abarta83 118 Posted February 17, 2014 Pretty sure its true..just a hard pill to swallow..he liked me better fat with no self confidence..today he asked me why I think I'm the shit since surgery if I haven't even lost "the weight" yet...and reminded me that when we met I was just an overweight single mother with no friends and no man...and he made me awesome ...I never heard him say such hateful mean things...wtf... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gohelpyourself 377 Posted February 17, 2014 No disrespect but dude sounds like a tool! His comments are very demeaning. Kick his ass to the curb. You need a partner who lifts you up not breaks you down... he isn't supportive... he sounds very insecure and when you 'lose the weight' it will get worse. My two cents for what it's worth. P.S You ARE the shit. Don't let any man convince you otherwise. 25 I love me, RSifers, Mr.sleeve and 22 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
niassy151 60 Posted February 17, 2014 That's so incredibly disrepectful. I can't tell you what to do, and I don't know the details of your relationship, but I know I would not be okay with someone talking to me that way. I think you should re-evaulate your relationship, minimally. 4 Mr.sleeve, onedaycloser, gohelpyourself and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
abarta83 118 Posted February 17, 2014 I totally agree I was stunned I looked at him like..damn...I lost like 50 pounds and can run a mile..if I didn't loose that weight where the eff did it go? 4 Babypee49, sonsmg02lu3, CoffeeGrinDR and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BrantS1976 243 Posted February 17, 2014 I have to agree with Belladonna723. You are the **** and he is acting like a douche. I can understand how someone going through the changes we all go through could bring up some odd feelings in one's significant other, but as a man his comments to you offend me. They show a complete lack of respect for you and a desire to just keep you down. I'm not one to tell people how to live their life, but you deserve better! Hopefully he can come around and treat you better. If not, then do whatever is best for you as you deserve so much more than that kind of treatment. 12 onedaycloser, abarta83, SleevedJune62013 and 9 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
abarta83 118 Posted February 17, 2014 Thanks for the support...as of this evening his things are packed and he's on the couch..I'm nobody's door Mat..I've never taken crap off him and I'm not about to start... 19 graymadebbie, AshleyMidwife, sonsmg02lu3 and 16 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nnegrete329 40 Posted February 17, 2014 Thanks for the support...as of this evening his things are packed and he's on the couch..I'm nobody's door Mat..I've never taken crap off him and I'm not about to start... It's only going to get better! Don't even worry about it. 1 sonsmg02lu3 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
one_more_time 145 Posted February 17, 2014 Thanks for the support...as of this evening his things are packed and he's on the couch..I'm nobody's door Mat..I've never taken crap off him and I'm not about to start... Oh my...he's really going to be lovin' you when you hit your goal. Just be thankful he allowed you to see whats really in his heart before you wasted anymore time. Life is too short...and it GOES ON! Best wishes..... 5 Babypee49, BellaHugz, NewSetOfCurves and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BellaHugz 331 Posted February 17, 2014 (edited) Pretty sure its true..just a hard pill to swallow..he liked me better fat with no self confidence..today he asked me why I think I'm the **** since surgery if I haven't even lost "the weight" yet...and reminded me that when we met I was just an overweight single mother with no friends and no man...and he made me awesome ...I never heard him say such hateful mean things...wtf... Oh my goodness, this guy is a mental abuser! If you kept him in your life he would only play games with you as his insecurities got stronger. I am so proud of you for getting him out of your life and your kids life! Now girl consentrate on making yourself stronger and teach your kids that this kind of behaviour is not allowed in your life or theirs! PSsss, How much did that looser weight? Cause you can count that extra weight off and watch your weight come off now too!! Hugz baby!! Edited February 18, 2014 by BellaHugz 3 sonsmg02lu3, Dr-Patient and nomytx reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NotSoTall 33 Posted February 17, 2014 Wow. Sounds like your head is on straight and his, apparently not so much. To imply you were awesome because of him? Nope, sorry...he should be reminding you how awesome he is because of YOU! He's got things twisted. It's up to you to decide if he made your life any better, not him. Best of luck to you and you're doing a great job!! Take care of yourself. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BabySheldon 158 Posted February 17, 2014 Pretty sure its true..just a hard pill to swallow..he liked me better fat with no self confidence..today he asked me why I think I'm the **** since surgery if I haven't even lost "the weight" yet...and reminded me that when we met I was just an overweight single mother with no friends and no man...and he made me awesome ...I never heard him say such hateful mean things...wtf... What???.. Shel Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Butterflyhigh 504 Posted February 18, 2014 So sorry. That really sucks to hear your partner say that. I'm going to play devil's advocate for a minute... Is he in general a decent guy? It is not abnormal for the spouse of someone who is going through a big change like you're going through to become insecure and scared of the changes. He may be doubting himself, his place in your life, the shifting of the relationship, your love for him, etc. You're new found confidence, while so totally awesome and wonderful, is probably changing the dynamics of the relationship. If he is in general a decent guy...loves you, respects you, is not cruel, is supportive....then he may need more understanding and support from you for his burgeoning insecurities. Relationships end so quickly these days without both people giving all they can to save them. If he is in general an ass...then maybe your confidence will give you the strength to end it with him. Good luck! 1 hatters reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cindy Quebedeaux Breaux 9 Posted February 18, 2014 Good luck. You do not need him in your life. You are an incredible person and strong. You will get through this and it will make you stronger. Remember that you are #1. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1newday2 13 Posted February 18, 2014 You might what to so what Beyonce said To The Left. To The Left. 1 BellaHugz reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jujubslim 95 Posted February 18, 2014 Be strong and love yourself, you're beautiful and he knows it. He sounds like someone with self esteem issues and he's lashing out because he's afraid he's going to lose you. Don't allow him to bring you down and don't let your kids think this is how a.man should talk to a lady. 1 BellaHugz reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites