Giving my concerns a voice!

[TatorTot 44]

Hi,

I live alone and I decided to have wls. I have backed out 3 times already because I felt like I was not ready. After numerous attempts and failures of losing on my own that I really want to do this now. Being the age I am! 57 I feel like I have been skating by with my health and can't last much longer. I know if I keep this up I will be dead in no time.

My biggest concern about this, is the fact that I live alone and I am afraid that I enjoy food too much. It is like I am living to eat and not eating to live. I know I will miss it terribly when I can't eat the way I do now. I guess it is my friend but at the same time it is my worst enemy. I realize that it makes me happy.

I do want to get this weight off once and for all before I get any older. I wish I had just went through this years ago!! I am getting therapy and seeing a dietician but I am still worried.

I just needed to give my thoughts a voice because I feel like I am alone in this, so I guess I am looking for others that feel the same.

Thank You!

[Susan Beckman 16]

your definately not alone. I am a country Italian lol and I loved to eat, but it was literally killing me. I have diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure and a couple other things. I thought I would have a hard time giving up my favorites but honestly I do not even feel like eating since surgery. I have to admit though, occassionally I get a hankoring for a big ole hamburger. I just grab a popcicle and keep moving on. It will be an adjustment but sooo worth it. I am a little over 3 weeks out and off all my insulin. I get moody alot but that is normal I think. I have regreted the surgery at times but again that I think is normal.

Don't b discouraged by your doubts. You need to just make your mind up and just move ahead and do not look back. If you do not think you can handle the aftermath please do not set yourself up for failure. I believe in keeping it real and I would never attempt to talk anyone into this surgery. It is alot of work and a lifetime committment. You have to know that you know that you know, this is what you want.

Good Luck.

[Rena's got this 274]

I also live alone except for 1/2 of a week when my kids live with me (joint custody). I am also 57 and had the sleeve on February 25th. I have had absolutely no problems with it, and have done relatively well with my weight loss to this point. I have to say however, that I do miss food. A lot. Especially when food commercials are shown or I get an exceptionally tasty looking email from Betty Crocker in my in-box.

I am now to the point where no foods are off limits to me if I can tolerate them, and I have found so far that there is nothing I can't tolerate. I do feel a restriction, so I don't overeat anymore. When I get full, I notice that I'll start hiccuping, but haven't had any nausea related to the surgery.

I did this for my health, mostly, and it is going well. So when I measure the annoyance of not being able to eat more than 1/2 a slice of pizza or a bite or two of a hamburger with getting slimmer and healthier, I'll take the annoyance anytime.

Now, before I start getting reply's saying what the heck am I doing eating pizza and hamburgers at only 7 weeks out, my answer is, I don't. Only once did I eat 1/2 slice of pizza, and I haven't yet tried that hamburger. I usually eat Protein first, then veggies, then fruit and then carbs. It is the thought of having the pizza, hamburgers, etc. that I miss. I'll admit to trying out a couple of fried shrimp and a couple of french fries, but found that my tastes have changed, and I haven't had them since.

So you need to seriously look at how much you enjoy larger food servings and compare it to your desire to be healthy and decide which one means the most to you. Decide if it is something you can do, and if you are willing to do it. It isn't the easy way out, that is the truth, but it doesn't mean you have to give up enjoying food totally either. Good luck to you which ever route you take!

[shoopaie 26]

I can understand back out once, it is normal. You said you backed out 3 times. I would encourage you to really write on paper ALL the reasons you want to do this, and all the positives that can come out of it, and review it everyday and add to it. The reason I say this is because if you've backed out several times, it sounds like you are going to need some concrete reasons, that you can put into words, and be an anchor to keep you from backing out a fourth time. I wish you the best of luck!!

[SashaWLS 412]

I understand how you feel, but honestly, you'll figure it out and it'll be fine.. Just take it one step at a time and try not to overthink it. The experience will be different than you think anyway, because you don't know yet what your body will tolerate or not. I can still binge on popcorn. But mostly what I eat feels natural. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to go crazy if I don't eat, and then I have two bites and I'm stuffed, and then happy. Don't worry so much, you'll find the level that makes you comfortable.

[ad1203 85]

I have to tell you that I was not 100% sure of having this surgery early on. I kept going back and forth. The main reason was because I thought I would miss my food too much. I am two weeks away from surgery. What actually sealed the deal for me was attending WLS support group meetings. You can speak with other people who have already had surgery and others who are contemplating surgery. I found it to be so very helpful in making my decision. I got to meet and speak with others who had the surgery and told me how their experiences have been. I look forward to going to these meetings now. I feel so Enlightened after I leave and so ready for this. I don't know if you will feel the same way, but it may just help you make a final decision. Good luck to you! There are always people here who will help you out too!

