Disappointed in surgeon's office's reaction to VSG internet forums

[Scylla 106]

In talking to the nurse/bariatric specialist who works in my surgeon's practice, I told her I was reading all I could about the sleeve, various types of Protein, what to eat after surgery, different people's experiences, etc. and generally getting good information on this forum and another bariatric surgery forum.

She kind of rolled her eyes and was quite negative about it. She said that in her experience people spread all kinds of misinformation and ways to "get around the rules" on forums like this. She said she didn't think it was a good idea, because she and the surgeons in the practice have had patients come back to them and say things like "Why do I have to quit caffeine? So many people on X forum don't have to!" or "Why do I only get to eat 3 meals a day and no snacking after surgery? All these other folks get to have 3 meals and 2 snacks!", etc.

I told her that I am going to follow my surgeon's directives and my main purpose for reading the forums is for ideas on what to bring to the hospital, the best tasting Protein shakes, Vitamin recommendations, etc. and to find out about other people's personal experiences and support others.

Did anyone else get a reaction like that if you mentioned your forum surfing to your surgeon's office?

[Zoey716 98]

My surgeons office actually suggests joining a support group, whether its there at their office, or on one of these WLS website/forums. They think the more information you can get the better, and I couldn't agree more!! I think if you find these sites, helpful, informative, supportive and fun to converse with others going through the same thing as you - then stick with it. Best of luck to you!!

[Sherri297 81]

In my opinion Dr.'s and their staff, still have somewhat of "The god complex".

They like educated patients but only on what that specific practice deems is their protocol. Pre-op and post-op instructions vary greatly. I'm a middle of the road person myself, and believe in reading everything I can get my hands on. Sorry your Dr.'s office is un supportive.

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

nurse didn't think it was a good idea.

@@Scylla

I think i saw your nurse in the movie "One Flew Over the Cukoos Nest"!!!

i talked to my NUT and family dr and they both thought the boards are a great place to visit

this board is very helpful

listening to stories/tales about other sleevers experiences pre and post op situations IS great

certain questions regarding coffee/caffein/drinking from a straw/soda.........

people will answer questions by telling what THEIR nut told them and pass that info along

but its usually pointed out to newbies like you that you should always listen to your surgeon or NUT or nurse (even if THEY are alittle NUTS!!)

sometimes you need to go to your doc about medical issues that we're not that knowledgable about (again except me!!! )

we are here to give each other support/advice/info

we all LOVE to talk about our bowel movements/or lack of -head hunger, stallls, sex....many other good stuff!!!

you'll hear the great things that happens to "us" as we succeed through our voyage

NSV's like being able to fit into smaller clothes, crossing your legs, going on an amusement park ride

i can tell you are a smart "cookie" because you decided to change your life by having the sleeve

good luck with pending surgery

kathy

Edited April 8, 2014 by proudgrammy

[PdxMan 4,292]

Well, I see you joined the forum in August, 2013, so you surely have seen what your office has been saying. There are many, many toxic threads on here patting each other on the back laughing about how this person or that has been doing their own thing and haven't suffered any consequences. People will substitute this forum for their doctor's guidelines, yet still expect their doctor to support them. Does that make any sense?

Take this scenario into your own life. What if you were working in the garden department at your local nursery and someone comes in needing help with planting their vegetables. You give them all the plants they need and directions on how to prepare the soil, space the plants, fertilize and Water them. Then, they come back a month later telling you the tomatoes are laying flat on the ground. You ask them if they followed your directions and they tell you the went to a gardening forum and followed their advice.

What would you say next? Would you be frustrated? Is it fair to say that you have a gardening god complex?

While I agree, there are doctors who do have a god complex and they are not my doctors for long. I always ask questions of my doctors and the ones who have a dialog with me stay.

IMO, internet forums are a place to research and share our experiences. If you discover something here which is different from your understanding, you should ask your medical team first before implementing. As has been mentioned, they know your medical history and are vested in your success.

*** EDIT ***

I also wanted to add that as I am sure you have read, a lot of people will post threads on here seeking validation to do something which they know is against the guidelines. Again, a very dangerous, toxic thing as it undermines the fundamental philosophy of change. It reminds me of the thread from someone who wanted to know what they could order from Dairy Queen 3 weeks post op. Dangerous thread, IMO. "Oh, look, this person said I could have a Dilly bar," and well ... play the rest of the tape.

Edited April 8, 2014 by PdxMan

[BigGirlPanties 957]

I agree! I like this forum for support and basic understanding and commiserate or Celebrate

I call it the "FB of WLS"...

while we can get some good information and feel supported here, we do have to be aware of what our doctors tell us to do is what we should do (as stated above)... some doctors want 2 week pre/post op diet, some want a few days, and some not at all... right there is shows the inconsistancies that can happen....

"do as you're told. not as I (we) say"

[Tangy 61]

Well, I see you joined the forum in August, 2013, so you surely have seen what your office has been saying. There are many, many toxic threads on here patting each other on the back laughing about how this person or that has been doing their own thing and haven't suffered any consequences. People will substitute this forum for their doctor's guidelines, yet still expect their doctor to support them. Does that make any sense?

Take this scenario into your own life. What if you were working in the garden department at your local nursery and someone comes in needing help with planting their vegetables. You give them all the plants they need and directions on how to prepare the soil, space the plants, fertilize and Water them. Then, they come back a month later telling you the tomatoes are laying flat on the ground. You ask them if they followed your directions and they tell you the went to a gardening forum and followed their advice.

What would you say next? Would you be frustrated? Is it fair to say that you have a gardening god complex?

While I agree, there are doctors who do have a god complex and they are not my doctors for long. I always ask questions of my doctors and the ones who have a dialog with me stay.

IMO, internet forums are a place to research and share our experiences. If you discover something here which is different from your understanding, you should ask your medical team first before implementing. As has been mentioned, they know your medical history and are vested in your success.

*** EDIT ***

I also wanted to add that as I am sure you have read, a lot of people will post threads on here seeking validation to do something which they know is against the guidelines. Again, a very dangerous, toxic thing as it undermines the fundamental philosophy of change. It reminds me of the thread from someone who wanted to know what they could order from Dairy Queen 3 weeks post op. Dangerous thread, IMO. "Oh, look, this person said I could have a Dilly bar," and well ... play the rest of the tape.

Well said!

[bunnieru 1]

My Dr's office actually gave me these websites.....which i am so thankful for. I just started my six month diet this past Sunday and actually looking forward to see if I can lose weight this time....yeah I know you shouldn't give up but sometimes it can be frustrating! Reading these posts make me see things differently and in a good way. Has anyone else feel more hungrier when they are at work and not at home? That was a big problem for me!

[Scylla 106]

Thank you all for your comments! I love this forum (and its' members) and would not give it up no matter what she said! Plus, she knows I'm smart enough to do my own research and draw my own conclusions.

But as PdxMan said, there are quite a few threads (like the DQ one that we both saw ) where people seem hell-bent on doing their own thing, not following "the rules" and expecting validation. I'm sure it's that kind of patient that my bariatric nurse has had issues with.