Self-control!?

[Malsr 49]

I've worked in an office for 5 years and am the senior person in the office. We just hired a new person and she's started bringing in candy that sits right outside of my office door. This is a temptation that I have avoided bringing in to the office for years. She too is quite overweight and we are in a "Biggest Loser" competition together at work. I asked her to to refrain from bringing certain types of candy (since I wasn't going to ask that she stop all together since it makes her happy) because they are trigger foods for me. I feel like she was receptive, but others in the office seem to have other opinions on the issue. The words "self-control" were thrown around.

Now, I currently have a failed Lap Band and will get the sleeve on April 9th, so I am having to really work hard to eat small portions and stay away from certain foods. It's just hurtful when someone diminishes my feelings and makes me feel like my issue is simply a lack of self-control. I have self-control because if I didn't I'd already have eaten myself into a grave. I fight everyday and lost nearly 100 pounds with my band at one point. It's just a challenge being surrounded by your drug of choice and I feel like it's unnecessary in my office. Am I the only one that feels this way? I guess I just want support from my co-workers. Mind you, they don't know I have ever had WLS since I don't want to deal with the judgment or having to explain why I chose WLS to help me get healthy. Anyway, I'm just venting. I'll be walking out of my office with my eyes closed all day. Getting in the sleeve mindset. Thanks for listening/reading.

[Kiap82 239]

Good luck!! You can do this. In a couple weeks you'll be able to turn down any candy cause it's not worth the space in your sleeve. I also understand temptation at work. We bake fresh Cookies for our patients and Peanut Butter cookies are my weakness. I'm glad to say I haven't had a cookie since the second of December!! My coworkers know about my surgery and still would offer me candy and treats. Some people just don't get it.

[Teachamy 1,042]

Self-control is an overused insult. How dare they say that to you!!! You are so right when you say that this type of food is your drug of choice. I know my drug of choice is anything salty/crunchy, namely chips. Thankfully, that is not typically the type of food that people bring to an office.

And good for you for asking your co-worker to limit what she brings in. Ask and ye shall receive, with any luck. Remember, if anyone is saying you are weak or are being judgmental of you, they will soon be intimidated by your amazing weight loss and strength.

[Hynita 113]

I personally feel they shouldn't have to stop because you have a hard time with those items. That's not there fault I could understand if it was your husband who is always trying to bring crap around. But really other people at work have there own choices. I know it may be hard but you just have to stick your ground and not pick up that candy. The end picture is much better then that candy. Good luck.

[npwomen 37]

Malsr, just the fact that you have shared these concerns with us will give you a level of commitment and strength you didn't know you had.

The mighty pen (keyboard) has power over the psyche.

[girliegirl 49]

i know its so hard and somedays its just harder then other to NOT give into our favorite foods. I find temptation in my own home sometimes. Im not sleeved yet, but i do have a family and children and they do like goodies. I buy icecream and treats for school and stuff. i have to choose to not eat them. of course i dont buy potatoe chips...thats my biggest trigger...

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

You could say health and safety have discovered mice or suspect mice on the premises and as a consequence, ALL foodstuffs need to be retained in cupboards and locked draws for the foreseeable future.

it'd get it out of your face.

Maybe I'm a bit oldskool here, but you're in an office. Not a pantry party. Having foodstuffs lying around willy-nilly is not the way to go. If they want it - put it in your desk - your own assigned space. Or better still - in a fridge.

The woman who is bringing it in is only dishing them out to salve her own guilt from chowing down on them.

Just my thoughts on the matter....

[DianaE 128]

I agree with Hynita.. It would be a perfect world if we could ask and expect everyone to help us but it just isnt like that.. You can control what you have in your own home and you can control what you reach for and put in your mouth.. That is about it.. I always dread it when i see a coworker has brought in something. Either I eat it or I dont but I can not ask them to not bring in the treats..

If you log everything you eat and do not go over your daily calories /carbs you will soon find it easier to resist those foods that are bad for you. They swallow up the calories and you are left with no calories left to eat and you are hungry.. Log eveything you put in your mouth.. You will find it very enlightening!

Edited February 26, 2014 by DianaE

[Malsr 49]

I personally feel they shouldn't have to stop because you have a hard time with those items. That's not there fault I could understand if it was your husband who is always trying to bring crap around. But really other people at work have there own choices. I know it may be hard but you just have to stick your ground and not pick up that candy. The end picture is much better then that candy. Good luck.

I agree, that's why I did not ask her to stop bringing in candy. We have food in and out of the office all of the time. I just asked that woman to woman and growing friend to friend, that she not bring in the type of candy that she did because it is a trigger for me. Like most people that work a full-time job, I spend most of my my waking hours at work. There is a 5 pound tub of Red Vines sitting right outside of my office door. I get that it's up to me to resist temptation, but I did not get WLS because resisting is easy. I definitely agree that the weight loss is much better than the candy, but I don't think it's unreasonable to ask not to be surrounded by it in my office. It's an unnecessary stressor, but I guess to each her own. I appreciate the cheers of good luck. I can use all that I can get.

Edited February 26, 2014 by Malsr

[MaryE 27]

I agree. It is very hard working on an office where people are always bringing Snacks, candy and enough of the birthday cakes. It's like that Seinfield episode when Elaine wants to loose weight and it's always someone else's birthday and she tries to boycott and they treat her like she is unsociable. food is and has always been social pressure. It's hard to just participate in the socialization without the food. But we try to sometimes we fail. We just have to try to focus on the future and on our longevity. Good luck to us all on our journey.

[JeanZ_RN 378]

I think it was absolutely ok for you to ask her to limit the types of candy, to help you out. It's a shame others have taken the liberty of commenting negatively on what should have stayed between the two of you.

Perhaps the candy could be moved to another location, so it's not such a constant trial for you? If that doesn't work, you might find that in your efforts to hurry past it you're becoming clumsy and <gasp> bumping into it and knocking it to the floor! Horrors! If that happens often enough she might decide a different location would be better...

If I had an abundance of self control I wouldn't have needed the sleeve!

Edited February 26, 2014 by JeanZ

[rbtnln 81]

I too worked in an office where there was candy around ALL THE TIME! And, regardless of my feelings, there were so many people who would eat it that it just didn't matter to them. Personally, I brought in Protein bars that I really liked (I just got some Quest Bars - chocolate chip cookie dough). I ate them super slow and by the time I was finished with a bar, I didn't even want the candy.

Keep in mind that this will always happen to you. There will always be something that you want right in front of you. You won't be able to stay away from it. Maybe, go ahead and take one of the candies, take a bite and throw the rest away. Just because it's there and you want some doesn't mean you have to eat the entire thing. Now, if you're doing that with 5 of them per day that may be a different issue, lol! But, if you really want one and can't get your mind off of it, wait until much later in the day, take one, take a bite, and throw it away. You'll get your satisfaction without eating the entire thing.

Good luck! You can do this!!!

[Midijola 19]

I don't really have a strong enough opinion to point out either way, just wanted to say that I have my revision from band to sleeve also on April 9....good luck!

[Malsr 49]

I don't really have a strong enough opinion to point out either way, just wanted to say that I have my revision from band to sleeve also on April 9....good luck!

Thank you! Good luck to you too!