I don't want to tell people

[gettin skinny 0]

I am having surgery 4/13/7. I haven't told anyone but my husband and adult kids. Is keeping this under wraps possible? I don't want to be under a microscope with people judging me or giving me advice on something they know nothing about. Or even worse telling me horror stories of someone they know that died or is sick from weight loss surgery. For me it is a personal thing. Is this OK?

[Teachlady 3]

The only people I told were our church organist (I'm the choir director), the couple that we cruise with and my family. Nobody else needs to know as far as I'm concerned. That makes it that much more fun when the weight loss starts showing and people ask what how I've done it.

Oh and of course the hundreds of people on this site know about it too!!:biggrin1:

[TexasP 0]

I had my band done 4-4-07 and I only told my wife and parents. I told my kids I was having a stomach surgery and just left it at that, they are 6 and 8 years old and they would not be able to keep quiet about it. But I have alot of friends that have been calling me since Wed. asking how I am doing, so someone must have let the cat out of the bag. But I was the same as you I do not want everyone watching me every time I eat and telling me horror stories they have heard. So good luck on keeping the secret. And also good luck on your surgery.

[gettin skinny 0]

Honestly, how does everyone feel about their decision? Do you have regrets?

[socalgal3 4]

I am a "closet bandster". Only one friend knows and they have been very supportive and respectful. It is your choice on what to tell people. I think it is possible to "pass" as the weight comes off slowly. I have alot of people noticing now and asking my secret. I tell them that I am watching what I eat and exercising, which is the truth! I log my food daily on SparkPeople, exercise 3-4 times a week, have cut out fast foods, etc. I have my emotional ups and downs about the band, but overall I am glad I did it. Good luck with your surgery! Less than a week!

[gettin skinny 0]

socialgal, what caused your slippage and did you know?

[copywronger 1]

Obviously, you should do whatever makes you the most comfortable.

I told much more than my family, however. My good friends at work, good personal friends, and bosses know I'm having the procedure. For me to get the whole thing approved by Cigna took 8 mos -- so my bosses needed to know why I kept running out for weigh-ins and random appointments.

The way I see it, it's way better to be honest about it. If you don't tell the truth, it suggests you're embarrassed about it. Or that it's something to be ashamed of. If anything, you should be really excited and proud that you're getting to have something like a lap-band in your life. Go you! Ya know?

Personally, I'd wear that band proudly. I know I will. :rockon:

[christellini 0]

I totally understand and agree. I don't want people judging, and making comments. I don't have a date yet, but I'm only telling my closest friends and family. And while I totally feel this way a certain part of me is like I should tell people what a great tool the band can be. If it weren't for the few critical people that I don't want to know......

[gettin skinny 0]

I feel for me keeping quiet for now is the way to go. It isn't that I am ashamed, I just don't care to be under surveilance constantly or hearing people saying "oh my gosh, I can't believe you did that".

[Annabelle12 0]

I don't have a date yet either, but my mother knows, as does the rest of my family because I don't feel like I need to keep the fact from them (mind you I'm 22 and my family is a big part of my life). I've told one close friend, mostly because she is overweight as well, and I knew she would be one of a handful of people that would understand and provide support.

I'm not ashamed of it, but I don't really think it's something I'm going to freely throw out there when people ask how I'm losing weight. It's a tool, so diet and exercise are a big factor, so I think I'll just stick with that. Just my 2 cents.

[socalgal3 4]

I don't feel that I am ashamed of my band or embarrassed of it. I don't tell most people details of my life as I am a private person. It is your choice what to do, but don't be guilted into disclosing information that isn't anyone's business. My slip was caused from my band being too tight for too long, many PBs, etc. YES, I knew something was wrong as I had constant heartburn(which I had rarely had in my life), pain and couldn't keep anything down. All is great since the repair! I think they got it in a better place because it is so different from the first few months. Best of luck again!

[gettin skinny 0]

Things like slippage scare me for a couple reasons. My insurance doesn't cover any of it. I have to pay out of pocket for the whole thing. Complications could bankrupt me.

[PSWashburn 0]

:clap2:I held back telling anyone until I had my banding date. Now I have selected who I tell. My oldes son was sort of disappointed that I didn't tell him sooner. My youngest daughter just said, "Papa I am proud of you. I will miss your belly to rest my head on, but I am still proud of you." That makes it worth it so far and I have not done anything except I haven't done anything except get a date for my surgery and start my pre-op.

Phil

[Ollie 0]

I also kept my lapband private...too many people like to tell you horror stories they've heard and have since embellished. My husband and two adult sons are the only ones that know. For me, it was the right decision. If you want my two cents, you can always tell later on but you can't "untell"......good luck with your surgery and welcome to the future....

[edieparks 2]

I personally told everybody. I feel like it weeded out my true friends. I felt proud that I was doing something about my problem. My "problem" was very obvious to the world . Yes I was asked stupid questions but I tried to educate them.

Its a decision you have to make for yourself.

edie