Surgery scheduled, insurance approved, now I'm so confused!

[josephnyc 0]

Oxford's approved my surgery (apnea, diabetes, etc.), scheduled for March 12.

I'm about to start my 2 week liquid pre-op diet.

My head is swimming in confusion, ambivalence, fear, etc.

I'm 47, weigh 237lbs and 5' 8"

My ideal (I think) weight is 185. I've been down to about 190 (at my wedding, 15 years ago and 2 years into Atkins), and I felt much, much better than now.

I've been trying for 30 years to get to a healthy weight -- had moments of success, but always revert back to obese.

I keep learning about what life is like after surgery, as well as the risks of the procedure during and after.

Besides being terrified of surgery, I am a food addict (an overwhelming number of characteristics of any addiction apply to me and food). I don't know how I can change overnight from eating 4 slices of pizza before having the strength to stop (despite wanting to finish the pie) to eating 3 forkfulls?

Any help would sure be appreciated!

Thank you,

Joseph

[music1618 879]

The way you stop eating the entire pizza is that it will physically hurt to continue to eat. Also you will not be hungry! I explain the feeling to people as eating thanksgiving dinner. That over stuffed miserable feeling - well you will feel it just about every time you eat.

[josephnyc 0]

The way you stop eating the entire pizza is that it will physically hurt to continue to eat. Also you will not be hungry! I explain the feeling to people as eating thanksgiving dinner. That over stuffed miserable feeling - well you will feel it just about every time you eat.

Thanks for the help. I understand about feeling full and being unable to put more food into me because of the pain and my body's reactions if I do. What I'm wondering is what the frustration of not being able to do that will be like? Will I feel emotionally unsatisfied every time I eat?

[KittyKat848 93]

I had the same question before surgery. I couldn't imagine not wanting to eat or being satisfied by so little. After surgery, it has been an amazing transformation. I still like food, but I'm no longer obsessed. I think it's the regulation of hormones like ghrelin that change the appetite. It's funny, I can eat a few bites and be completely satiated.

[terry1118 1,274]

Thanks for the help. I understand about feeling full and being unable to put more food into me because of the pain and my body's reactions if I do. What I'm wondering is what the frustration of not being able to do that will be like? Will I feel emotionally unsatisfied every time I eat?

It takes time for emotional attachments to go away. At first I had a strong aversion to food smells and foods didn't taste 'right'. That helped a lot. After 4-6weeks things began to taste a little better. Eventually you'll have to replace the satisfied feeling you used to get from food with something else. Find an activity that makes you happy and do it. It should be something you enjoy. This gets easier to do as you lose and begin to the reap the benefits of that loss (feeling better, being able to be more active, fitting into smaller clothes, losing your aches and pains). Those benefits reinforce your resolve to stay on track. I literally had zero interest in food following surgery. And my experiences while learning what I could tolerate and how much I could eat helped seal the deal. Eating too much, food too dry, or eating too fast results in pure misery. You don't want to repeat that experience - it's a kind of aversion therapy. I still don't experience real hunger at 9 months post op - not in the way I used to. Before my stomach would growl and I'd feed it. Now if I go too long without eating (if I forget, or if I get too busy) I'll start feeling light-headed. Then if I can't eat a meal right away I'll grab a quick Protein snack to tide me over.

Until you go through it it's very hard to believe you could be disinterested in food. I couldn't believe it myself! But it's true for as lot of people. :-)

[esskay77 785]

I'm only a month and a half post op but what that person says is already true for me. THough I would say the first week and a half after surgery all I thought about was food. I could envision myself biting into delicious food and could almost taste it. Luckily I knew I couldn't have those foods. And then those cravings and thoughts disappeared. I think that what you will find, is that even when you eat a little bit and get full, you will have that satisfied feeling that you used to get with larger amounts of food. Of course, having said that, it's also best to see a therapist that has experience with weight loss surgery people and maybe even join overeaters anonymous. Those 2 things could really help out a lot.

You are doing the right thing having the surgery but you definitely need to follow the plan--eat small bites, take a long time to eat, drink Water 30 minutes before your meal and no Water or beverages with your meal, and then 30 minutes after your meal have more water. I think these are things that should be really useful. It's hard to practice but important.

Best of luck

[josephnyc 0]

Thank you all so much for sharing!

I hope I have the positive outlook that you all have after my surgery.

