Newbies: Unrealistic Expectations

[PrettyThick1 1,860]

I wanted to contribute this after reading someone's post this morning. Before you get your band you should have an idea of what you hope to gain from this procedure. Sure, most of us had to go through a psych evaluation in order to be approved. But let's be honest here...who didn't know what answers you SHOULDN'T give on the questionnaire? It's easy to trick the test, you can't fool yourself though. Let's be clear, my life has changed in ways that I could not have imagined and the fun part about all of it is that I didn't seek it. I, like many people on this forum chose to have WLS to get healthy and not much more than that...those of us already in love with life would just like to live it better. I knew a few things going in: it wouldn't be easy, I had to change my relationship with food and that if I followed the guidelines, I could expect to lose weight and possibly correct my comorbidities. Those were my expectations, very little more. Everything else that came along as a result I simply view as lagniappe ( Lan-Yap: Creole for a little something extra). Did I expect to be as happy about this lifestyle as I am? Absolutely not! I am still learning a lot, I've improved so much about me over the last eight months it's unreal. But again, those were my good surprises and I'm happy I didn't try to imagine everything that would change because of the band, sometimes it's better to just enjoy the ride and the little discoveries that you make from time to time.

With all of it's "powers to change a life", the band goes around your stomach, not your head (credit: Carolinagirl). You can take that a few ways, but for now I'll focus on the less obvious: if you aren't happy, having WLS might not necessarilly be the solution and in some cases it could have an opposite effect. You must know that there are many physical changes you can certainly expect, but if you have psychological concerns it's best to have those investigated prior to having the surgery...don't just answer the questions with the answers that will help you pass the evaluation. Be honest with yourself and take inventory of what's going on inside; changing the outside doesn't fix it all, but it does help. If you are depressed, please talk to someone and perhaps begin a regimen to assist you with your issue. Having WLS will not solve any underlying problems you have or help you gain an advantage over someone who may have done you wrong. If you have that idea in mind, you're in this for the wrong reasons anyway and you might not be as successful as you think.

[2muchfun 8,927]

"Let's be clear, my life has changed in ways that I could not have imagined and the fun part about all of it is that I didn't seek it."

AMEN!

[SillyAuntDi 1,610]

Could not have said it better!

For me, I had to come to terms with what I had done to MYSELF. It wasn't anyone else's fault I was 354lbs. It wasn't food's fault. It couldn't be blamed any longer on arthritis or allergies. It couldn't be blamed on the weather, the news, the book I was reading, my friend's babies...I had to shoulder the blame and then decide to change. I haven't looked back since.

[jamilyne 102668 1,207]

Good stuff & true - from all the above!

[gowalking 10,790]

So true. Great post.

[terrydumont46 1,954]

i get really depress sometimes especially when my band is tight and everything i eat is wrong. my brain wants a big mac, and to be able to wolf it down. i really throw a pity party. but what makes me feel better at times is going to the other wls pages and read their posts. there is one thing about the band that is so positive and makes me glad it chose me is that, it is adjustable. i haven't had reflux since getting it. nor any indigestion. i don't have to be worried about being malnourished. my brain thinks we are starving but it is a silly brain. i am glad i cannot eat around my band. plain and simple. so i think what i am trying to say is that we can get ourselves out of our little funks just by thinking positive thoughts. it may take longer with the band to loose wt. but we will get there.

[B-52 7,113]

"Let's be clear, my life has changed in ways that I could not have imagined and the fun part about all of it is that I didn't seek it."

I read posts here everyday and shake my head....and then keep my mouth shut...and wonder who some of these people are...(sorry)

If you want to be successful you have to be willing to accept change....the band demands it...yet I can see people here who complain about this and that, and all they are really doing is fighting it...refusing to let go...

Loosing weight is not that complicated...yet I read posts where every theory under the sun is talked to death as to how to loose weight...I ask myself "Where are people getting this trash?"

I thing people are convincing themselves of this nonsense while really avoiding the obvious truth right in front of their face.....

I also understand that we are/were fat because we had a LIFETIME of bad habits, and it is hard to give it up in a few months....even years....yet that is what I read...

Going through Weight Loss Surgery, for me, was an absolute last resort...I did not want to do this! And wish I never had to...! Let's be clear...I'm not proud of this....Yet I could not be more pleased and satisfied with the results....

I was at the end of my rope, and I was ready to do ANYTHING!!! Wire my jaw shut if that is what it takes...(providing I will never be hungry)

So when I experienced stuck episodes, had to give up certain foods for life, accept limited portions...etc,...I was ready...and learned, sometime the hard way, to change in order to fall in synch....

Yet I get the feeling that for some people, this is just another "Gimmick"...like any of those "Miracle" weight loss TV commercials....something cosmetic or designer....and do not wish to make any sacrifices....

I remember asking a Psychologist at one of the Hospitals what these Psych evals were all about......and among other things, she also said they want to be sure you are "Mature" and "Understand responsibility and know if you what you're getting into"

I also heard on this forum a few time in the past, that this WLS has become too common...to accepted and easy to get...and at the same time Weight Loss Surgery centers business is booming performing surgeries....

Sorry, I'll get off my soap box now....GOOD POST OP!

Edited February 27, 2014 by B-52

[CurvyCakes 269]

Great post!