I'm disappointed....

[kltklass 144]

This post helped me when I started to compare my story to others on this forum. I have reprinted it with permission from Cheri, the author. I hope this helps you stay positive.

Please stop and do the math by Cheri

People get completely freaked out by what I feel are unreasonable expectations. They fly into a panic. They assume that the first time they don't lose on the scale that their loss is done. They think that two weeks at one weight is a massive stall. They look at other people's large losses and forget that we don't all lose at the same rate.

First - if you did a pre-op diet you are not going to have the same loss your first month as someone who didn't do one. Your pre-op loss should get counted into your loss calculation if you did a pre-op diet.

Second - a stall is three weeks or more at the same weight with no fluctuation. Are you panicked after that? Well, my friend coops once spent twenty one MONTHS at the same weight. She finally broke through and never regained during that time, and even lost two sizes while not budging on the scale. Is it the miracle cure you may have been hoping for on the scale? No. But stalls are not the end of the world. They are certainly more normal that flying to goal in six weeks, I promise you.

Third - losing anything more than a pound a week is good. Are you eating less than ever before? Yes. Does that guarantee you'll lose faster than ever before? No. I had two nine week stalls - no movement except upwards for my monthly cycle. I had months where I lost but only in the tenths of a pound. It's not normal to expect a big loss every time you step on the scale. It's setting yourself up for disappointment.

Fourth - your pattern is your pattern. You can compare yourself to other people sleeved the same day or with the same stats but it doesn't matter. So much of this is individual. So if you're constantly seeking out other people and comparing your losses to theirs, you are eventually going to discourage and frustrate yourself.

Fifth - are you closing in on goal? We all lose even more slowly the less weight we have to lose. So if you only have sixty pounds to lose but shed thirty in your first three months, please don't be hysterical because you're "only" losing a pound a week now that you're past the halfway point. It's normal.

Stop. Breathe. Do the math. Adjust your expectations. This is not a race. You do not get a special award for reaching goal more quickly. Your surgery was not pointless or worthless if you manage to get to goal in two years instead of six months. The real goal is not losing the weight. It's keeping the weight off. That's real success - that's what we're here to do. It does not matter if you hit goal in nine months or two years - the real challenge and the real journey begins with maintenance. How quickly or slowly you lost does nothing to change the challenges you'll encounter there.

I am not ranting at anyone in particular. I just feel that this is an issue that comes up constantly and it's actually pretty silly for people to fly into such a panic without really thinking. I've seen folks upset when they're logging losses of upwards of four pounds a week. Point to the diet that helped you accomplish that and was easy to maintain prior to surgery.

[Tamosy 65]

I've scoured these boards for years... this is my first post/reply...

Thank you for posting your disappointment! I will be sleeved tomorrow and your post helps me to gain perspective. I read 18 pounds in two months and think, "WOW, that would be awesome"! But I relate to you feeling like it isn't much. Frankly, I expect a lot less than that.

You have a relatively low BMI to begin with...it is hard not to compare to others, but when you do, you are not comparing apples to apples.

I have lost 5 pounds in the 2 week pre op diet of under 30 carbs, under 10 g. fat, and under 900 calories. I wanted to cry when I saw I only lost 5 pounds these last two weeks.

I need to lose 50 pounds to get to my goal and my Dr. thinks if I do everything right, it will take me 9 months. That is an average loss of 5 1/2 pounds per month.

Your post reminds me to be realistic and expect it to feel slow. Hang in there, our bodies are odd machines, sometimes the input can stay the same, but the body shifts gears when it is ready.

Keep driving it as instructed and it will keep shifting gears, not always when you want it to, but it will. Head up and thanks for being honest and preparing me for the reality that even success can not feel good with misaligned expectations.

PS... I also learned over the years that splenda does not work for me either. I refuse to use any artificial sweeteners, my body just doesn't react well to them. I would rather have less of the real thing, I try to use honey, coconut sugar, agave nector, or some form of natural sweetener that at least has health benefits...and I still consider it a cheat, but it comes with less guilt and my body actually does better with it.

Good luck to you!

[jujubslim 95]

Remember it's not the number of pounds you lose, it's what % of your excess. If you have a higher bmi weight loss numbers look huge compared to someone with a lower bmi.

[EggWithLegs 23]

Thanks everyone. I'll try to keep my chin up.