PdxMan 4,292 Posted April 3, 2014 (edited) I know we are all very focused on our individual weight loss journeys. I know for me, it was a rollercoaster of highs and lows emotionally. Physically, the changes can seem daunting as we embark on exercise routines which find ourselves being screamed at by an over the top Zumba instructor. Some days, mentally, I am drained. I believe it is important to stay focused on ourselves early out. This is our time. We have committed to making a fundamental change with our relationship with food. At times it has been easy for me to slip into a funk. I become restless, irritable and discontent. Someone wiser than myself suggested to me that when I find myself suffering from R.I.D., it is time to make a gratitude list. I focus on the things that I am grateful for in my life right now. It doesn't have to be a task which occupies you, but I do recommend actually writing them down. They can be things as simple as being grateful for having a full tank of gas, or having a comfortable chair. Don't be surprised to have your thoughts hijacked by negativity while working on your list. Try to re-route your thinking to things you would be sad to not have in your life right now. Keep this list handy and review it before you go to bed adding things you see fit. This can be a tough journey emotionally and I have found this exercise keeps me focused on the things in my life that are important. If you are not sure how to do this, Google Gratitude List as there are many different methods for doing this. Religious folk may take a different tack than an agnostic. Men will also take different approaches than women, young versus old ... Type A personalities will believe they are on everybody else's gratitude list ... ;D ... giggle, snort Take care and don't forget to love yourself. Edited April 3, 2014 by PdxMan 19 RJ'S/beginning, kltklass, BKLYNgal87 and 16 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Indigo1991 1,612 Posted April 3, 2014 Great advice! It is so easy to get caught up in the moment, caught up in being R.I.D. and lose sight of the bigger picture. For me, I still have odd moments when I feel fat and look in the mirror being very self-critical. The reality is I am not. I am 85lbs lighter than last year with a BMI of 25. I am a UK size 10/12. To the world I look normal sized. I have to shake myself and it helps to think about what I am grateful for - no diabetes, no pain from arthritis and the other night it was simply sitting at the cinema and being able to sit with my arms INSIDE the chair. There wasn't a bit of me "leaking" into anyone else's space beside me. For me, being grateful usually gives me perspective on what I was R.I.D. about. Like the idea of writing it down because I think I would be surprised at just how much I have to be grateful for every day.... 5 RJ'S/beginning, Bandista, PdxMan and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LindafromFlorida 1,542 Posted April 3, 2014 Pdxman, I love your posts. Keep it up, as you are always on point with things we need to hear. 3 PdxMan, kltklass and ☠carolinagirl☠ reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HHHappy 225 Posted April 3, 2014 I remember seeing Dr. Weil on Dr Oz talking about Gratitude Journals. I make my list right before I go to bed so my thoughts are "positive", enabling a better sleep. 2 terrydumont46 and PdxMan reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gmanbat 5,889 Posted April 3, 2014 Good one, PdXman! A well lived present is better than regretting the past or worrying about the future. If the present is lived well enough the other two will be taken care of. Gratitude about what you have is a great part of it. 4 PdxMan, ☠carolinagirl☠, LindafromFlorida and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
terrydumont46 1,954 Posted April 3, 2014 I have kept a journel since before surgery. I went and did a quick perusal just to see if I remember to jot down my high's. and I have. but on a mental note when pity starts to seep in I just remember that my first goal of weight loss was curing my diabetes. just last week I am now off of insulin. it makes me smile to think about that. it's nice that the good stuff isn't fantasies but are becoming realities. 5 ☠carolinagirl☠, gmanbat, PdxMan and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PdxMan 4,292 Posted April 3, 2014 Journaling is always a great method to do a brain dump. But when doing a gratitude list, I try not to limit myself solely to my weight loss journey. As a matter of fact, I try to focus on everything outside my WLS for which I am grateful for. This helps to keep me out of my pity parties. 5 ☠carolinagirl☠, SillyAuntDi, pquinn181 and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pink dahlia 2,513 Posted April 4, 2014 Great post !! My gratitude list ...............The lapband , my insurance and my Surgeon for giving me my life back. My family and friends for being soooooo supportive. No more sleep apnea, digestive problems and a lower bmi. Feeling good from the inside out, every. single. day. Skinny jeans, cute, smaller sized clothes, more energy, painting my own toenails because I can , running shoes, feeling myself getting stronger all the time, happy to see people and nice compliments from them, grateful that im able to give back to others, and my " so glad my dream came true " the gift of being a runner. ( Slow, but getting better all the time) For that alone, I am truly grateful. 2 ☠carolinagirl☠ and terrydumont46 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Healthier2day1227 326 Posted April 4, 2014 I love this! I am a recovering alcoholic and this tool has helped me along in my sobriety. The act of making the list makes you realize simple things you didn't even realize you had to be grateful for. It always got me off the pity pot. I never thought of making one after surgery. Awesome tool! I would say today I am grateful for... No more foot pain Feet have gone down in size Being able to be active with my two year old and twelve year old Fitting on Disneyland rides with my kids Overall health Not obsessing about food all the time Saving money because it costs less to eat the way I do I could go on...these are just my surgery related gratitudes also grateful for so much more. 2 terrydumont46 and ☠carolinagirl☠ reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Katcloudshepherd 630 Posted April 4, 2014 FABULOUS IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have been stuck in the Restless Irritable and Discontent, (RID) state for some time. I will begin today in making a list of things to be grateful for to get me out of the RID state. I have much work to do to overcome the faulty programming I recieved growing up. Blessings, Kathleen 1 pquinn181 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Katcloudshepherd 630 Posted May 7, 2014 PdxMan, Just re-read your original post after I had initially responded to it. It's as if I didn't see that last line before. This time I started to tear up at: "Take care and don't forget to love yourself." I don't think I was ever taught to love myself. Probably the reason I ended up needing weight loss surgery to begin with. I needed to be reminded of the need to love myself today and frankly, everyday. Love the quip about Type A personalities . Thank you again for the post. Kathleen 2 PdxMan and ☠carolinagirl☠ reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PdxMan 4,292 Posted May 8, 2014 Yeah, I can get so involved with everything going around me. Trying to make everything run smoothly with the spouse, kids, work and other civic responsibilities I have, yet I forget that I need to have myself on that list. Not only do I need to be on that list, but I need to be a top priority. But when things start getting hectic, I am often the first to get de-prioritized. Then, everything else suffers. It happens unconsciously. But, I have been working on a little thing I call "pause". I stop. Take a deep breath and meditate, focusing on what the next right move is. If I find myself really spinning, I make a gratitude list. It always helps to right-size my thinking and settle my RID. And yes, the A-type personalities ... I'm on your gratitude list ... RIGHT!!?? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites