female only New guy

[Roo101769 742]

Hi all.. I thought I would take a few minutes to write about another "life event" going on that does not directly involve my sleeve. ( Maybe indirectly, in some way or another. ) I have met a new guy. I feel kind of weird and girlish just saying that...LOL I guess I should start at the beginning of sorts...I was married briefly from 1995-1999. In that time we were actually only together less than two years. We were separated a few years before we actually got divorced. So I am kind of like those celebrities with short term marriages. Anyway, prior to being married I never had a big problem having "a boyfriend". I was young, I was still in fairly ok shape and it wasn't hard to get asked out. After marriage it was an entirely different world. I gained a significant amount of weight during the time I was with my ex husband. It was a perfect storm in a way. First, I have PCOS. Until my mid twenties I was not effected by it very much. Then around 25yrs old the symptoms really went gangbusters. Second, I was married. I did let myself go and eat because hey, I already bagged the guy. Who cares now if I eat? Besides, he likes to eat too. And the last thing was depression. My marriage wasn't what I had hoped for, obvious by the short deration. Comfort food helped me cope. Along with these things I had gone from jobs where I was on my feet to a desk job, further compounding the weight issue. So I was thirty, divorced, obese and alone. I tried to meet guys. Ok, after about ten years I tried. For the better part of the next decade I closed myself off. It was easier NOT to date and be hurt. A lot of things happened in my life that I had to deal with and there was just no time to worry about adding a man to the mix. After many years I realized I was lonely. I had friends, sure. But it is not the same at all. So I started trying to put myself out there more. Long story short, didn't work out. Many things happened but none were good. I don't regret too much, it was part of life. ( and I did end up with the most amazing and beautiful daughter from it all) I just never give up. I keep trying. I keep looking.....And now I can report I have some hope. It is too early to say this is "the one". But a few key factors are certainly weighing in his favor. First, he went on a date with me AND my daughter! We had a great time and my girl really likes him. ( another guy I once dated she did not care for and made it known) Second, he likes how I look. He appreciates what I have gone through to get here, is all for supporting me as I continue, and finds me sexy now! And the best thing? He wants a relationship! Not a "hit it and quit it" "NSW FWB" or a booty call. This guy is looking to (one day) settle down and get married again. I don't know him well enough to jump to that conclusion right now, but it is such a relief and nice feeling to know I might actually have a Valentine this year on Valentine's day!!!

[Mama Spike 144]

Congratulations!

[JeanZ_RN 378]

Wow! There really IS hope... !! Thanks for posting!

[McButterpants 2,846]

Happy for you! You deserve this.

Keep us updated on the Love Connection!

[Katcloudshepherd 630]

Congratulations!

I met my husband when I was engaged to a man I ALMOST made the awful mistake of marrying. I finally woke up and smelled the coffee,(more like something finally hit me upside the head with a 2x4), and all the while I had known my current husband. We were friends before we ever became intimate. I have a cousin who had the same thing happen. She was friends with her long time husband before they were married.

That's just my own experience--friends first, then a serious relationship. I've been married for 22 years and even though my husband is 100% disabled vet--I've stuck with him.

Good Luck,

Kathleen

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,282]

God Bless! Wishing you the best.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I just recently told a friend that I had feelings for him and things are going very well between us.

Losing weight has sooooo many benefits. I hope things continue to go well for you too!

[BellaHugz 331]

Congratulations!

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I really feel like this is the man I've been looking for. I was so afraid to tell him how I felt because we have been good friends. I was really afraid I was going to lose my friend.

I am so glad it turned out he felt the same way. I had no clue all this time.

[Roo101769 742]

Update: He was SOOOOOO not "it". Long story short he is a scammer. Apparently I need to work on me a bit more before I am ready to consider finding a relationship. I still have a "fat brain" and all the insecurities that go with it. This guy managed to figure that out and used it for all it was worth. I will never say never, but for now I am not looking in particular.

[PRINCESSM 210]

I have found that so many men scam us ladies who may have self esteem issues. Those of us with a heart cannot fathom doing that, but it comes so easily to them.

[1sunnuri 77]

You are so correct there are scammers of all contexts of the heart and pocket book.