[Catherine707 253]

Giving up one's drug of choice (food) is a big scary step, and I once thought that I would never get my cravings under control.... Fast forward 11 months, and have lost over 100 pounds, and eat much smaller healthy portions than I ever could before having the surgery. Yes, there have been bad days and some bad emotions, but I came to realize that they were just moments in time, and that food really wasn't the friend and crutch that I thought it was before surgery.

Good luck, I know that if you move forward you will be pleased with the results in the long run.

[Bandista 7,466]

I am happy to report that I still love food, just in much smaller amounts and at appropriate intervals. I like it that I can have a small amount of something and really enjoy it now, because I'm not focused on more, more, more.

[dylanmiles23 2,198]

Hi, I live alone and I decided to have wls. I have backed out 3 times already because I felt like I was not ready. After numerous attempts and failures of losing on my own that I really want to do this now. Being the age I am! 57 I feel like I have been skating by with my health and can't last much longer. I know if I keep this up I will be dead in no time. My biggest concern about this, is the fact that I live alone and I am afraid that I enjoy food too much. It is like I am living to eat and not eating to live. I know I will miss it terribly when I can't eat the way I do now. I guess it is my friend but at the same time it is my worst enemy. I realize that it makes me happy. I do want to get this weight off once and for all before I get any older. I wish I had just went through this years ago!! I am getting therapy and seeing a dietician but I am still worried. I just needed to give my thoughts a voice because I feel like I am alone in this, so I guess I am looking for others that feel the same. Thank You!

I have had 3 different dietitians. The 2nd I liked the best. She said there are no no-nos. just eat smart. I try but am not perfect. My band does tell when to stop. Tonight I took a small bite of my husbands RingDing. It was awful and too sweet.

Even though I live with my husband I cook different meals most nights. He does not eat meats only fins and feathers. Last night I had ribs that I made. Tonight was meatballs. I make enough for many meals and use a food saver. Wonderful investment.

Good luck with your journey. Go to meetings. I go every month for 2 1/2 years now even though July is my 2nd bandersary.

[GoalInProgress 10]

I empathize with you. I too live alone at 55. food is my friend & I know life will be so much lonelier without my friend.

[Wendydarling19 310]

Hi, I live alone and I decided to have wls. I have backed out 3 times already because I felt like I was not ready. After numerous attempts and failures of losing on my own that I really want to do this now. Being the age I am! 57 I feel like I have been skating by with my health and can't last much longer. I know if I keep this up I will be dead in no time. My biggest concern about this, is the fact that I live alone and I am afraid that I enjoy food too much. It is like I am living to eat and not eating to live. I know I will miss it terribly when I can't eat the way I do now. I guess it is my friend but at the same time it is my worst enemy. I realize that it makes me happy. I do want to get this weight off once and for all before I get any older. I wish I had just went through this years ago!! I am getting therapy and seeing a dietician but I am still worried. I just needed to give my thoughts a voice because I feel like I am alone in this, so I guess I am looking for others that feel the same. Thank You!

I don't live alone and I am quite young however I do know what you are going through! Most of us do! Most of us before WLS know what it's like to live to eat. When I was younger I lived in a poorer household. My mom was a single mother supporting my sister and I plus her sister and her sister's boyfriend and daughter. So that's 5 people, food was scarce. I would get $20 lunch money for the week for school and spend the extra on junk food for myself because it made me feel good. When I was 14 I moved in with my dad and his Italian wife who lived to cook and eat and whose motto was "food is love" I actually lost weight at one point from homemade food. I ballooned again when I moved out on my own and realized that with my money I could buy and eat whatever I wanted! Me and my bf work overnights which slows the metabolism to begin with not to mention being too tired to cook, we would go out almos every day to eat at a restaurant. I gained about 80-100 lbs this way. Then I got pregnant an lost the baby which caused me to stimulate my brain with food for relaxation. Now I have the band. Even with the band I find myself falling back sometimes and eating too many carbs (they go right through so be careful!) now I'm back on track as of a few days ago and losing again and it feels great. The band is a tool so you have to be willing to work it. If you have doubts that you will be able to work it or not, you may want to consider the sleeve.

[relief57 53]

I liked what you said about your relationship with food but as with any relationship we have to learn to establish boundaries. Obviously, the boundaries I had established with food were blurred. I wasn't sure about the surgery either. Took me four years to get on board. I had my first consultation four years ago, since then I lost and gained back and additional 30 lbs. It's like going back to and old boyfriend/girlfriend, they may have made you miserable at but they were comfortable (in that you knew what to expect) and available.

I've been banded for a week. Haven't had food yet and a little nervous about the process of finding out what I can and cannot eat. One thing I would recommend is that you find a good surgeon and find out what type of support they offer post surgery. My has been awesome. He checks in with me daily. If I need anything or have any questions I can contact him or one of his team.

Good luck with your decision.