New addictions?

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

My surgery team also stressed this, and specifically my surgeon, in a humorous way. He said I would need a new addiction now. I can shop, I can buy shoes, I can gamble, but I can't overeat. The psychologist was more serious, and said I needed to figure out what can give me joy. food has always given me joy, and now I'll need to figure out something else, or I'll go back to overeating.

I lost a lot of weight many years ago (not WLS) and dropped from 305 to 156 over two years. As I went down in size, I attended 12-step meetings several days a week, jogged on a track for three miles twice a week, and shopped for clothes every other minute. While also working full time and going to night school. I was single then, and had to fill the hours with activity or else I knew I would eat. The new skinny me met my husband at my high school reunion and we married a year later. I gained eleven pounds on my honeymoon, thirty with each of my two daughters, and it's been up from there ever since. I stopped all my healthy habits and dropped OA because he thought it was brainwashing, and I was too insecure to fight for myself. I did the "acceptable" Weight Watchers dozens of times since then, all ending in failure. At 302 pounds, I began to research WLS, and I am currently 3-1/2 weeks post-banding and have dropped 36 pounds since February.

Boy, this got long. LOL What I actually wanted to say was that during my shopping frenzy as a thinning person, I racked up some hefty credit card bills. One day my BFF and I were in Nordstrom's just passing through. We were dressed in sweats and weren't shopping there, just walking through. I saw a gorgeous evening gown and ran over to it. I'm talking beaded, floor length, stunning. The kind of dress that could only be worn to the Academy Awards. It was a size 10. We fawned over it and a saleslady came over and asked if I wanted to try it on. My friend and I busted out laughing, and said no thanks. She said, go ahead. Just try it on. I'll get you some pumps too. Well, I tried on that gorgeous dress and the shoes, and it fit. I stood there and my BFF and I just couldn't believe it. I felt like a movie star. That saleslady knew we were just walking by, but she gave me a gift I will never forget. For the first time in my life, I felt beautiful. Not thinner, not better than before, but beautiful. That dress was several thousand dollars. It went back on the mannequin, and a few weeks later was gone from the display.

I learned two things that day. I was beautiful. And I didn't have to spend a penny to try something on.

Afterwards, I modified my spending addiction into a trying-on addiction. I'd go to stores, try on some blouses and pants, and put them back. Once every couple of weeks I would purchase something affordable, instead of purchasing everything.

I am an addict, and I've given up overeating. I have no doubt my compulsive personality will seek out something new. I'm not in my twenties anymore, so the things I seek will be different. I expect I'll learn a lot about myself this time.

I hope some of this helps somebody. It was eye-opening for me to write it.

[jovonap 11]

I find myself cleaning and reading again more. Im struggling with eating but what im doing is working.

[Gel 9]

I'm addicted to Starbucks coffee! I was never a coffee drinker before.

[terry1118 1,274]

Shopping! It used to reduce me to tears and always ended with me feeling miserable and depressed followed by binging on sweets. Now it's a pleasurable activity that makes me happy! I love to dress up!

[Mississippi Girl 124]

What an interesting question. I've never thought about it. However, after reading this, I'll have to say, I do read more. I do spend more time doing things my husband wants to do. Of course, I am on this site a lot! I am enjoying this journey. I will be on the look out for what I am leaning towards after reading this question. I lost down to a size 3 about five years ago. I felt fantastic. I gained most of that back, and have lived the life of a hermit. I was so afraid of seeing someone I knew…knowing they would say, "OMG, look how much weight she's gained". I did this so much my husband thought I was ashamed of him. To me, he's the most handsome man on earth. I was just ashamed of me. I never want to have that desperate feeling again. Praying this works, once and for all! I am a lifer. Started my first diet at 14 with just a few pounds to lose. Then gained that back plus some…..

[Kitt3000 757]

I've found the same Gel, Starbucks. OMG if it were only closer!

Shopping started from necessity, now- I think it has become too much fun, not spending- just wanting to be out of the house and looking, trying on smaller sizes. I've always loved shoes and boots- because my feet are smaller... Yikes!

I don't have that many feet, for Pete's sake! At least I get steps in on my fit bit...

[Katcloudshepherd 630]

Hello everyone,

I mostly shop at Goodwill. I can't afford to spend too much on clothes that won't be the right size for long. That is such a GOOD THING. It is still a thrill to find clothes I can fit in that are smaller than I've been in decades.

I'm going to have to be carefull not to transfer that obsession I had with food to something else.

Kathleen

[awold0 246]

So what about boredom? Anxiety? Stressed? Have you become addicted to your phone or laptop? Do you just get out and move? Do you have new hobbies? Do you shop? Are you drinking more coffee/ tea than before? What about using alcohol or gambling? Have your pets become your focus? Anyone showing dogs or horses? Has your kindle list expanded with new books? Have you become a social butterfly? Is your garden in the best shape ever? Are your activities solitary or groups? Join a league of some kind? Competitive ?

This really hits home for me. I am 10 months out and down over 100 lbs. Around 6 months I started shopping like crazy. I found myself wanting to go to the mall ever day. Then it seemed dull for me.

I then had family visit in Feb and I went out and had a few cocktails. Then it was cocktails 2 days a week. Then it turned to every day cocktails. Mind you I used crystal light and logged my drinks so I did not gain.

I have never talked to a therapist so I called my doctor and got referral. A very long time ago in my 20's I went to AA. I am now starting this again. It seems I have a compulsive issue going on. I am glad I am facing it and getting help but I am one of the unfortunate ones that seem to be dealing with cross addiction. I'm glad I learned about this via bpal. It is a daily struggle but I did this surgery to be healthy and happy.

[Kitt3000 757]

I totally believe in therapy, any good book suggestions regarding cross addiction? Says the girl who went to Starbucks twice today, and walked three miles in the mall... No shoes today..:-)

I did purchase a new gratitude journal!

[Gel 9]

What do you drink from Starbucks?

[Kitt3000 757]

Grande fat free latte with 1/2 Splenda. 100 calories. If it's not coffee, I am drinking Water. I actually have to drive 15-20 to get a Starbucks - so yes.. I would love to drink it more often!

[RNBSN786 206]

I am not sure if it's addiction but I prefer everything unsweetened. Even at Starbucks I get passion tea unsweetened...I don't have the desire for sugar nor salt. I didn't like salty things before surgery and now I don't have the tolerance either. I like every that is also low salt....

[Kitt3000 757]

I don't know... Running May become my new interest...

I took my rat pack out for a speed walk/ jog, and did not even get out of breath! Yippee!

[Forsythia 882]

I'd say my thing is the gym. I'm in there for almost two hours. But honestly that is my time to decompress and deal with work/home/etc stress.

[futurbander2007 24]

I replaced food addiction with fitness. I was a walker at first, slowly became a runner, and now I'm a long distance runner averaging 15-20 miles a day. Running gives me a feeling of pure joy that I used to get with food.