Surgery scheduled but family unsupportive need help

[Heatherbordelon01311991 3]

Hello everyone! I have struggled with weight my entire life........well a girl I know got the sleeve about a month ago and she has seen so much progress......soooo I went visit a surgeon in my area.....I LOVE HIM!!!!!.......he feels that the sleeve is a good fit for me.......but I mentioned it to my family and they are so against it.......they fill my head with horror stories......like u will experience malnutrition, it will make you so sick, it ages you, your hair falls out, you throw up everyday, your bones get brittle and will break, and you will die! It scares me so much and I hate that they don't support me........my family is my everything .......I really need help! Should I get the surgery? Are all of these things true that my family is telling me about? I'm 23 healthy besides my weight but I am so sick and tired of being obesed .......please help

[happygirlforlife 34]

I am a month until surgery but all that isnt true. Encourage your family to read some of these threads... Watch some you tube videos ... Maybe even read some of the great sharing on here. Good luck!

[Merry1 45]

Hello everyone! I have struggled with weight my entire life........well a girl I know got the sleeve about a month ago and she has seen so much progress......soooo I went visit a surgeon in my area.....I LOVE HIM!!!!!.......he feels that the sleeve is a good fit for me.......but I mentioned it to my family and they are so against it.......they fill my head with horror stories......like u will experience malnutrition, it will make you so sick, it ages you, your hair falls out, you throw up everyday, your bones get brittle and will break, and you will die! It scares me so much and I hate that they don't support me........my family is my everything .......I really need help! Should I get the surgery? Are all of these things true that my family is telling me about? I'm 23 healthy besides my weight but I am so sick and tired of being obesed .......please help

. Get your family to meet the girl who has had it done and I am sure there are information seminars like we have in Australia take them to one of those so as they can make an informed decision. Yes there might be some Hair loss but as for the rest of it, most people are not throwing up every day only when the eat the wrong foods or to much food. You don't get malnutrition with the sleeve that is usually the bypass and I have never heard oh brittle bones. I am 55 and about 6 months out I have lost 74lbs and my only regret is that I didn't get this done 20 years ago, it has improved my health and lifestyle enormously. Good luck

[Heatherbordelon01311991 3]

I have researched a lot and watched a ton of YouTube videos .......I haven't really heard that many negative things about the sleeve .......I was so excited about starting my journey but like I said, my family

Is terrifying me ...........I will try to get them to come sit in a class or seminar with me but I doubt they will be up to it ........I will try to get my support through this but I feel do alone ........I really want it ........does anyone regret it?

[swimbikerun 1,045]

Ok as someone who has been there: sleeved 12/15/11, hospitalized "you are going to die" from malnutrition 6/20/12, and have complications from it, I am pretty much unique.

I had gastroparesis before the surgery. The surgery should have gotten rid of it. Gastroparesis is slow stomach emptying. Well a scan showed mine is still mildly delayed. I now have reflux, and a case of IBS, and who knows what else. I have food intolerances by the boatload.

Would I get it again? Absolutely!!!! Even with things like they are now, I've done things in my life I imagined and some I never have. So from someone who has been there, yes, it is worth it.

It is extremely, extremely rare for people to have my problems. I had a pre existing GI issue AND known allergies. Factor that in. You have a much larger chance of having problems getting the weight off and keeping it off than you do of mine.

Again, I've not said everything here but OMB YES I would get it again.

I just wouldn't have the surgeon I had. Then again, I asked for a different one and didn't get them, so that's part of the issue.

[mandaree85 3]

Heather...your families stories are coming from the lack of knowledge. I am a week post op and I'm doing great. I have NEVER thrown up and I'm starting to get my full amounts of energy back. Yes it is possible for some Hair loss but your not going to go bald I promise. Every surgeon is different and the diets they have you follow are different. My family (particularly my husband) was not happy when I made the decision to have the sleeve done. However I had him come to the informational seminar that my surgeon requires, And my surgeons appointments, I even started having him do research with me which made him more relaxed. Then when we went to the preop appointment to meet withy surgeon for the last time he just started asking question after question which made him feel better. Help inform your family and educate them and it may help them. I know it's hard to proceed with this life changing decision without support of your family- but ultimately it is something that you have to decide! Good luck and we are always here for support.

