Met woman with same surgical date

mariecarmen · March 28, 2007

I went to the support group at my surgeon's office this week and saw a woman there I recognized as having had her surgery the same day as me.

What struck me most was our conversation after the surgery. All she talked about was how she was going to be thin and hot and make some guy at her job crazy (she's married) over her new body. At the time, my goal was to ease up the surgical gas pain so I wasn't fully participating in this conversation.

So, here we meet up again in the support group 6 months later. I don't think she's lost even 10 lbs. She's quiet during group, didn't appear to remember me at all. I feel so badly for her. She's a big woman, close to 300 lbs. I said a few things to her to try and start a neutral conversation and she was polite, but distant.

I have to wonder what happened that's taken the wind from her sails. I hope she gets on track after going through all the work of getting the band.

Alexandra · March 28, 2007

I have to wonder what happened that's taken the wind from her sails.

Two words: Unrealistic expectations.

So many people hear the words "weight-loss surgery" and think that's all there is to it--you have surgery, you lose the weight. But the truth is a bit different, and people who are not prepared for the journey aspect are often taken by unpleasant surprise.

Banding surgery is just a beginning, and just the very first step on a long journey. I hope your acquaintance can come around and see that she's been given a gift and if she uses it right, she can meet her goals.

And I hope her goals change a bit, too.

juliegeraci · March 28, 2007

Marie, just goes to show you there is a journey for everyone.

Being lapbanded isn't the easy way out. Poor thing, I hope she has enough restriction. Nice of you to reach out to her.

HarleyNana · March 28, 2007

My band partner, who I met the day after surgery, not only was banded the same day, right after me, but we share the same birthday, how's that for strange.

TracyinKS · March 28, 2007

Two words: Unrealistic expectations.
And I hope her goals change a bit, too.

WOW! This is a good gut check for ANYONE getting ready to go through this.

kansas sooner · April 27, 2007

WOW! This is a good gut check for ANYONE getting ready to go through this.

I have seen you posting and know that you have been on a journey getting to this day!!! can't wait to see/hear how you are doing.. My date is the 24th, I don't want a gut check, just that date to be here. I think i will keep myself busy busy busy so i won't have to think about this.. let us know how you are! Will say a pray for you!