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Well, I for one am so psyched for you Kiara and I pray that everything goes well! It has got to be tough going through this knowing that some of the people you have told are not being supportive!

(((HUGS))))

I really hate the stigma that is attached to weight loss surgery, How someone loses weight is all relative and each method comes with risks and advantages.

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Thank you soo much Geekmom! You guys are why im soo proud to be apart of this community and why I feel comfortable moving forward with my decision!

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Though the people closest to me are all incredibly supportive, I totally understand how you feel. I think in a weird way, I've been them. My sister had RNY 8 years ago and I pretty much felt it was "the easy way out" and lazy. I am using the hateful terms because that is what I thought... though I never said it or expressed it to her. My dad also had RNY and I think with him I was far more understanding because I had seen him go up and down over 100 pounds at a time over his life and saw the struggle and roller coaster ride... I knew he had tried. My sister ont he other hand, maybe once or twice she went on a short lived diet and even after WLS she eats unhealthy and is in my opinion not a healthy person. I always swore I would NEVER take that road. Yes obesity runs in my family, yes I have endocrine disorders (hyperprolactinemia, PCOS, IR) but I had this mentality that I was going to do it the "right way." In my mind, the only way to be proud of oneself.

OK< so 20 years of doing it the right way, age 40, a huge investment in personal trainers, nutritionists, and obsessively endlessly dieting... I have had several injuries in the last year from cross fit style workouts, I have become more afraid of my obsessive lifestyle than I am of WLS (complications or judgement from others). So to those people who express that I should go about it the "traditional" way, here is my reply.

It is a fact that only 3-5% of people that lose a significant amount of weight manage to keep it off the traditional way. I've found myself in the 95-97th percentile of that battle most my life and NOT For lack of effort, so you'll have to just suck it up and accept that it is important enough to me that I am willing to take drastic measures that statistically give me a 60-80% chance of reaching and staying at/near my goal as well as significantly increase my chances of a longer more quality life, than continuing to live in that 95% fail rate and suffering the consequences of obesity.

It kinda shuts people up... ask them how many people that lost 50plus pounds in their life and kept it off... MAYBE than can think of one that did it without surgery. maybe... and they may have had surgery and just not shared that fact.

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It is amazing how poorly people count.

They can't seem to count to one, that's the number of lives each of us have.

No one yet has lived for two people.

The brain in each head is supposed to control what it's body does.

We are sovereign territory which only we have the deed to.

The truth is you have to fight for your right to own your own life. Power hungry life hackers seek to have points of control in as many heads as their coercion skill allows. It is up to us to keep possession of that which is ours.

It is our life, our body, our right to our own thinking and life direction. If running my own life comes at the expense of losing the companionship of those who wish to direct my destiny by whipping me with insult and slander, it is a price that I am happily prepared to pay.

Power hungry life hackers is the best new term I've heard (texted) It will replace my usual saying of "Hater gonna Hate"

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I told my family and friends that while I respect whatever their feelings are toward wls, if their feelings weren't positive to please keep them to themselves. What I need is support whether you agree with my decision or not. I just walk away shaking my head when people say something stupid.

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Just walk on past the soul suckers. A year or so from now, the joke will be on them.

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    • BabySpoons

      Sometimes reading the posts here make me wonder if some people just weren't mentally ready for WLS and needed more time with the bariatric team psychiatrist. Complaining about the limited drink/food choices early on... blah..blah...blah. The living to eat mentality really needs to go and be replaced with eating to live. JS
      · 2 replies
      1. Bypass2Freedom

        We have to remember that everyone moves at their own pace. For some it may be harder to adjust, people may have other factors at play that feed into the unhealthy relationship with food e.g. eating disorders, trauma. I'd hope those who you are referring to address this outside of this forum, with a professional.


        This is a place to feel safe to vent, seek advice, hopefully without judgement.


        Compassion goes a long way :)

      2. BabySpoons

        Seems it would be more compassionate not to perform a WLS on someone until they are mentally ready for it. Unless of course they are on death's door...

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
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    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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