Surviving when life sucks

[Branmuffin 190]

Thank you for thinking of us when you are going through so much grief right now. You are so right about living in the now. I lost my niece in Sept and struggle daily and I was just her aunt.

Please keep leaning on your family and friends.

[CrazyJaney 775]

Many, many prayers for you and your family. What wonderful words to help us all realize there is a much bigger picture besides numbers on a scale and the exact amount of calories/protein/carbs we ingest. Truly, I've been sitting here beating myself up for an exceptionally bad food day, seriously having doubts about whether I'm strong enough to go through this. You are so right! Life is a series of events, many, but not all, made better by WLS. Prayers for peace, comfort, healing and grace for you sweet girl.

[carstanger 346]

<p>I have been a pretty frequent poster here since last March, except for the past few weeks. Almost 3 weeks ago, my husband was killed in a tragic fire at his brother's house. I am still reeling from the shock & trying desperately to find my way through this awful new reality into which I have been thrown. I miss him so much, at times I almost can't catch my breath. I am incredibly fortunate to have a strong & loving support network of amazing friends & family. Eventually, I will be OK. But at the moment, I am struggling to eat enough, I started smoking again, and I am having a drink each night to help me sleep. At some point, with the help of the many wonderful people who love me, I will find my way back to a healthy and happy path. I believe that in my head, even if I can't yet feel it in my heart. I am thankful that my improved physical condition will help me be better prepared to take care of myself now than I would have been six months ago.</p> <p> </p> <p>But here's the thing I want to say to you. Sometimes, life is going to suck. Surgery is not a magic cure-all for the problems we deal with. Life is going to throw us curve balls & challenging situations. Sometimes we can prepare ourselves for those challenges, but sometimes there is simply nothing that will prepare us to face what we must. So, when life rises up & punches you in the face, remember these guidelines: </p> <p> </p> <p>Spend more of your time focusing on your achievements rather than your shortcomings. </p> <p> </p> <p>Devote more energy to expressing your love to others rather than tallying up the things that piss you off.</p> <p> </p> <p>Understand that we are all far more than a number on a scale. If you are waiting to try new things until you lose weight, STOP WAITING. Your life is happening now, here, today....don't let it pass you by because of fear, insecurity, or doubt. </p> <p> </p> <p>If you pray, send me a prayer. If you don't pray, then send me good vibes & healing thoughts. I appreciate all the good & supportive thoughts I can get right now.</p>

so sorry for this tragic turn of events!! Remember your good times. I pray for peace! We are here for you!

[CrissyRing77 232]

Oh my goodness I am so saddened to hear this! I too have read your posts and found you to be inspiring! Many prayers, good thoughts, healing thoughts all of it coming your way! Please do take care of yourself and let others take care of you too! We are all here for you if you need to talk, vent, cry or help when you're ready to get back on track! Thank YOU for your enlightening words they really hit home for me right now! Big hugs!

[VSG AJH 499]

I have been a pretty frequent poster here since last March, except for the past few weeks. Almost 3 weeks ago, my husband was killed in a tragic fire at his brother's house. I am still reeling from the shock & trying desperately to find my way through this awful new reality into which I have been thrown. I miss him so much, at times I almost can't catch my breath. I am incredibly fortunate to have a strong & loving support network of amazing friends & family. Eventually, I will be OK. But at the moment, I am struggling to eat enough, I started smoking again, and I am having a drink each night to help me sleep. At some point, with the help of the many wonderful people who love me, I will find my way back to a healthy and happy path. I believe that in my head, even if I can't yet feel it in my heart. I am thankful that my improved physical condition will help me be better prepared to take care of myself now than I would have been six months ago.

But here's the thing I want to say to you. Sometimes, life is going to suck. Surgery is not a magic cure-all for the problems we deal with. Life is going to throw us curve balls & challenging situations. Sometimes we can prepare ourselves for those challenges, but sometimes there is simply nothing that will prepare us to face what we must. So, when life rises up & punches you in the face, remember these guidelines:

Spend more of your time focusing on your achievements rather than your shortcomings.

Devote more energy to expressing your love to others rather than tallying up the things that piss you off.

Understand that we are all far more than a number on a scale. If you are waiting to try new things until you lose weight, STOP WAITING. Your life is happening now, here, today....don't let it pass you by because of fear, insecurity, or doubt.

If you pray, send me a prayer. If you don't pray, then send me good vibes & healing thoughts. I appreciate all the good & supportive thoughts I can get right now.

Oh my goodness, I am so sorry! I follow your posts, and I am just heartbroken to read your news. Absolutely praying for you.

[meamo 42]

Omg..I cant even imagine your pain.. So sorry for your loss...sending you prayers

[Redwillow13 29]

I will definitely be lifting you up in prayer. Thank God you're surrounded by love and strength. Doesn't take away the hurt, but it does help to know that you're held up by others.

[southernsoul 773]

My deepest condolences for your loss. Death of a loved one is hard enough to deal with let alone a death that is tragic.

I hope you don't mind but I work in psychiatry and I think you could really benefit from some grief counseling now to get you through this. Please consider making an appointment with a psychologist or clinician in your area who specializes in grief counseling. It may help your tremendously. I am praying for you.

I am actually in my second year of a masters degree in clinical mental health counseling. Several of my friends are clinicians, as well. Reaching out to a therapist to help me through this was one of the first things I did. For me, being able to have that safe and non-judgmental space in which to process all the elements of this tragedy is absolutely crucial. Right now, I'm in the tunnel & I can't see the end...but I know I'm not alone in the dark & that helps a lot.

[Lorie269 392]

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you hugs and prayers.

[indecision 863]

So sorry for your loss! Stay strong!

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

I am so sorry hun...It is so fresh and painful and yet you took the time to let us know and to encourage us..Thank you for that!!!!!!!

Please except my condolences and I hope that you will find your way through this horrible life changing experience...My thoughts are with you.

Please allow yourself to feel what you feel at the time and work through it, though the natural process of grief...

[reading mom 85]

i am deeply sorry for your loss! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

[shadylady_57 54]

I am so sorry to hear about your loss , I know how hard it is to loose a loved one . I lost my son 3 days after giving birth to him, he would have been 27 this july. I didn't think I could go on but I had a 14 month old at home that needed me, I thank God for this comfort at that time, and for all the support ofmy family and friends. You have to take one day at a time, and the greif will gradually get where it's easier to handel ,but you never forget them they are always in your heart and memories. Your husband would be proud of you for the way you are going on with your recovery, he would want you to keep on with your program and continue with your wt loss, you seem to be a strong person and I know it's darkest before the dawn but you will make it. If you need fo talk we are all here for you . God Bless and keep you in your time of greif I will be praying for you and your family Loujse

[Dani.o.dani 67]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Wishing you all the best!

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

You certainly have my support, hopes, thoughts, good vibes and prayers.

I truly am so sorry for your loss.

I send you my very, very best wishes for good luck, peace and strength.

Ann