Questions of 'readiness'- would love to hear about your case.

[sweetie716 270]

I have started the process of getting a sleeve. I have 6 months of physician monitored weight loss, and since I'm a teacher, I'll probably wait until Christmas break to get this done- so I have a bit of time to go.

I have a lot of questions, but they are questions my doctor at least treated quite superficially. (I'm going to meet other surgeons because of what seemed to be a very short-term mindset).

Here are my big important questions. I'd love to hear what others who are further along in their journey and hopefully some people who are 2 or more years out from surgery.

Big Important Question 1: I feel like surgery is the most extreme and kind of like a last chance at taking care of my weight problem. There really isn't anything else to try if I can't make a weight loss stick with surgery. I've lost weight before (sometimes a lot of weight) but it ALWAYS comes back with extra. I'm 28 and maintaining for life is a serious commitment- I've been lucky in the past if I can maintain a weight loss for more than 6 months. Can the sleeve help me when it comes to maintenance? For those of you who have had long-term success with any weight loss surgery, what was it that worked to help you stay healthy long-term?

Big Important Question 2: I don't only eat when I'm hungry. I eat sometimes out of habit (when watching tv or because its 'dinner time'). I also eat when I get stressed out or emotional (especially when I'm disappointed or frustrated). With those kinds of triggers for eating, will having surgery still be able to help me? Is that something that I have to stop completely before I would be likely to have a good long-term outcome? Does the process leading up to surgery or the surgery itself help you to really change so that you will still have the weight off 2 or 5 or 10 years down the road?

Please share what you felt like going into surgery and what you've learned along the way.

Thank you!

[PdxMan 4,292]

So, I am coming up on 3 years post op, so I'll throw my 2 cents in here.

Big Important Question 1: I agree. VSG is an extreme measure. Having 85% of your stomach PERMANENTLY removed is something that should not be taken lightly. I, too, have been successful at many diets often losing more than 40 pounds, but then gaining it all back plus 10 more. The diets were successful, but I was not successful at maintaining the lifestyle. I needed something which could help me change my relationship with food which brings us to ...

Big Important Question 2: I also had/have a poor relationship with food. I used and abused food. It was my comfort and companion. I used it for celebration and sorrow. Bored? Let's just grab a few crackers and Peanut Butter. OK, just a few more. This was one of the more difficult areas for me to face. I mourned the loss of comfort food used to give me. I was left with my feelings and had to deal with them in a manner which I was not used to. Perhaps I could have chosen to just ignore or bury them, but I knew this would be coming and I wanted to get at some of the root causes for my morbid obesity. The sleeve has changed my fundamental relationship with food. It has been tough, but it was something I needed to do.

As far as the process leading up to the surgery having effects years down the road ... it is all a building process. Everything is based on the work you do along the way. It is like building a house. It is only going to be as strong as the foundation and that is built early. Myself ... I tried to stick as close to the guidelines as possible. There will be many on here who will tell you that it is OK to cheat ... don't worry about it ... I'm sure that works for some people, but not for me. When I made the decision to have this life altering procedure, I also made a commitment to give myself the best chance at success.

As far as what I have learned along the way ... that would be too long of a post for here.

[my2bys9799 26]

Sweetie716, you are posing some very good, and very important questions. I have not yet had my surgery, but am scheduled for 5/23, and although am much closer along in the process than you, can absolutely relate to your concerns. I can especially relate to your question #2.

I have been overweight my entire life, and I will turn 43 this year. I have NEVER been successful at a single diet (and trust me, if it's out there, I've probably tried it) I even have a lap band, and didn't succeed with that. For me, I don't consider losing 40 pounds to be a success when I need to lose more like 100, and one of my biggest problems is that I am addicted to food. As PdxMan said above, I use food for everything! Celebration and sorrow. I grew up where we "celebrated" both Easter and Passover; Christmas and Hanukkah - but that meant eating! Oh, it's Easter, what are we making for dinner? It's Passover, let's make the Matzoh ball soup! Even romantic evenings with my Husband - let's get wine and cheese.

I have to learn how to deal with that and find a new hobby. Maybe a new vice. Hopefully, it can be something healthy. Maybe I'll learn to love working out (but seriously not about to bet any money on that). Either way, I know I need help, and I cannot and have not done it alone. WLS is my "most extreme last chance". Good luck - we're all here with you!!

[Terribj 208]

I think one of the best things you can do is prepare yourself as much as possible NOW--before surgery.

Stop drinking soda and understand that for best results you won't ever have it again.

Stop drinking alcohol - you shouldn't have it for 6 months after surgery and even then the amount is very limited

Stop drinking during meals. This explains why http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=xR0VM3mnsgM (this was the hardest for me)

Start exercising - even if it is walking down the street...create new habits. It worked for me to do all these things before.