[Heatherbordelon01311991 3]

Thank y'all so much! All of you have given me great advise and actually put me at ease about my decision.........I really want it thank y'all so much for being there for me.....it means more then y'all know

[Fiddleman 4,376]

About the only thing that happens out of your horror list is some loss of hair. It is usually just for a few months and then it grows back. This is true for a majority of people given they follow the basics as instructed by their doctor after discharge. Now it is time for you to give your family a list of all the blessings and NSV after NSV that occur as a result of having the procedure done. I think they will have your attention and you will have their support after doing this.

Edited March 12, 2014 by Fiddleman

[LindafromFlorida 1,542]

My husband and I are 3 months post op sleeve after 10 years of research and seminars. 67 years old and happy and healthy! We can do anything now. Best of luck!

[andreamy7 55]

Your family is scared that something bad can happen to you. They care about you is all. They just have an odd way of telling you that. They don't understand fully what it can do for you. I am 5 months post op and have lost almost 50 lbs. I try to overeat, I get sick. I emotionally eat now and then I feel sick. Your body will not really let you eat what you eat now, you will mourn food, you will crave things you cannot eat. I do get some weird pain now and again, I think I am still healing but I don't throw up. Its more like what you just swallowed comes back up--we are not talking horrible vomiting. I am trying to eat lighter but you can still cheat with ice cream etc...you have the power to do it. Get someone from the family to go to the dr with you. They can ask questions and bring some material home for them to read. There are some.good books out there. Make sure you take your time to find a good DR and good luck!! Oh and I still have all my hair and my bones are great.

[Heatherbordelon01311991 3]

Thank y'all! I will def print this put for them to read when the time comes......it really means a lot!

[gia1961 4]

Hope this helps, I spent the last year throwing up because my stomach had stopped working every time I went to my doctor it was more and more meds. I made a choice and at first my primary doctor was all against it. But I told him get on board or there is a doctor who will I knew something else was wrong. I put myself in Gods and my surgeons hands the morning of January 15, 2014. And my doctor came out to my children and said my liver was I bad shape that a year to two from now he could have not done this. It has changed my life for the better. Remember this is your life and your health. You will be fine and the best thing is having the upmost faith in your surgeon. Take it one day at a time and come here often because your not alone here. And be assured that when your family sees all the positive things happening they will be there for you too

[Heatherbordelon01311991 3]

Thank you!!!! And yes, every little but helps......like I've said they try to scare me into not having it and of course no one wants to die or make a terrible health decision but I don't feel like this will be a bad decision......I honestly feel like it will be a great decision .......I am scared, but who wouldn't be?! But seeing all of these positive results really helps.....I read here everyday

[gia1961 4]

Your going to do great, I look forward to seeing you on the other side of surgery The Losing Side yay

[maxrobison 4]

I am a month until surgery but all that isnt true. Encourage your family to read some of these threads... Watch some you tube videos ... Maybe even read some of the great sharing on here. Good luck!

Well maybe you need to look at the other side of what will happen if you don't have the surgery. That is what did it for me, diabetic, high blood pressure, high chol, knee surgery, needing knee replacement, etc... With the surgery off meds for HB, diabetic, knees doing much better. I had to look at what was better for me, for my health, for my life. There is a difference between quality of life and quanity of life, with this surgery I have received the ability of both quality and quanity. We never know what the next day brings, but we do know that we hold in our hands the future of our life. The decision will always be yours don't be upset with your family, they are just scared, like you. All you can do is try to inform them, the decision is solely on you. I wish you the best of luck, please remember that family will always be family, you are the one living with you.