How to deal with people, specially family

[hillgirly 228]

Only you know your marriage, but I think it would be best to tackle that discussion sooner rather than later. I'm thankful I've had my husband's support while I looked into this choice for years. I am scheduled for May 14th and he actually helps keep me on track when I have doubts & second guess my decision. I am doubly blessed that he continues to do that even though we are going through a rough patch- no matter how bad everything else is, he's been there for that. Your husband may surprise you once you share your feelings about this! I hope he does because his support will help you tremendously. Good Luck!

[Ree 215]

Please tell your husband ASAP. I know for me it was very hard to tell my husband, not because I was worried about what he was going to say but because it was me admitting to him that my weight has gotten so out of control that it required me to 'go under the knife' to cut out a large portion of my stomach in order to help me get my weight under control.

Honestly though I don't think I could have done this without his support. Actually I KNOW I couldn't have because I choose not to tell anyone else in my life. My husband was my support system, 100%.

[BackToHot 59]

Wow! Hard, harsh, "blunt" .... But true. It was a slap in my face that hurts but wakes me. I'd like to thank you guys for all your answers. Just knowing that someone took the time to read what a complete stranger has to say and to care enough to answer that means a lot. Thank you so much for caring, for the hard words and for the support. I should have done before but it is what it is, there's no way to go back on time. I will talk to him tomorrow when we wake up. I know he will support me. It's just that I'm so decided on going thru with the surgery that I'm avoiding anything or anybody that would try to convince me otherwise. Ill keep you guys posted with the outcome. Wish me luck !!! : )

[elfnow 277]

You will get through this!! I bet the surgery's gonna be easy after you've worried so much about just telling your husband... I personally find physical stuff is MUCH easier than emotional stuff!!

You can do this.

[jujubslim 95]

Wow! Hard, harsh, "blunt" .... But true. It was a slap in my face that hurts but wakes me. I'd like to thank you guys for all your answers. Just knowing that someone took the time to read what a complete stranger has to say and to care enough to answer that means a lot. Thank you so much for caring, for the hard words and for the support. I should have done before but it is what it is, there's no way to go back on time. I will talk to him tomorrow when we wake up. I know he will support me. It's just that I'm so decided on going thru with the surgery that I'm avoiding anything or anybody that would try to convince me otherwise. Ill keep you guys posted with the outcome. Wish me luck !!! : )

I wish you luck, it was very difficult to tell my husband too. He's a worrier and I knew he wouldn't be supportive. I did tell him after my info session with my surgeon, just as I suspected he was very concerned and wasn't too happy about it. After about a month we had a real long conversation about the procedure and he realized how much research and thought I'd put into it, he realized it wasn't just about vanity it was about being healthy. After our heart to heart he's been my biggest supporter, he even started eating healthier and losing weight together. I hope you and your husband can go through this together, you're going to need all the support you can get.

[vincereautmori 323]

I didn't tell my husband yet and I'm practicing on how to tell him. I can see he telling me that I don't need it and that I should just exercise daily and stop eating. Of course I would answer that I did that already and it didn't work. He would say I didn't tried hard enough. It's consuming me. Besides the idea of me going to Mexico is going to be the cherry on the top of the ice cream. Anyways I paid the down payment to Ready4Achange and I have the sleeve date for the 8th of may with dr Fernando Garcia. I booked n paid for the flight already. Ultimately ill tell him anyways but I know he's gonna take the news as a irresponsible thing I'm doing because we could use the money in so many diff ways, with our family and that Im risking my life when i have two little boys to raise, that would be a selfish thing to do etc. I don't have money to spare but I worked extra hard to put together that money so I shouldn't feel guilt about how I'm going to spend it. But he works very hard too and all money he makes is to give our family a better life. He never spends anything with himself. This is a cry for help

How would he feel about your decision if instead of obesity you learned you had cancer? You are doing this to live, to continue to be there for him and your kids, it's not cosmetic nor vain. Best of luck, and to a long and fruitful life.

[onlybroomegirl 250]

I truly believe you need to be honest with your husband. You are going to need his support. This is a MAJOR life decision. Best of luck.

[BackToHot 59]

I'm very pleased with the conversation I had with my husband. He showed very supportive even though I had the surgery and airline scheduled and paid for ( 500.00 down payment for surgery). All the comments and negative things I was expecting to come from him it didn't happened. It was all in my mind and my mind only. I don't know why I thought he would tell me to "wake up 5am to exercise and stop eating like a crazy! Instead let's give a better and more necessary use to this money!! Besides Mexico is very dangerous and the hospitals are like organ traffic market" bla bla bla. Guess what???? He never even mentioned none of those comments. I feel happy but guilt of thinking of him like someone who would not support me. He also volunteered to go with me. I told him no that he needs to stay with the kids and that would interfere in his work. He asked me to take his mother with me so he would worry less. I think I m my worse enemy. You know what's funny???? After our conversation I told him what I thought he would say. He LOL literally when I mentioned the organs traffic market.

I would like to say thank you to all of you. I mean "ALL" of you.

[sophie'sChoice 269]

Whew! Now that it's all out in the open......Onward! I'm so glad it turned out so well. We really are our own best enemies.....the things that grow in our head.....crazy!

[webhopper 57]

Amazing! So glad this turned out well for you!