this forum was not going to help me & that I should join a local support group. I find this forum very informational. I am still new but learning. I really felt uncomfortable. I feel the users on this forum understand because they have either gone through or going through it. I like that I can move at my own pace. Didnt seem right.

[volkitteh 34]

It's a personal decision. There is no wrong or right. In the beginning I didn't want to share maybe because I was ashamed. But then I realized if someone was my friend they'll support me and if they criticize me then I don't need them around. If you don't want to talk to that person it's your decision but at least you know someone who has gone through what your about to and you can talk to them when YOU want to. Good luck with your journey!

[LisaCO 169]

Letting my feelings get the best of me. I need to stop & quit worrying about the people in this small town. I will talk when Im ready. For now im following the forum. Thank you all for the advice.

[Seagull00 19]

I told my husband, children (they're 9,8 &2) mother in law, best friends and my dad and step mom, sister in law, sister and neighbor. Other than that I'm keeping quiet about it, My husband and I decided that because of other issues on my side of the family that it was best if my mother and her side don't know, so we're keeping the circle tight and controlling the information tightly.

[MaryJane11 10]

I was telling people because I need support. Now that I have found this group that will be less. I have been so excited that I did tell the team at school that I work with and talked to another teacher who had it done. I also told people at my church so that they can pray for me. I did tell my mom and she is actually coming to take care of me for a week so thats great since we are not very close. She then told my brother and all my nieces and nephews and grandma and aunts and uncles. Didnt like all of that. I think she told them bc she is going to be out of town. Oh and my dad told at least someone bc he told me about someone who had it done. Not too happy with that part but the people that I have told have only been supportive, at least to me to my face. I have no one else to tell thats close to me and I will post pics of my weight loss but not shout it from the rooftops if that makes sense. I am glad people are supporting me and that helps even though it wouldnt change my decision. My principal even told me good luck as well!

[Ginger Snaps 1,323]

I've had mostly good comments back when I've told people about the surgery. I told my trainer at the gym and she said "Oh no... do it with diet and exercise." But then, when I told her I was having the surgery she has been supportive and said she is excited to see my results and that she will work hard with me.

My best friend knows -- she also said she'd like to see me try less invasive methods -- she has a lot of opinions about natural, alternative medicines -- but then she also knows I'm doing this for my health and has told me she will support me in any way she can. She's going to drive me to the hospital and even asked me what I will be able to eat early on so she can have that for me when we have Bible study at her house. That's a real friend.

Today I had a treadmill stress test as the last surgery clearance thing and the nurse administering the test talked to me about the surgery. He was in his 20's and told me he lost over 100 pounds after he moved out of his mother's house and got married. He said he never exercised but that he was nursing in a hospital and walked over 5 miles every day. He said he knows it CAN be done without surgery but didn't try to discourage me or anything. I told him it was good he did that when he was so young but that it is so much harder when you're older and have a sedentary job. He wished me luck and said when I come back for my followup visit in another 2 months, he'll expect to see a much lighter me. He was very nice and supportive even though he had done it without surgery.

So -- I think I have to learn not to try to defend my decision when people just have different opinions. Unless they get all up in my face about it -- then we'll have to throw down! lol