[Wallflower7522 328]

I'm still preop. My surgery is 9 days. One thing that's helped me so far has been to focus on eating slower and to really focusing on when my stomach is full and waiting for the rest of my body to catch up. It's really hard, and I don't always do great with it but I have noticed I've been eating less the last few weeks so at least it's a start. I don't know if you were told "put your fork down and take a break between bites" thing, but I think that really does help to. When I catch myself eating too fast, I just kind of mentally step back and give myself a minute.

Good luck with your surgery and you're liquid diet. If you haven't yet, go subscribe to the march surgeries thread and we can all keep up with each other

[Bronco0605 135]

The way you stop eating the entire pizza is that it will physically hurt to continue to eat. Also you will not be hungry! I explain the feeling to people as eating thanksgiving dinner. That over stuffed miserable feeling - well you will feel it just about every time you eat.

Thanks for the help. I understand about feeling full and being unable to put more food into me because of the pain and my body's reactions if I do. What I'm wondering is what the frustration of not being able to do that will be like? Will I feel emotionally unsatisfied every time I eat?

I do . I cannot find a way to solve that problem. I am exercising and eating the way I am supposed too. I am losing weight. But the emotional part is really a challenge. I am telling you the head part is way harder than the body part for me!

[josephnyc 0]

The way you stop eating the entire pizza is that it will physically hurt to continue to eat. Also you will not be hungry! I explain the feeling to people as eating thanksgiving dinner. That over stuffed miserable feeling - well you will feel it just about every time you eat.

Thanks for the help. I understand about feeling full and being unable to put more food into me because of the pain and my body's reactions if I do. What I'm wondering is what the frustration of not being able to do that will be like? Will I feel emotionally unsatisfied every time I eat?

I do . I cannot find a way to solve that problem. I am exercising and eating the way I am supposed too. I am losing weight. But the emotional part is really a challenge. I am telling you the head part is way harder than the body part for me!

Sorry to hear it's difficult for you. I know quite well the significant role the mind plays in eating to excess.

I see your surgery was in November, so there hasn't been too much time to adjust.

I hope you're (justifiably) very proud of the accomplishment to date.

In addition to the internal emotional stuff, I'm also concerned about the socialization aspect: There's not much that goes on when more than one person is involved that doesn't include eating or drinking -- and where food doesn't have a central role. I can imagine someone saying let's have dinner, or a party, or something and me thinking 'oh great, I'll have my 3 ounces -- how can I have fun?'

[terry1118 1,274]

Sorry to hear it's difficult for you. I know quite well the significant role the mind plays in eating to excess.

I see your surgery was in November, so there hasn't been too much time to adjust.

I hope you're (justifiably) very proud of the accomplishment to date.

In addition to the internal emotional stuff, I'm also concerned about the socialization aspect: There's not much that goes on when more than one person is involved that doesn't include eating or drinking -- and where food doesn't have a central role. I can imagine someone saying let's have dinner, or a party, or something and me thinking 'oh great, I'll have my 3 ounces -- how can I have fun?'

It's the socializing that's fun. Eating is just an activity you sometimes participate in while enjoying the company of friends and family. Go out, do things, have fun!

As for eating in social situations, this is what my Nut said: Become a gourmet. Have you ever seen the portions at gourmet restaurants? They are tiny! But it's good, delicious food! Eat small amounts of good food, eat slowly, and SAVOR the flavors. Enjoy conversation between bites. I've had no problems eating in restaurants or in other situations where food plays a big part. I've ordered appetizers as a meal (shrimp cocktail, pan-seared scallops), I've made a meal out of a cup of chowder or Soup, I've even eaten the toppings off pizza. You can make it work with practice. :-)

[skinny_minnie_wannabe 30]

I'm 2 weeks post op and I have had some difficulty with food obsession. Some days are easier than others. I know that I am not hungry but I yearn for the comfort. When I was bored I could just grab something and eat away. I can't do that anymore and while they say it will clear up, I have a deeper understanding. I was a food addict as well. The surgery will def help but we have to get to the root of the emotional reasons. It is important to deal with these things because of transfer addictions. I think that therapy and group support is important. I think that this journey makes us face things directly which is a blessing in disguise. Good luck!

[Cupcake 801]

I have not had my surgery yet but your fears are real, but I would focus on the procedure itself and take one day at a time because your eating habbits as well as taste will changed. From what I have read and research it will be impossible for you to eat like you are now. Good luck.