Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

I feel like i'm lying to people!



Recommended Posts

Thanks for the advice everyone! I know this adventure is just as much mental as it is physical. It just takes some getting use to ????

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was just banded two and a half weeks ago, but I've lost 32 pounds in the last two months preparing for surgery and post surgery. I'm on liquids still and have no restriction. Today a female coworker who's a real sweetheart offered me some gourmet truffles because I've always been the one who brought candy to work for the communal candy bowl. When I politely declined saying I'm staying away from candy for now, she asked if I've lost weight. I said yes, a little. When she asked if I minded saying how much I told her. "HOLY COW!" We both laughed. She started sharing her current struggle of gaining 40 pounds since Thanksgiving. She asked how I'm doing it. Here's what I said. ALL TRUE. I had a medical wakeup call and had to make a change. I'm working with my doctor and a nutritionist. I've raised my Protein and cut carbs. I walk every day on my treadmill and increase my time on it daily, and am building up to two miles, which I should hit on April 9th. My food plan will allow me more choices soon, but it's pretty strict right now. Even though it's only a smallish loss, I already went off of one blood pressure medicine and got off NSAIDs. My goal is to get rid of my cholesterol med next. We talked about arthritis, etc., which we both have. I didn't feel one bit guilty not talking about the band. My band, bless its little silicone heart, isn't even doing anything yet. Diet and exercise and lots of hunger have done this so far. When I finally get to solid foods, then the restriction of the band will start to HELP me diet. I still need to follow these behavioral changes for life. For life. For life. The band won't do the work for me. It will make it easier for me to do the work. LapBand ain't for sissies! And it ain't. Nobody's. Business. But. Mine.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Great way to handle it :)...you seem to have already been extremely successful with your new lifestyle change and I wish you the best of luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It took me two days to write out what I wanted to say, but once I was satisfied, I copied it, pasted it into Facebook, and hit Post. I said "Screw it, I'm doing this for me." I know that seems harsh, but I'm the one making this journey, and anyone who knows me knows the battle I've had. At the end of the post, I advised that if anyone had a problem with what I was doing, they were welcome to "unfriend" me. If they wanted to leave a nasty comment, I would happily delete their comment, and delete them from my friend list myself. I know...ooooohhhh, so mean! :D

I'm not a Facebook junkie, that's my wife's department. But, I knew there would be questions, and I figured I would be more annoyed by repeatedly answering their questions than I would be by them knowing the truth. You didn't do this so people would like you, at least you shouldn't have. You did this for YOU. So, revel in your victory. If they don't like it, well...let them eat cake! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Its none of their business…and u don't have to validate you're weight loss to anyone….

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been pretty open to people around me about my surgery. My family, my close group of friends and my co workers. But I'm having a problem with other friends and people that I'm not close to asking "how I did it". I feel like I'm lying to them when I say, I count my calories and workout. It's not a lie because that's what I do but I leave out the part of having the band. How do you guys deal with it?

you are merely changing what you eat (to also eat less) and exercising and getting well/healthy....no lying....only truth

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Unfortunately people in today's society are nosy, opinionated, gossipy and uneducated! Not all…of course. But it always seems that those are the ones who want to know the "magic secret" to your success!! And like many others have said, they know what they need to do (eat better, exercise etc.) but I believe they secretly hope that we have the answer to what ails them!

No magic wand here! ITS HARD WORK! …and many times I don't think people realize that- which is why I have limited my revealing my surgery to those I trust. Some think that WLS will cure all….you go for heart surgery…they fix it and you are better….you have gallbladder surgery…they remove it and you feel better…

...well in this case, YES, I had WLS but that does not JUST fix it..the weight will NOT be gone tomorrow….it will NOT remove my head hunger…it will NOT get rid of my cravings…it will NOT make good food choices for me. It helps SO much but there is so much work involved….they don't get it…at least many don't!

I will help those I feel are genuinely interested …. Im not trying to save the world….just myself right now!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

this is really hard for me because at work I have two coworkers that had the gastric bypassand lap band surgery and they get judged alot by my coworkers and I didn't want to tell anybody that I was getting the lap band surgery because they don't understand the struggles and the lifestyle changes that I have to make an order for me to lose weight it's hard because people don't get it it might be easy for some people lose weight and it's harder for other

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Same here. It's the truth about cutting calories, eating smaller portions. So it's not like they asked "Did you have weight loss surgery?" because if you say no, that's a lie. Lol It's none of their business anyway. Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A year in... And I haven't told a single person outside of my boyfriend and best friend. And that's what I wanted. Im not lying when I say that I lost weight with less calories and more exercise. You aren't obligated to tell anyone you don't want. It's your body... Your health... And your life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am continualy amazed at how many people think they have the right to run their mouths concerning someone else's choices. I literally have not had a single negitive comment in the 2.4 years since surgery. Not one ! Had I gotten a rude or negitive comment, my response would of been something like "Well, you may think you know what you're talking about, but until you've sat down with my Dr. and done your homework you dont, so please keep your opinions to yourself ! " Not rude, but def making it clear that I was standing my ground! Im very grateful that I always had positive comments , or none at all. When the weight starts coming off of you, just be prepared for nice compliments ! Good luck !

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am always open and honest regarding my band when asked. The reactions have all been positive and actually 2 friends are now considering it as well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone for your responses...I'm going to try to have a better outlook regarding the band. I think because of the negativity I had received beforehand made me have a different outlook on how I felt about it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Do not feel like your lying. The Band is a tool, just as a food scale or a scale, or a measuring cup. If you weren't able to use the tool, you wouldn't able to accomplish the task. Currently, your task is to loose weight.

Please remember, even with the band you're able to gain weight.

There is no reason to tell the world what tools you need. As long as you're able to reach your goal, and you feel better. And you happened to look fabulous too!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Me personally, if someone asked, I'll tell them I had lapband surgery. If they have a problem with that, it's their problem. I just know how much better I feel and can and want to do so much more now:) 60 lbs gone in 6 months and 49 to go. Feeling blessed!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×