I would also recommend not having food funerals - the more you put on now the more you have to take off. i admit - i did indulge in one item pre-surgery but I didn't go crazy (one sleeve of little chocolate donuts and yes it was heaven)

If you plan right you may still be able to have some to the foods you love now--it is all a work in progress and how you want to live. This is all for you - no one else. Figure out what works for you.

I have been overweight since I was 11. I tried every diet and nothing worked - I didn't lose the weight. I would do a good job of maintaining the weight while I was dieting but never lost.

My sleeve has now helped me lose 27 pounds in 3 weeks. I have no hunger, no cravings, no appetite. My hips thank me, my knees thank me. I am learning to eat all over again-- What my stomach can handle what it can't and how it feels to be truly be full. (after 3-4 bites).

I will continue to learn along the way on what works - I can't wait to start really exercising again and seeing where this takes me months / years down the road

GOOD LUCK!!!

[hrhlaurie 185]

I'll throw in my 2 cents...

When I started looking into surgery and began my required 6 months of dr visits, I basically thought I was just jumping through insurance hoops so I changed nothing about myself at first. I thought they would lop off part of my stomach and I'd just eat much less, not be hungry, and lose weight, the end. I didnt change my eating habits and gained 8 pound from first doctor supervised visit to the 5th one due to my extended farewells to nachos, big bowls of Pasta, and other high-calorie carb dishes. Then I got serious, understood what my horrible eating habits were doing to my body and how I needed to permanently change before and after surgery and lost 10 pounds by my 6th visit.

I attended a surgery class and starting seriously reading posts on this site and began to understand that my habits had to change. I met with the dietician and she helped me understand why I had to give up caffeine, due to the tannins that could irritate the new stomach and it causes dehydration which will be my enemy, even without caffeine. I now know that I have always eaten too fast, probably didn't even chew half of my food, or taste it because I'm always reading or doing something while I eat. Rather than focus on food, I have always just eaten what I liked and crammed it in without thought. This surgery is not only about eating less, it is about being healthy. if i gulp my food after surgery it will come back up and it will hurt. We have to take our Vitamins, drink Water and stay focused on Protein. This surgery can be life-changing, just apply what you learn from your doctor, Nut and this site and you'll do great.

[sweetie716 270]

Thank you all for sharing Lots went on this week, so I'm sorry haven't responded til now. I was reading as you all posted.

@PdxMan- Congratulations on your 3 year anniversary!

Do you still feel like you have to think about it (the steps you've taken to loose the weight) all the time or do the new habits become a new normal? Whenever I get with the 'fitness program' it feels like a very deliberate effort and it kind of takes over my thinking. Does it still feel like a struggle to make the better choices with food and exercise? I don't think I could be in that struggle mode with the lifestyle indefinitely (aka for the rest of my life), so it would be a help to know if it eventually becomes kind of automatic. Does the sleeve help with that somehow?

@my2bys9799- I hope everything went great with your surgery! I'd love to hear how it went.

@Terribj- Thanks for all the suggestions! The youtube video was awesome! I hadn't heard about that before, but it makes sense. I've been steadily been starting to be more and more conscious about how much/little I chew and trying not to drink with my meals. How long after a meal would you wait before drinking again? I quit sodas a while back-which was tough, so I'm glad I had one check off the list before beginning this process

I'm hoping that I won't feel hungry after surgery too. It would make it a lot easier to sort out the emotional "hunger" from the real thing and maybe help to clear up what those triggers are and find better ways to deal with them.

@hrhlaurie- when I went in, I'd already talked to my insurance company and they never mentioned that I had to do a supervised diet or anything and I had asked them about weight history. I had it all planned out that I was going to get this done over my summer break (i'm a teacher) and I'd get all healthy over summer- get used to my sleeve and how to eat, etc. It was all planned out in my head. Then I went in and they said 6 months of supervised- UGH! That didn't work in with the plan at all. Now I'm actually happy about having the time. I'm going to hold off until Christmas break. It is a super extreme thing to do, so I'm glad I'll have some time to start practicing for my post-surgery lifestyle (and hopefully make it stick).

I've done some more reading about how to deal with emotions by ways other than eating- and been trying some of them out. Are there any that any of you would suggest?

Another question for anyone- my doctor was saying i'll feel great in 5 days and can go back to work, but I'm not so sure- I will have only been drinking liquids for 2 weeks preop and I'll still be on liquids for at least a week after surgery- how on earth will I have enough energy to teach? (I'm not a teach-from-your-seat kind of teacher, and it's far from a desk job anyway.) I'm nervous about that part of it. I'll have 2 weeks to recover over break, but it's still making me nervous.

[my2bys9799 26]

Sweetie716, I have not had my surgery yet. I am scheduled for May 23rd, and will absolutely be sure to log in and share my experiences!!

Edited April 24, 2014 by my2bys9799